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2B – Daily News – Wednesday, January 12, 2011 FEATURES Hate hubby’s hostile haranguing Dear Annie: I am disturbed by my husband’s behavior. We were married in June, and I knew that ‘‘Clark’’ had a short temper. But an incident happened last night that fright- ened me. He became upset over a silly mat- ter and screamed profanities, called me a horrible name and threw one of our couch pillows at my face. Clark knows he has anger issues. I usually let these outbursts slide because I understand he doesn’t mean the things he says, but last night changed that. I truly believe that had I been standing next to him, he would have physically harmed me. Clark is a kind and wonderful man, my prince charming, until he gets upset. Then he becomes a completely different person. I know people can lose their tem- per, but this is more than typical anger. If I talk to my family or friends, they would jump to con- clusions about his per- sonality. Do you think he has the potential to hurt me? — Disturbed in W.V. Dear Disturbed: You bet. Someone who cannot control his anger could just as easily throw his fist instead of a pillow. Even if he doesn’t intend to hurt you, it would be too late to stop. We’re glad he realizes he has an anger problem, but that’s only the first step. He needs to get help — for his sake as well as yours. Ask him to talk to his doctor about a referral to Annie’s Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar someone who deals with anger management, and insist that he make an appointment immediately. If he won’t go, or if you see no improve- ment within a specified time, you may need to leave the marriage until he can con- trol himself. Dear Annie: I’m 30 years old, married with two boys. My moth- er-in-law and I don’t get along. Even if I ask her, she does not want to watch our kids. She makes a big fuss about it and acts like it’s a huge burden. However, she will watch her daughter’s child any time, and this upsets me. Her favoritism is bad enough, but in the past month, she seems to think it is my responsi- bility to find a babysitter for her daughter’s child. That’s the last straw. I’ve talked to my husband about it, but he refuses to say anything to his moth- er. Should I stand up to her and tell her how I feel, or keep my mouth shut? I’m afraid if I speak up, it will ruin my hus- band’s relationship with his parents. — Confused in Pennsylvania Dear Confused: Par- ents who treat the grand- children unequally usual- ly reap what they sow. And it is possible that, no matter how delightful your sons are, two of them may be more than Mom can handle. Try approaching her with reconciliation in mind. Explain sweetly that your children would like to spend more time with their grandmother (baby-sitting or not). It could lead to a closer relationship. But either way, you are not obligat- ed to find baby-sitters for your sister-in-law — although you might give her the names of some local teens who would appreciate the extra income and then let her handle her own arrange- ments. Dear Annie: I read with interest the letter from ‘‘Pam,’’ who hasn’t seen her mother since she went into a nursing home. She said she wanted to remember Mom as she used to be. She said Mom would not know who she was. My mother also had Alzheimer’s. She may not have known who I was, but I knew who she was. I also knew how much I meant to her in earlier days, and how much she still meant to me. Both my sister and I visited frequently, even though I lived far away. When Mom died, we had no regrets. To the best of our ability, each of us had done what we could to care, provide and love the mother who loved us through good and bad times in our lives. I echo your advice: ‘‘Go see your mother.’’ — No Regrets Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.n et, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. Medication dosing can be frightening DEAR DR. GOTT: I am a relatively healthy 75-year-old female who leads an active lifestyle. I am concerned that my pulmonary doctor wants to increase my Advair intake from 100/50 to 500/50 because a recent lung infection test revealed a worsening. I am aware that the latest news is that Advair is not recommended for long-term care of asthma. I’ve been on the medication for about 12 years and want to get off it. I’ve not had to take albuterol for sever- al years and do not wheeze unless I have a sinus infection with drainage that gets into my bronchial tubes. This usually happens two to four times a year. The only medications I take are levothyroxine 0.05 and supplemental calcium, omega fish oil and vitamin D. What do you recommend regarding the Advair? Do I follow the pulmonary doctor’s advice to increase it, or what? DEAR READER: The ingredients of Advair are fluticasone and salme- terol. The first is a steroid; the second is a bronchodilator. It is well-known that long-term use of steroids can lead to bone loss and osteoporosis. Those most susceptible are smokers, people who do not get enough exercise and in those with a family history of osteo- porosis. In February 2010, the Los Angeles Times reported the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) wanted to put limits on Serevent, Advair, Symbicort and Foradil. Subsequent to the study, physicians were urged to switch their asthmatic patients from medications that contain such long-acting beta ago- nists (LABAs). Thus, Advair now comes with a black-box warning on the packaging. The largest study was known as the W. SMART trial that revealed a small increase in the risk of death and hospi- talization for asthma and breathing problems in patients taking salmeterol. Keep in mind that the SMART trial did not study or target Advair; however, Dr. Peter Gott because the product contains salmeterol, the black-box warning was mandated. Advair is available in three strengths — 100/50, 250/50 and 500/50. Each contains flu- ticasone in the first strength noted and 50 mcg (micro- grams) of salmeterol PER INHALATION. The maximum recommended dose for asthma is 500/50 twice daily. As with many drugs, a person should take as little as possible while obtain- ing sufficient results. Here’s where things get sticky. Your pulmonologist knows your complete medical history. I do not. I surmise you have a thyroid abnormality, take calci- um and vitamin D to ward off osteo- porosis and omega fish oil for heart health. You are in the hands of a spe- cialist. As much as you might not want to hear it, I must defer to his or her guidelines. I do recommend that you make an appointment so you can have your questions addressed. Do not leave the office without obtaining all the information you feel you require. If questions remain, request a referral to a second pulmonologist and bring your medical records with you. If they both agree on the increased dosing, you will have your answer. To provide related information, I am sending you a copy of my Health Report “Pulmonary Disorders.” Other readers who would like a copy should send a self-addressed stamped No. 10 envelope and a $2 check or money order payable to Newsletter and mailed to Newsletter, P.O. Box 167, Wickliffe, OH 44092-0167. Be sure to mention the title or print an order form off my website at www.AskDrGottMD.com. Dr. Peter H. Gott is a retired physician and the author of several books, including “Live Longer, Live Better,” “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Diet” and “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Cookbook,” which are available at most bookstores or online. His website is www.AskDrGottMD.com