Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
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8 FEBRUARY 11 - 17, 2015 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM Do you enjoy living dangerously? Then get your medical advice from Internet trolls and politicians. Having your kid vaccinated is so late 20th century. Kids today are so coddled. Let them be toughened up by being infected with measles, mumps or whooping cough. No sissies needed. Bring back polio and small pox in the name of personal freedom. Welcome to the Brave New World of the Anti-Vaxxers as promoted by the Internet. The Anti-Vaxxer's Dark Lord is Andy Wakefield, the Birther of the anti-vaccination movement. Dr. Chris Christie is his prophet. Once upon a time, Wakefield wrote an article in Lancet, a usually careful medical journal, linking vaccines with autism. Wakefields's findings have now been repudiated as false. The Lancet withdrew Wakefield's article but the smell lingers on. Once something putrid hits the Internet it remains forever. Now, the really cool parents are refusing to have their kids vaccinated because the Internet tells them it's a one way street to autism. Our little friend, Virginia, found out that there is a Santa Claus because her daddy told her if you read it in the New York Sun, it must be so. Now, if you read it on the Internet, it must be so. The Internet has pronounced that vaccination equals autism. Facts are not needed if you believe hard enough. As George Costanza pointed out when he was trying to help Seinfeld beat a lie detector test, "If you believe it, it's not a lie." The Anti-Vaxxers believe. No amount of science will convince them otherwise. One of my favorite sections of Disneyland is Main Street USA, which transports us back to Walt Disney's childhood at the beginning of the 20th century. Disney's Main Street reminds us of the carefree time before vaccines and evil scientists in white coats invaded America. We didn't need any vaccines back then. Children were free then to enjoy measles, mumps, chicken pox, polio and whooping cough. It seems only fitting that our current outbreak of measles comes from Disneyland — retro diseases from the retro happiest petri dish on Earth. Remember when we were all going to die from Ebola? That was so last year. The much maligned Center for Disease Control & Prevention handled Ebola well despite the "sky is falling" talking heads on TV. The CDC has reported that there are no credible studies that show that vaccines are linked to autism. The CDC was right about Ebola and is right about getting kids vaccinated against measles, mumps and rubella. Science be darned, the Anti-Vaxxers will never surrender their medical beliefs no matter how many children get sick. Way back in the dark ages when I was in public school, they wouldn't let you into school without having your shots up to date. That seemed to work well. Now in some states, a parent can sign a "personal belief exemption" form and their child can come to school without vaccinations. Having a "personal belief exemption" from medical science sounds very similar to buying indulgences from the Church in the Middle Ages. Parents can send their vaccine free but measles infected kids to school because of their personal belief in liberty. This attitude might seem a bit selfish to worry warts who are concerned about the return of previously banished childhood diseases. Too bad. My child's freedom to infect outweighs your kid's right to be healthy. The Anti-Vaxxers have a political champion in Presidential candidate Christie, who recently defended the choice of parents not to vaccinate their kids against measles. Dr. Christie is a noted medical doctor, public health specialist and immunologist. If Dr. Christie says it, then I believe it, and that settles it. Vaccines are bad. Personal freedom to infect others is guaranteed in the Constitution. Free Typhoid Mary. I would like to get a "personal belief exemption" license that would let me drive as fast as I like, not pay taxes, shout fire in a crowded theater and go to the front of any line because I don't believe in waiting in line. The kids that go to the Happy Hunting Ground as a result of the Anti-Vaxxer's stand for personal freedom just weren't tough enough. Natural selection works. Darn the skin lesions, full steam ahead. Vaccinations are for sheeple. Free the Measles! by PITT DICKEY PITT DICKEY, Contributing Writer. COMMENTS? Editor@upandcomin- gweekly.com. Fine Arts Gallery Where Fayetteville goes to find: Original Art • Gallery Exhibitions Year-round Workshops/Classes Commissions • Tours (910) 433-2986 148-1 Maxwell Street • Fayetteville, NC 28301 www.capefearstudios.com