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4B Daily News – Saturday, December 31, 2011 FEATURES Girlfriend gives guilt, gonorrhea Dear Annie: I am a 60-year-old man, and I'm in a 10-month relation- ship with a beauti- ful young woman of 63. A terrible thing happened. An ex- girlfriend I briefly dated years ago stopped by my house to repay some money I loaned her. She brought some beer, and we chatted. Unfortunately, I had taken a sleep aid shortly before she showed up, and I fell asleep. I woke up having sex with her. It took a few moments to get my senses back, but then I told her to leave. Annie's Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar I put off telling my girlfriend, because she was tired after having had foot surgery. But it turns out the old girlfriend gave me gonorrhea. It was so disgusting. I then needed to tell my girlfriend. Now, of course, she wants nothing to do with me. I know I made a huge mistake by letting the ex get comfortable in my house. I have no idea what to do. Please help me. — Broken Dear Broken: There is some evi- dence that certain sleep aids can cause such ''sleep-walking'' problems when the opportunities present themselves. You apparently didn't make a con- scious decision to cheat on your girl- friend, and your job now is to convince her of that. This will involve flowers and apologies along with declarations of undying love and devotion. We can't promise it will work, but we hope she will give you another chance. Dear Annie: I've been married for 18 years to the most wonderful man. It was obvious from the beginning that my sex drive was much higher than his. He was fine being intimate once every two months, and I preferred twice a week. I learned to tolerate the frustration. At 38, I work full time, have a tod- dler and a 5-year-old and am often exhausted, and my sex drive has final- ly fallen through the floor. The kicker? A year ago, my husband had surgery to remove a large hernia in his groin that he'd had for years but was afraid to get checked out. Following his surgery, his sex drive went through the roof. Now he's the Energizer Bunny. Where was this enthusiasm when we were 20? It's causing problems in our mar- riage, as I resent the fact that I was expected to tolerate my frustration, but he has trouble doing likewise. I'm sure we'll work it out, as we always do, but part of me would really like to go back to his doctor and say, ''Can't you please return just a little bit of his her- nia?'' So, men, if you think you may have a medical problem, please check it out sooner rather than later. And, women, be careful what you wish for. — Sex Drive Mismatch Dear Mismatch: Right now, your husband is delighted to be at full throt- tle and wants to enjoy it. There is a good possibility that your sex drive will return when you are less exhaust- ed, and perhaps your husband will develop another hernia when you hit menopause (just kidding). But we're glad you are confident that you will work this out. That's what happens in a good marriage. Dear Annie: I read the letter from ''Not a NASCAR Fan'' and could sympathize. I met my husband when my daughter was a year old, and he also drove recklessly. After patiently explaining many times how uncom- fortable it was for me, I finally told him that if he wanted us to accompany him anywhere, I would be the one to drive. Thankfully, he didn't put up too much of a fuss, and after 18 years, he finally heard me. There hasn't been a worry since. — Massachusetts Dear Massachusetts: Not all men are willing to cede driving responsibil- ities to someone else. Good for you. Annie's Snippet for New Year's Eve (Credit Bill Vaughn): Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to. Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. The 10 best movies of 2011 BY RENE RODRIGUEZ McClatchy Newspapers How bad of a year was it for movies? As late as August, I was wondering if there would be enough films to fill a 10- best list. Then came the fall movie season and everything changed. Overall, 2011 will be remembered as a mediocre year for cinema. But the bright spots burned really, really bright. Here is a list of the 10 best films I saw this year: 1. "Moneyball": Director Bennett Miller used the fact- based of story of Billy Beane, the Oakland A's manager who thought outside the box, to illustrate the ways in which every conceivable industry has been forced to transform to survive in the brave new online world. The script, written by the for- midable duo of Aaron Sorkin and Steven Zaillian, made dry subject matter such as budgetary constraints and salary negotiations utterly absorbing, and the performances by Brad Pitt as Beane and Jonah Hill as the young statistician who becomes his advisor brought humor and warmth to what should have been a somewhat dull movie. Instead, "Moneyball" was funny, thrilling, illuminating and affecting. Like the best sports movies, it transcended its genre to become a resonant commentary on contemporary culture. (A bonus: Some of the most exciting baseball games I've ever seen in a film, and baseball usually puts me to sleep.) 