Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/331331
JUNE 18-24, 2014 UCW 19 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM ADVICE GODDESS Bridle Party I'm going to a friend's bachelor party in Vegas, which includes a strip club visit. My girlfriend said I have to sit that out. She believes going could lead me to cheat on her. I assured her that I have no intention of cheating — ever — and strippers have no interest in me anyway. Well, she's adamant. I caved, agreeing to skip the strip club, but my friends' teasing will be merciless. What if I just go and fib to my girlfriend to keep everyone happy? --Restricted Unless your girlfriend's name is Moses and she's just come back from a mountaintop chat with God, she doesn't get to hand down commandments: "You look at some other woman's woohoobies and I'll ask The Big Guy to smite you." Regarding your caving to her demand, you should un-cave; go to that club with your friends. Not secretly. Openly. In other words, tell her you're doing it. Because an adult shouldn't get to control another adult's behavior, and being in a relationship doesn't change that. Also, allowing her to give you orders sets a really bad precedent. A bachelor party is a male friendship ritual. While women tend to share their feelings Oprah's couch-style, men often bond through drinking, ribbing, and humiliation, like forcing their soon-to-be- married buddy to get onstage on his hands and knees to be spanked by the stripper. Your girlfriend seems to have given no thought to the social repercussions of your telling the guys your governess is making you stay back in your hotel room and watch a movie. And sure, sex for pay is easily findable in Vegas. However, a typical bachelor party visit to a Vegas strip club takes place not at some seedy, out-of-the way joint where anything goes but at a ginormous corporate warehouse of stripping where some 6'8" genetic experiment of a man makes sure no male paws wander anywhere on the dancer they aren't supposed to. The strippers at these places can make 100K a year just dancing, and they aren't looking to the crowd for sex or boyfriends. You could have reassured her about all of this if you each hadn't taken the emotionally easy way out. Instead of talking about her fears, she went all ayatollah on you, and instead of standing up for yourself, you figured you'd just lie to her. Problem-avoiding — rather than laying out your feelings and problem- solving — tends to bode poorly for a relationship's survival. Backtrack and try a little adult conversation. You just might convince her that looking isn't the gateway drug to cheating -- much like ogling a Porsche doesn't lead to grand theft auto. And when you leave for the weekend, she might be more likely to say, "Bye, have a ball" than "Bye, I have your balls." WEEKLY HOROSCOPES ARIES - Mar 21/Apr 20 - People seem to be going out of their way to be nice to you, Aries. While you may suspect they have ulterior motives, their kindness really is nothing more than good will. TAURUS - Apr 21/May 21 - Taurus, approach your workload with an optimistic attitude this week. You can expect your efforts to produce positive results that don't go unnoticed. GEMINI - May 22/Jun 21 - It is an uphill battle to focus on chores this week, Gemini. You would rather be out having fun, but putting off chores now will only lead to more work down the road. CANCER - Jun 22/Jul 22 - Cancer, although you are capable of keeping up appearances this week, you will be lost in your own thoughts. Personal issues prove to be a distraction. LEO - Jul 23/Aug 23 - Leo, serve as a diplomat this week, placing yourself in the middle of conflict because you want to help. Keep a level head and don't get swept into the argument. VIRGO - Aug 24/Sept 22 - Virgo, your ability to focus is very strong, but this week you cannot seem to get your mind to cooperate. You may have a million things to think about. LIBRA - Sept 23/Oct 23 - You are tempted to join the party this week, even though you know it is probably a better idea to decline. But the prospect of socializing and having a good time is too tempting. SCORPIO - Oct 24/Nov 22 - Scorpio, you often feel uncomfortable when you have too many loose ends. It may take quite a while this week to wrap up all of your obligations before you can relax. SAGITTARIUS - Nov 23/Dec 21 - Sagittarius, the more you ponder the decisions you have to make, the more you struggle to determine a positive outcome. Give yourself some breathing room. CAPRICORN - Dec 22/Jan 20 - Career issues must be dealt with, Capricorn. You may have been running through various options, and if you have reached a decision, then go with your gut instincts. AQUARIUS - Jan 21/Feb 18 - Aquarius, although everyone around you seems to be stressing out, for some reason you are able to breeze through your days without a worry in the world. PISCES - Feb 19/Mar 20 - Your intuition is telling you to proceed with caution, Pisces. Watch where you step, but don't let caution take over your life. NEWS OF THE WEIRD by CHUCK SHEPPARD Vanellope, Rydder, Jceion and Burklee head the latest annual list of the most common baby names on the Social Security Administration register of first- time-appearing names. There were 63 Vanellopes (girls), but only 10 each for Rydder and Jceion, the most popular debut names for boys. Other notables were Hatch (eight times) and Psalms (seven). (In other "name" news, among the finalists in April's "Name of the Year" contest sponsored by Deadspin.com were the actual monikers Curvaceous Bass, (Dr.) Eve Gruntfest, Chillie Poon and the winner — Shamus Beaglehole. [Nameberry via MSN.com, 5-15- 2014] Editorial Privilege To celebrate today's 25th anniversary of the weekly distribution of News of the Weird by Universal Uclick, Chuck Shepherd recalls a few of his favorite stories (among the more than 25,000 covered). (1989) In the mid-1980s, convicted South Carolina murderer Michael Godwin won his appeal to avoid the electric chair and serve only life imprisonment. In March, while sitting naked on a metal prison toilet, attempting to fix a TV set, the 28-year-old Godwin bit into a wire and was electrocuted. [Orlando Sentinel, 3-8-89] (1991) Dee Dee Jonrowe, leading the Beargrease Sled Dog Marathon in January in northern Minnesota, took a wrong turn and went 300 yards before recognizing her error. The mistake cost her team only a few minutes, but stopping to calculate her location allowed the dogs an unsupervised rest, and by the time she was ready to go, two of her dogs had begun to copulate. She was forced to wait on them for 25 minutes and lost the lead. [Duluth News Tribune, 1-17-91] (1992) A 38-year-old man, unidentified in news reports, was hospitalized in Princeton, West Virginia, in October with gunshot wounds. He had been drinking beer and cleaning his three guns -- and had accidentally shot himself with each one. He said the first shot didn't hurt, the second "stung a little," and the third "really hurt," prompting him to call for help. [Associated Press via Newsday, 10-11-92] Amy Alkon Chuck Sheppard