Issue link: http://www.epageflip.net/i/785733
DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman THEDUPLEX GlennMcCoy ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARAMY»Myhusband and partner (we were a same-sex couple) of 39 years recently died. We live on the West Coast and his entire family (mother, brother, sisters, nieces, nephews, aunt, uncles) lives on the East Coast. I have no fam- ily. He left his child- hood home 50 years ago, so he hardly lived with his brother and sister. For all these years we flew back for wed- dings and family gath- erings, sent money for graduations, birthdays, etc., and met with all his family many times. Every- one acted friendly. His brother and sister flew to our home one month before his pass- ing and claim I was cold, distant and rude to them. I didn't see it that way, but I apologized. It has been a month since his passing, and not one family member has reached out to me. My brother-in-law suggested that the immediate family does not need to send condolences or thank me for taking care of their brother. He further said that other family mem- bers would not know what to say. He even said that I was simply "out of sight ... out of mind." My hope was that by reaching out to me, his family would acknowl- edge a life well-lived. I am not looking for sympathy; but this has me confused about their true feelings about our life together. His brother and sister told me they will not at- tend his memorial service on the West Coast. Am I missing some- thing here? I am trying to understand. —Saddenedonthe Left Coast DEAR SADDENED » Your brother-in-law has a very weak point, in that im- mediate family members (who are presumably grieving), might not feel the need to reach out to you in sympathy. This theory only works, how- ever, if you have all seen one another after your loved one's death and expressed your mutual condolences personally. In this case, of course, they should contact you, and the fact that they haven't makes it sound as if they wrote off their brother years ago. Their inattention is rude and hurtful. ("Not knowing what to say" is no excuse.) You and your husband seem to have tried to maintain a relationship with these family mem- bers over the years. The family's collective behav- ior now illustrates why he left his home 50 years ag o , an d wh y he w as s o lucky to have you. DEAR AMY » I liked your advice to "At a Loss," who wanted to exclude her mother from her own wedding. I had an identical experience and handled it exactly as you suggested, by assigning a friend to basically monitor my mother at the wedding, and be prepared to escort her home, if necessary. Everything worked out fine! — Been There DEAR BEEN THERE » No solution is guaranteed, but I'm happy this worked for you. Grieving husband deserves sympathy from his in-laws You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson. com and follow her on Twitter @askingamy. Amy Dickinson Ask Amy Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Aquarius(Jan.20-Feb.19) — Physical activity will make you feel good, and the compli- ments you receive will boost your ego. Your confidence will soar. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — Do what you can, but don't allow anyone to coerce you into taking part in something that is futile. Weigh the pros and cons, and cut your losses. Aries (March 21-April 19) — Greater involvement with institutions or people who can offer information, knowledge and support will lead to partner- ship opportunities. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — Live and learn. Sign up for a lecture or retreat that will open your mind to a host of new ideas or ways to move forward. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — Someone is likely to mislead you, try to cover up his or her feelings or obscure what's really happening. Dig deep and get the facts before making a commitment. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — Delve into learning about dif- ferent cultures or get involved in a group that offers greater self- awareness. Taking time out to enjoy life or to be with someone you love is favored. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — Don't let money matters confuse you. When in doubt, put your credit cards in a safe place and choose not to spend. A physical challenge will be invigorating. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — Disillusionment will set in if you aren't willing to recog- nize that trouble is brewing at home or with someone you are close to. Be prepared to deter problems. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — Opportunity will knock, so don't be lazy or uninterested. Step up and get in the game. Whether dealing with personal or busi- ness matters, you stand to gain if you get involved. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — Oversee any task you are responsible for at home or work. Giving someone else authority to make decisions for you will result in an emotional encounter. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — Don't get involved in joint ventures or let anyone sway you in a direction that is sketchy or risky. Trust in your judgment, not in someone else's rhetoric. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — Don't get pushy, or someone will push back. Stick your money in a safe place and say no to joint ventures. Time is on your side, and keeping the peace is encouraged. Horoscope By Eugenia Last SATURDAY, FEB. 11 | YOURDAILYBREAK | REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 11, 2017 8 B