2. "Melancholia": Lars von Trier's first film born out of his bout with depression, 2009's "Antichrist," was an inti- mate study of a married couple mourning their dead son who did horrific, unwatchable things to each other. "Melancho- lia" is also about depression, and it, too, centers on two char- acters, sisters (Kirsten Dunst and Charlotte Gainsbourg) struggling to understand each other and often failing. But von Trier's scope this time was cosmic, with a planet on a collision course with Earth hurtling closer. With apologies to T. S. Eliot: This is the way the world ends — not with a whimper but a colossal, mind-blowing bang. 3. "A Separation": This deceptively simple drama from Iranian writer-director Asghar Fardahi, about the conse- quences following a married couple's legal separation, is nothing less than a miracle — a movie that holds its own with literature of the highest order, and an uncommonly wise and empathetic study of familial bonds and the great pain we can inadvertently cause to the people we love the most. The fact that the movie doubles as a commentary on the rules and mores of modern-day Iranian society is a bonus. A bonafide masterpiece. (Opens Jan. 27) 4. "The Tree of Life": The most audacious — and beau- tiful _ movie of the year, the story of a family in 1950s Texas seen primarily through the eyes of three brothers. Director Terrence Malick captures the essence of childhood — the sights and sounds and memories and feelings — like no other filmmaker before, but his vision is expansive enough to include a flashback to the Big Bang, conversations with God and an interlude involving dinosaurs. The movie grap- ples with big themes in a daringly poetic manner, including how the ideologies of our parents are permanently imprint- ed on us, sometimes for the worst. The film is probably too ambitious — this is the rare kind of picture where you wish Sean Penn's performance had been cut out of the movie entirely — but despite its flaws, "The Tree of Life" is a mon- umental achievement. Even if you hate it, you won't be able to stop talking about it. 5. "War Horse": Steven Spielberg's epic about the bond between a boy and his horse is a distillation of all the quali- ties that make him one of the all-time great filmmakers: A sweeping vision, earnest emotion, astounding action sequences, a profound love of cinema, a masterful command of camera and framing, and a narrative that uses historical events to illustrate the impact of war on ordinary people. The most common criticism being leveled at the movie is that it is too saccharine and schmaltzy. But it would take an awful- ly stony heart not to moved by this tale about the ways ani- mals impact our lives. Not everyone is going to like "War Horse." But if you hate this film, you probably hate movies, too. Sorry. 6. "Martha Marcy May Marlene": Sean Durkin's psy- chology study of a young woman (Elizabeth Olsen) trying to readjust to the real world after fleeing a creepy cult was the most impressive directorial debut of the year — a precise, hypnotic and hallucinatory thriller that gradually builds an enormous aura of dread and terror, then pays off in an com- pletely unpredictable manner. The final scene alone proves Durkin is a major talent to watch. 7. "The Interrupters": "Hoop Dreams" director Steve James returned with this superb documentary about a year in the lives of a group of social activists and former gang mem- bers trying to stop the perpetual cycle of crime, drugs and violence afflicting an urban neighborhood in Chicago. As engrossing and heartbreaking as a feature film, only every- thing in this one is true. 8. "Poetry": South Korean director Lee Chang-dong's sublime, heartrending drama about a woman (played by the amazing Yun Jung-hee) with early-onset Alzheimer's who enrolls in a poetry-writing class is both a clear-eyed lamen- tation on the potential for evil we all harbor and the over- whelming beauty of the world around us. 9. "I Saw the Devil": David Fincher's The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo may have gotten all the attention. But the year's best revenge drama — as well as the most inventive and original and startling — is Kim Jee-woon's relentless thriller about a police officer who tracks down the serial killer who murdered his pregnant girlfriend. But instead of executing the monster, the cop decides to exact prolonged, horrific revenge. Sometimes, in the name of justice, we come exactly what we're trying fighting against. 