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Friday, June 3, 2011 – Daily News 5B FEATURES Daughter distances dad Dear Annie: I have two daugh- ters, ‘‘Kathy’’ and her younger sis- ter, ‘‘Carly,’’ both in their late 20s. Carly and I have always had a rocky relation- ship, stemming from my being the disciplinarian since my wife refused to do it. Kathy always Annie’s Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar seemed more understanding and forgiving. After Carly graduated and I no longer sent her monthly checks, she stopped speaking to me. She only contacted me when she need- ed something. Last fall, she had my first grandchild. I didn’t even know she was pregnant until I got a card from her a few months after the baby was born. I still don’t know the baby’s name, sex or birth date or if Carly married the father. I don’t even know who the father is. I’m heartbroken, not only because Carly kept it a secret, but because Kathy also kept it from me. Kathy says she didn’t want to get involved because it was between Carly and me. How do I deal with this? — Need Help in Kentucky Dear Kentucky: You must for- give Kathy. She was between a rock and a hard place, but she was right that the decision to inform you belonged to her sister. Instead of focusing on how much this hurt, try to look for ways to mend your relationship with both of your daughters, espe- cially Carly. You might even ask Kathy for help and suggestions. And sometimes a new grandchild can provide a reason to repair an estrangement. We hope so. Dear Annie: I’ve been married for 19 years. We have a blended family with four children still at home. ‘‘Joe’’ is an alcoholic and a heavy smoker. When I was ready to leave him over the drinking, he begged me to stay and is now two months sober. We quit smoking together 11 years ago, but after four years, Joe started up again. He’s now smoking three packs a day, often in the house. My father had four brothers who smoked. Three of them died of lung cancer, as did my father. Given my family history, I do not want my children or myself exposed to cigarette smoke. I hate the smell on my hair and clothes. Kids at school have asked my 16- year-old if she started smoking because they can smell it on her. Joe does not believe second- hand smoke is a health risk. I begged him, in tears, to stop smok- ing in the house. I do not want to give up on a 19-year marriage, but I want to live to see my grandchil- dren. Should I walk? — Not So Lucky in Kentucky Dear Not Lucky: The dangers of secondhand smoke are well documented, and anyone who refuses to admit the risks is in deep denial. Your husband is addicted to tobacco and may be unable to give it up without assistance. Sug- gest he speak to his doctor and also look into smokefree.gov for tips. Until then, insist he smoke outside the home. If he is unwill- ing to make the effort to protect your health and that of your chil- dren, you should ask him to leave. Dear Annie: Why do you try to find a reason (sleep apnea, low testosterone, etc.) for a man’s low sex drive? Let’s be honest. It’s called getting older. Do you seri- ously expect men who are 50, 60 and older to have the same sex drive they did when they were in their 20s? You are denying the facts of life. As we get older, our repro- ductive years are behind us. Quit trying to pump a sex drive into this guy with shots, pills or counseling. It’s unnatural. — Realist Dear Realist: While testos- terone levels decline as men age, there is nothing natural about a 50- year-old man losing his sex drive entirely. Low testosterone can cause depression, infertility, hair loss, osteoporosis, decreased mus- cle mass, fatigue and sleep distur- bances. These are medical issues that can be helped with appropri- ate treatment. Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. Film industry frets over planned California state park closures LOS ANGELES (MCT) — More than a dozen California state parks that have been a rich source of filming for such classic Holly- wood movies as "High Noon," George Lucas' "Star Wars" sequel "Return of the Jedi" and Steven Spielberg's "Back to the Future III," are in danger of going dark. They are among 70 state parks, historic sites and recreation areas — or 25 percent of the 278 parks nation- wide — that Gov. Jerry Brown has proposed closing in response to the state's budget crisis. The planned closings, which are part of the $33 million in park cuts approved by the Legis- lature this year, are like- ly to be the subject of intense upcoming bud- get negotiations in Sacramento. Brown's administration says the cuts, which would take effect July 1, are neces- sary to balance the state's budget. The prospect of los- ing so many state parks is cause for concern among location man- agers and film promot- ers, who fear that such drastic cuts could give producers one more rea- son to take their busi- ness out of California. The timing is bad for the state, which has been working to keep more productions from leaving. California may not have the most generous film tax credit, but what Look for Inspiration in our Artistic Displays Red Bluff Garden Center 766 Antelope Blvd. (next to the fairgrounds) 527-0886 it does have, apart from experienced crews and sunny weather, is an abundance of parks with diverse landscapes that have long served as ready-made locations for producers of films, TV shows and commer- cials, film industry offi- cials say. "This is going to be very problematic for location managers," said Veronique Vowell, chairwoman of the gov- ernment affairs commit- tee for the Location Managers Guild of America. "The parks are hugely important to us. They are relatively low- cost, ready-made back lots that can represent all different places around the country. You've got deserts to alpine forests and beaches." Vowell said that once parks close, it is not clear whether filmmak- ers will still have access to the locations, how they would secure per- mits to shoot and how well maintained the sites would