Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/317385
DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman GETFUZZY DarbyConley ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARCAROLYN»Myhus- band's parents are in their mid-80s, and they have lived with us for 14 years. They don't pay toward household costs. They moved in with us originally because my mother-in- law took care of my son while I worked. My son is now 15. My father-in-law still works full time at a repair has owns. My husband recently retired due to health issues, cutting our income in half. We are in our mid-50s, facing our son's college costs and our own retirement. I have started to resent having to support my in-laws. I think they should contribute toward household expenses. My husband disagrees. He becomes very angry when- ever I bring this up. Am I in the wrong? I know we all should honor our parents, and they did a lot for us when we were young. What is the right thing to do? —N. DEAR N. » When your spouse not only disagrees with you, but also ignites on contact with the sub- ject, the "right thing to do" becomes moot. Figure out what you can do, and stay on that side of the menu. You can, for example, spend a long day with your finances to track where your money goes. You can then show your husband the numbers — without a peep about his parents. If he accuses you of trying to back into the issue, then explain calmly that he made it clear he wouldn't discuss having his parents contribute so you had to go to Plan B. Talk to him about other income sources, such as disability or other types of work his health issues permit. Most important: You can explain to him that you don't appreciate his shut- ting you down with anger on a topic that profoundly affects not just you two, but also your son, the per- son you were supposedly serving by having your in-laws move in. Explain that you two are in this together emotionally and financially, and as such you expect your concerns to be treated with respect, even if he disagrees. Your husband's refusal to hear dissent promises trouble when your finan- cial and other challenges come due. DEAR CAROLYN » Dating a guy whose first love cheat- ed on him. He forgave her and took her back, till she cut him off for new guy. He says he loves me more than he ever loved her, but if I ever cheat, we are through. I say he loved her more and feel he is settling for me. Please help me under- stand his logic. — M. DEAR M. » Please don't be so literal about people. He might have changed course because he learned something. Typically a good sign. Another suggestion, un- solicited: Trying to parse who loved whom more is rookie stuff. You have what you have, and what matters is whether it fits. Wife wants live-in in-laws to contribute to household budget Carolyn Hax Ask Carolyn Email Carolyn Hax at tellme@washpost.com, follow her on Facebook at www.facebook.com/ carolyn.hax or chat with her online at noon Eastern time each Friday at www.washingtonpost.com. Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Gemini(May21-June20) — Not everyone will share your goals. Avoid a power struggle with someone in a group or organization. Before you act, decide what is acceptable. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — Rein in your tendency to be argumentative today. Don't alienate your friends with aggression and unrealistic de- mands. Keep your distance. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — By traveling outside your usual area, you will meet individuals interested in hearing what you have to offer. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — Now is not a good time to get involved in financial partner- ships. Keep a close watch on your cash and say no to any smooth-talking salesmen. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — Things may be less than harmonious. Don't compound the problem by dredging up past differences. You can rectify the situation if you deal with cur- rent issues first. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — Someone close to you will be resentful of the time you devote to work. Do your best to counter any personal problems with a plan that will reverse the situation. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — A romantic relationship will be triggered by a social event. Participate in as many stimulating activities as you can, so that you can widen your circle of friends. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — You have to think of others in order to avoid criticism. Devote more time to people who count on you and need your attention before you cause a permanent rift. Put family first. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — You could burn out if you don't slow down. Detach your- self from the rat race and relax. Organize and plan your day strategically so that you're not constantly playing catch-up. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — Show your employer how versatile you are. By agree- ing to take on extra tasks, you will boost his or her opinion of you and bring about a financial reward. Aries (March 21-April 19) — Think before you speak. Avoid anyone who is aggressive about his or her beliefs. Tact and diplomacy will be required for group endeavors. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — You need peace and quiet today. Refuse to let friends or relatives meddle in your affairs. You can ease tension by planning some alone time to do something that makes you feel good or more accomplished. Horoscope By Bernice Bede Osol FRIDAY, MAY 23 FRIDAY,MAY23,2014 REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM |YOURDAILYBREAK | 5 B