10. "Drive": The coolest, funniest, most exciting genre picture of the year, with Ryan Gosling as a stoic driver, Albert Brooks as a murderous mob boss and Carey Mulli- gan as a mother in peril. A towering feat of mood, ambience and imaginative direction by Nicolas Winding Refn, who constantly surprised you with sudden shifts in tone. Shop Local This Christmas Spring Blooming Bulbs 50% off Red Bluff Garden Center 527-0886 766 Antelope Blvd. (Next to the Fairground) Show someone you really care by giving them Better Health and Happiness This Christmas! With a gift certificate from Premier Fitness Facility Tehama County's Fish and shellfish allergies can appear later in life Q: I'm in my mid-30s and I've never had food aller- gies. But lately I've been get- ting symptoms that seem like an allergic reaction after I eat shellfish — itchiness and swollen lips. I offensive against it. Mol- ecules that provoke such reactions are called aller- gens. The immune system's Dr. K by Anthony L. Komaroff, M.D. thought food allergies appeared in childhood or not at all, but I'm starting to question this. Is it possible for me to develop a food allergy as an adult? A: Contrary to what you (and many others) assume about food allergies, they can actually crop up without warning at any time of life. So even if you didn't have a food allergy during child- hood, you're not necessarily off the hook. That said, food allergies don't rank high on the list of later-life maladies. Only 4 percent of adults are allergic to a food, and even young- sters who have the most common food allergies — to milk, eggs, wheat and soy — are likely to outgrow them by the time they enter kindergarten. Yet no adult is truly immune to food allergy. Some food allergies — especially to peanuts, tree nuts (which include almonds, cashews and wal- nuts), fish and shellfish — persist from childhood. But adults can also be waylaid by allergic reactions to foods they've enjoyed all their lives. Moreover, a food allergy that first rears its head in adulthood isn't like- ly to go away. Experts have two expla- nations for food allergies that develop in adulthood. They may be the result of a delayed or extended period of sensitization to an aller- gen, or they may reflect a cross-reaction to some other allergen, such as pollen. Not all bad reactions to food are food allergies. Lac- tose intolerance, for exam- ple, is not an allergic reac- tion, but rather an inability to digest the sugar in milk and other dairy products because of a deficiency of lactase, the enzyme that breaks down milk sugar (lactose) so it can be digest- ed. Food allergies represent a Tehama Family Fitness Center 2498 South Main St • Red Bluff 528-8656 www.tehamafamilyfitness.com failure of the collaboration between the digestive and the immune systems. When you eat, your digestive sys- tem breaks down the food into its molecular compo- nents. The first time you digest a food, your immune system examines the food's array of molecules. If your immune system decides that these molecules do not pose a threat, it gives them the equivalent of a passport to your body through a process known as oral tolerance. A food you're allergic to gets rougher treatment. For some unknown reason, the immune system misidenti- fies a food molecule as harmful and initiates an two principal players in an allergic reaction are IgE antibodies and mast cells, which cluster in tis- sues that line the portals to the body — the skin, airways and digestive system. IgE antibodies are produced to snare a par- ticular allergen. They dock onto receptors on mast cells where they lie in wait for the allergen to appear — a process known as sensitiza- tion. Once sensitized, the immune system is ready to pounce next time the aller- gen shows up. When an IgE antibody that is docked on a mast cell snags an allergen, the cell releases histamine and other compounds. The surge of chemicals can cause a variety of reactions, including sneezing, a runny nose, itchy eyes, rashes, hives and wheezing. If histamines are released throughout the body, more serious problems may develop. The airways may constrict. Nausea, vomiting and diarrhea can follow. And blood pressure may plummet, leading to loss of consciousness and the uncommon but life-threat- ening situation known as anaphylaxis. You usually know you're allergic to a food within minutes of eating it. The reaction may range from a mild response — such as itching or swelling around the mouth — to anaphylax- is. But it's also unpre- dictable: A person who is allergic to a food may have a mild reaction one time and full-blown anaphylaxis the next. Fish and shellfish aller- gies are the most common serious adult-onset food allergies. Some researchers speculate that fish allergies have a late onset because many people don't eat much fish until they grow up, so they become sensitized to it later. Others scientists who study cross-reactivity between fish and other aller- gens have found that people who are allergic to lobster, shrimp and other shellfish are also allergic to house mites and cockroaches. The principal suspected allergen is a protein called tropomyosin, which is shared by crustaceans, mol- lusks, roaches and mites. If you have a food aller- gy, you'll have to plan your meals with care so you can avoid exposure to the culprit allergen. In your case, that means crossing shellfish off your menu. And people who are at risk for severe reac- tions should have an EpiPen with them so they can give themselves a shot of epi- nephrine to fight back against the reaction. It may seem complicated at first, but with a little care your meals will be both tasty and safe.