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Wednesday, April 4, 2012 – Daily News FEATURES Disabled in-laws strain couple's marriage Dear Annie: I'm writ- ing this from a friend's computer so my wife won't find out. ''Lizzie'' and I are in our late 20s. She has an older sister and two adopt- ed siblings, both of whom are developmentally dis- abled. One has Down syn- drome, but he is capable of living independently. The other, however, is the size of a grown woman, but she can neither walk nor speak. She must be cared for like an infant. A therapist told me I have to decide for myself. Please help. — Need Another Opinion will make our lives hell. What's our next step? — It's No Fun Here Dear No Fun: If you cannot get Annie's Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar When we married, Lizzie told me that someday her adoptive sib- lings would live in a group home. Now that her mother is in poor health, she says she intends to have both of them live with us. Lizzie's biological sister is mar- ried with kids and acts as if her adoptive siblings don't exist. I asked my sister-in-law if she and her husband would take in the developmentally disabled sister, and she said no. When I asked why she was so cold toward her adoptive sib- lings, she said, ''They were my par- ents' project, not mine.'' So now I'm stuck. I want kids of our own, but it will be impossible to care for an infant and a ''grown infant'' at the same time, and even Lizzie agrees. And if we place the siblings in a home, we'll still have to help pay for it, and her parents didn't provide much. There's no way we could afford it. I love my wife, but there are some things I am not willing to do. contribute financially to their care. Also, please check online or call 211 to find local support groups for caregivers of those with develop- mental disabilities and see what resources exist in your area. Armed with good information, you can then discuss it honestly and com- passionately with Lizzie. Dear Annie: I have a co-worker who constantly yells at everyone. She gossips and complains about other co-workers all the time. When someone makes a mistake, she makes fun of them. A few people have quit because of her. Customers have complained about her rude- ness and how she screams at her co- workers. We have brought this up to our boss and his supervisor, but they say, ''Well, that's just how she is.'' I'm tired of it, and so is everyone else. But when I tried to get people to register a complaint as a group, no one would man up because they are all afraid the co-worker will find out. Then, if nothing happens, she Dear Need: This is an enormous responsibility, and we understand it's not what you signed up for. Before rejecting both the obligation and your mar- riage, however, please do some research. The siblings may be eligible for govern- ment assistance. Your sister- in-law may be willing to the office staff to register a group complaint and management refuses to intervene, your choice is to put up with this annoying co-worker or leave. We are surprised the bosses don't care if good employees quit and clients complain, but if that's their position, there's not much recourse unless you can go directly to the owner of the company. We recommend it. Dear Annie: ''Mad in Omaha'' should report her niece and nephew to the police. They have committed felonies by pawning Grandma's jewelry and forging her name to steal money from her bank account to pay for drugs. She also needs to advise the police that Grandma is afraid of these people and may be being abused in other ways. Making a police report is the best way to pro- tect Grandma and also get these young criminals under the supervi- sion of a criminal justice agency that will make them get treatment for their addiction and, hopefully, become responsible citizens. — A Probation Officer Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. Smart Start teen driving class Thursday The statistics are sober- ing: A teenager is more likely to die during their first year of driving than any other year of life. In the United States, the crash rate per mile driven for 16-19 year-olds is 4 times that of older drivers. Risk is highest at age 16. According to a study by the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety, the crash rate per mile driven is twice as high for 16 year-olds as it is for 18-19 year-olds, Lieutenant Todd Garr, commander of the Red Bluff Area CHP office, said. hard to keep our young dri- vers safe, but there is more we can do," Garr said. "Studies have shown that the biggest influence on teen drivers is the attitude and guidance of their par- ents. We need parents to "We are all working ensure they are teaching their kids the cold hard facts about driving and the incredible responsibility it places on their shoulders." The Start Smart class can help parents do this, Garr said. "I have been in Tehama County for a lot of years and have watched a lot of kids grow from toddlers to adults," Sheriff Dave Hencratt said. "Knowing I have helped keep these kids safe has been one of the most satis- fying parts of my career in law enforcement." The Sheriff's Depart- ment has been helping teach the Start Smart pro- gram, which helps educate youth and their parents on just how easy it is to die behind the wheel of a car or to be responsible for the death of a friend, for almost two years. Tehama County knowledge will help keep our children safe during a very dangerous time of their lives," Hencratt said. On April 5, the Tehama County Sheriff's Office and the California High- way Patrol are sponsoring a free "Start Smart" class for new drivers at the Sheriff Department Office, 22840 Antelope Blvd. "Start Smart" classes help edu- cate new teenage drivers and their parents on what can kill teens at the start of their driving careers. It also provides teaching tech- niques and intervention tactic ideas to parents. "By educating teens and their parents together, we provide a starting point and ideas for parents to best mold young drivers into safe drivers," Garr said. "A one-time class helps, but teens need consistent fol- "It is our hope that this low-up and guidance from people who care and are personally involved in their driving career." Topics of discussion include the responsibilities of driving a motor vehicle, the primary cause of acci- dents, seat belt use, cell phone and texting laws and provisional license laws pertaining to young dri- vers. Interspersed throughout the class are real life expe- riences and stories shared by officers that help drive home the overarching theme of the class: driving is a