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DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman GETFUZZY DarbyConley ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARAMY»Mygrown son (32) has chosen to not speak to me for the past five years. We live in the same town. He is a police officer (a profession I encouraged for him) and the oldest of four. He has always been treated like the "golden child." His mother and I divorced when he was 15, and in the 15 years between the divorce and my subsequent remarriage, my behavior when sev- eral interim relationships failed was somewhat less than honorable (although never violent). He found out about several of my stalking behaviors and brief jail- ings, and eventually he told me to my face that he was never going to speak to me again. I am now married to a wonderful woman, and we have a success- ful, happy, fulfilling life. Those behaviors are now long behind me. I am close with my other children, but everybody (including my ex-wife) is uncomfortable whenever I ask about my oldest son. They refuse to do any- thing to help ameliorate this ugly situation. My current wife is will- ing to support me in any choice I make, but she sees him to be very cold, stubborn, rectilinear and immovable — the perfect cop, in many ways. Advice? —Father-in-Loss DEAR FATHER » Y our son confronted you in person about the consequences of your volatile behavior of many years' duration. You describe your son as being judgmental and rigid. He might be more like you than you are will- ing to admit. All of your complaints rest on your feeling of primacy as the father of the family. If your household broke apart when this boy was 15, and you spent the next 15 years flipping out, stalking women and get- ting occasional jail time, your son likely took on at least some of the father- ing you missed. Drop your own guard and face this with a level of compassion for the tough guy who might still be an angry boy at heart. DEAR AMY » I have been guilty of exhibiting sud- den anger, but for some strange reason when I am driving and other drivers exhibit dangerous driving and are impolite, rude or driving erratically, I have no difficulty ignoring the bad behavior and politely allowing them to abuse their driving privilege. I arrive at my destination cool, calm, collected and very much alive. Why do you think I react this way when I am a hothea d in other situations? — Cool Driver DEAR COOL » Most of us behave in a way that is within our own particular comfort zone. You are a hothead in situations where you have some cer- tainty that you can safely survive the impact of your own behavior. You obviously value your own life enough to suppress whatever urge you might. The next step is to see if you can apply these to the rest of your life. Father seeks to reunite with estranged son after divorce You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribune.com and follow her on Twitter @askingamy. Amy Dickinson Ask Amy Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Libra(Sept.23-Oct.23) — Negotiations will provide enlightening information. Share your ideas with as many people as possible. Be ready to quickly move forward. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — You'll be faced with a sub- stantial change, making it vital that you get all the facts before making a decision. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — Your future should take precedence over other people's plans. Deal with established professionals when researching the vocation you are aiming for. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — A nonproductive cycle must be changed. Get the ball rolling. Do whatever it takes to get mo- tivated. No one is going to give you a free ride. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Move on to a more mean- ingful relationship phase with friends, relatives or a lover. A deeper bond is possible if you are truthful and build a union based on trust. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — Size up why you are feeling at odds with your current situa- tion. It's time to take control of what's important and walk away from what isn't. Home improve- ments will be beneficial. Aries (March 21-April 19) — You will be tempted by a unique offer. Get together with the most interesting people you know and make plans to have an adventurous outing. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — You will obtain good results with sensible food choices and a sound exercise routine. Local farmers' markets and health- food stores offer diverse options to improve your diet. Overindul- gence should be avoided. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — If you shake things up, improve your appearance or enhance your image, your confidence will go up as well. Get involved in something new, exciting and thought-provoking. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — You can expect to exper- ience worry or concern regar- ding children and loved ones. Do your best to keep the peace at home and avoid criticizing others. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — Minor strife at home will blow over soon. You should be happy with the way other situations are developing around you. Don't let anyone back you into a corner. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — Ask old friends questions that will help you get a clearer picture of the way you are perceived by others. Recalling old dreams will lead to a new destination. Horoscope By Eugenia Last WEDNESDAY, OCT. 22 WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 22, 2014 REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM |YOURDAILYBREAK | 3 B