be. Parks remain hugely popular for filming. In 2009, nearly 500 per- mits were issued for nearly 1,000 days of shooting in state parks for such productions as "Iron Man 2" and "I Love You, Man." For that reason, the Location Managers Guild last year lobbied in support of an unsuc- cessful ballot initiative that would have required Californians to pay an extra $18 as part of their annual vehicle registration fee in exchange for eliminat- ing day-pass fees at state parks. A spokesperson for Gov. Brown's office was unavailable for com- ment. The parks slated for closure include the Salton Sea State Recre- ation Area; Palomar Mountain State Park in San Diego; Fort Tejon State Historic Park in Kern County; Grizzly Creek Redwoods, seen in George Lucas' "Star Wars" sequel "Return of the Jedi"; and Railtown 1897 State Historic Park, which hosted the classic movies "High Noon" and "Back to the Future." The busiest parks for “Art In The Garden” June 4th & 5th filming in Los Angeles County, such as Malibu Creek and Leo Carrillo, aren't on the closure list, but the cuts would phase out half a dozen less-used parks in the region that have long histories of filming, including McGrath State Beach in Oxnard; the Santa Susana Pass near Simi Valley, famously depicted in Alfred Hitchcock's clas- sic "North by North- west"; and Saddleback Butte State Park east of Lancaster, which was featured in "There Will Be Blood," starring Academy Award winner Daniel Day-Lewis. "These are historic film locations that are in jeopardy and should never be considered for closure," said author Harry Medved, who conducts film history tours, including an upcoming one of Mal- ibu Creek State Park. "The parks are vital to the film industry." Thank twice about Ketamine treatment DEAR DR. GOTT: I was compelled to respond to the letter from a 39-year-old mother with RSD who was contemplat- ing Ketamine infu- sion. I, too, have suf- fered with RSD for almost 25 years. I was involved in an acci- dent in 1986 where someone ran a stop sign and turned head-on into my car. The accident did not appear major, but the effects were. I went through several series of spinal injections and many other treatments with a vari- ety of doctors. I would like to share what I discovered helps me. RSD usually responds to temperature. For me, heat has greatly improved my life. My husband and I moved from New Jersey to southwest Florida fewer than two years ago for the sake of my health, and it made a significant differ- ence. I found that aqua-aer- obics are also important in improving my health, so having a salt pool in my backyard is a godsend. As for medication, I’ve been taking Ultram (100 milligrams twice a day) and 50 milligrams of Nucynta (a newer medication that has a narcotic and an analgesic). Every week or so, I switch from the Nucynta to a Fen- tanyl patch, which lasts for three days, or one Vicodin a day. This has finally kept the pain under control. I do have to take a nap every day to recharge my batteries. The only thing I have heard about the Ketamine treatment involves being put into a coma for a week. She needs to do some research about the subject before considering it as an alternative. There are many of us RSD sufferers out there, and doctors need to be edu- cated about it. So very few really understand its com- plexities, and misdiagnoses are common. After 25 years, I feel somewhat like an “expert”! DEAR READER: I have previously written about RSD/CRPS (Reflex Sym- pathetic Dystrophy/Com- plex Regional Pain Syn- drome). Those interested in reading the articles can find them on my website at www.AskDrGottMD.com/r sd-helped-by-hydrotherapy/ and www.AskDrGottMD.com/r sd-chronic-pain/. Ketamine infusion has three main techniques. Two are approved in the United States, and the third is not. I will start with the third, because it is the type you mentioned. It involves Dr. Peter Gott putting the patient into a coma for five to seven days, dur- ing which high doses of Keta- mine are given intravenously. It is available out- side the United States, but it is expensive, not to mention the cost of travel, etc. More research on this method is necessary. The following two tech- niques are allowable in the United States. The first is an outpatient procedure of low-dose Ketamine infu- sion. Each patient is differ- ent, but I will describe what is considered to be a fairly typical experience. Repeat- ed infusions are done over a period of days, weeks and months. Each infusion lasts between four and six hours. The first two weeks often involve daily infusions. This regimen is then tapered down to two treat- ments every other week for four weeks, followed by one treatment every other week for four to eight weeks. Finally, a mainte- nance infusion is given once or twice every three months. The final option is low- dose in-hospital infusion. This treatment is given with a combination of Ketamine and clonidine. Daily infu- sions are typically given over a five-day period. Ketamine infusions are recommended only for RSD/CRPS sufferers who don’t achieve adequate pain relief through other meth- ods. You are definitely cor- rect that anyone considering this option needs to do plen- ty of research, including picking the right physician and hospital/clinic to per- form the procedure, deter- mining the cost, finding if the procedure is covered by insurance and more. I recommend anyone interested in learning more about this condition visit the American RSDHope web- site at www.RSDHope.org. It is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization started by an RSD sufferer and his fami- ly. You can also find more information on www.May- oClinic.com, as well. Dr. Peter H. Gott is a retired physician and the author of several books, including “Live Longer, Live Better,” “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Diet” and “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Cookbook,” which are available at most bookstores or online. His website is www.AskDrGottMD.com.