serious responsibility and must be treated as such. The class will be 6-8 p.m. Thursday. Young dri- vers attending should be accompanied by a parent or guardian. Those interested can call Red Bluff CHP at 527-2034 to reserve a spot. TOR K: I've recently become lactose-intolerant. Is there a treat- ment for this? Or do I have to say goodbye to cheese and milkshakes forever? DEAR DOC- ER: Yes, there is a treatment. But whether it will allow you to eat cheese and drink milkshakes occasionally depends on your gut. Lactose intolerance occurs when your gut does not have enough of an enzyme called lactase. Lactase breaks down lac- tose, the main sugar in milk. When lactose isn't properly broken down, it can cause abdominal cramping, bloating, gas and diarrhea. DEAR READ- ways to treat lactose intol- erance. The first option is to reduce the amount of lactose you eat by limiting milk and dairy products. You'll need to read labels of all prepared foods to see if they con- tain lactose. Milk and ice cream contain the most lactose. (Interestingly, ice cream tends to be tolerat- ed better than other foods that contain lactose.) Cheeses typically have lower amounts of lactose. Some products listed as "nondairy" may contain lactose if they have ingre- dients that are derived from milk. These include powdered coffee creamer and whipped toppings. Look for words on food labels such as whey, curds, milk byproducts, dry milk solids and nonfat dry milk powder. If any of these ingredients are list- ed, the product probably contains lactose. There are two main avoid lactose, your symp- toms should go away. But of course you're not inter- ested in completely avoid- ing cheeses or milkshakes. Nor would I be, if I were you. If you completely 3B 2 strategies for lactose intolerance Dr. K by Anthony L. Komaroff, M.D. symptoms significantly, although it rarely gets rid of symptoms completely. Many of my patients on lactase replacement tell me they are willing to tol- erate the much milder symptoms they do get. Pretreated dairy prod- ucts are an effective alter- native. You can purchase dairy products that have already been treated to reduce the lactose ("lac- tose-free" milk, for exam- ple). or pills. They replace at least some of what your gut isn't making. For example, you can add lactase drops to milk and then refrigerate the milk for 24 hours before use. Lactase replacement can reduce your But before you elimi- nate dairy products or turn to enzyme tablets, make sure that you really are lactose-intolerant. Similar symptoms can be caused by fructose, sorbitol or other sugars that are not easily digested. Your doctor can do testing for lactase defi- ciency. When you swal- low lactose, do you devel- op symptoms? Does your blood sugar go up a lot? If it does, that means you are not deficient in lac- tase: The enzyme has bro- ken down the lactose to the simple sugars mea- sured in the blood. Does the hydrogen in your breath go up a lot? If so, you've got lactase defi- ciency. The easiest way to check — and to avoid a visit to the doctor — is to try a lactose-free diet for a week or two. If your symptoms improve dra- matically, you're probably lactose-intolerant. You can get the lactase treat- ment without a prescrip- tion. Who needs doctors? (Did I say that?) Dr. Komaroff is a So the second treat- ment option is to use a lac- tase replacement product. If your gut isn't making enough natural lactase, you can take lactase drops physician and professor at Harvard Medical School. Go to his website to send questions and get additional information: www.AskDoctorK.com. Woodcutting permits available from Mendocino National Forest Permits are $5 per cord of wood, with a minimum purchase of four cords for $20. The permits are good through December 31, 2012. wood permits are avail- able for purchase from the Mendocino National Forest. Personal use fire- Use of firewood per- mits on the Covelo Ranger District is per- mitted through Nov. 30. The wood does not have to be cut at the same time. removed must be dead and down. It is illegal to remove firewood from the National Forest without a valid permit. Permits must be pur- chased in person from one of the Forest offices. All firewood If a person is unable to cut the wood them- selves, they can obtain a third party authoriza- tion that will allow someone else to cut or gather the wood. However, the permit- tee must still purchase the permit in person. The Mendocino National Forest only accepts cash or check as payment for firewood permits and sales are final, with no refunds. Permittees will receive tags and a map of the Forest. Permit holders should be aware that federal and state quar- antines to prevent the spread of sudden oak death (SOD) are in effect for Lake and Mendocino Counties. Any firewood cut in these counties can only be transported into other SOD quarantine counties, including Alameda, Contra Costa, Humboldt, Marin, San Francisco, Monterey, Napa, San Mateo, Santa Clara, Santa Cruz, Solano and Sonoma. Firewood permits can be purchased from the Mendocino National Forest Supervisor's Office/Grindstone Ranger District Office, 825 N. Humboldt Ave., Willows, CA 95988. Hours are Monday through Friday 8 a.m.- 4:30 p.m. Gathering firewood is important to many individuals and families surrounding the Mendo- cino National Forest. Following are some tips for a safer experience. Plan your trip – check the weather, bring plenty of warm clothes for spring and fall through winter cut- ting, water, emergency food, and the appropri- ate gear for the season when you are gathering firewood. Make sure you have a full tank of gas when you leave and are pre- pared for changing con- ditions in the mountains Also, let someone know where you are going and when you plan to be back. Keep vehicles on designated roads and be aware of changing weather and road condi- tions. Wet dirt roads can quickly turn to mud, making it possible to get stuck and causing damage to road, soil and water resources. If there are puddles in the road, mud flip- ping off the tires or you can see your ruts in the rearview mirror, consid- er pulling over and tak- ing a hike to look for wood, or turning around and finding a different area to cut your fire- wood. As we enter fire sea- son, be aware of fire restrictions or closure order than may be in place restricting where you can go. Make sure you have a spark arrester on chain- saws and any other mechanical equipment being used. Make sure you are cutting firewood on the Mendocino National Forest and not from other federal, state or private lands. For more information call the Mendocino National Forest at 934- 3316.