Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
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WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM APRIL 7-13, 2021 UCW 17 DAN DEBRULER, General Manager, WCLN. Comments? Editor@upandcomingweekly. com. 910-484-6200. FAITH In general, parents tend to fear the things they can't control. We tend to be particularly afraid of the sensational hazards, those that draw unwelcome attention and make for movie-of-the-week melodramas. From the gradua- tion from diapers to pants and first loves to getting caught shoplifting candy from a convenience store, there are plenty of opportunities for parents and their children to feel like they've blown it. But the good news is this: you're doing fine. e fact of the matter is that life is a lot shorter than we give it credit for, and for parents, that short span of years is made up of a series of firsts. at's true for you, me, and every parent on the planet. So let's start by giving each other some room to learn, react and grow. If you have more than one child — or any number of siblings — you probably already know how tough life can be on first kids and first time parents. So many experiences in life can be deemed traumatizing in grow- ing up and parenting alike, and while we may flippantly attribute some of the most horrendous sce- narios to bad parenting in some- one else's family, it's not usually how we see it if we're the parent. Somewhere near the middle of my military career my wife and I got a call to meet with the com- mandant of the overseas housing area we lived in. For a military family, that is not a good thing. e commandant is someone whose face is framed in an official hallway somewhere — not sizing you up from across an oversize desk in a quiet office. Whatever our kid had done had put our abil- ity to reside on that installation in jeopardy. In serious cases, families can be ordered to return to the continental U.S. while the military member served out the rest of the tour alone. Not a desirable option. Definitely not the type of thing that gets you promoted. Here's the thing: I don't even remember what happened. I can't recall whatever incident led to the meeting, and I don't remember the meeting itself beyond its im- plications. Gone. Forgotten. Yet at the time, it seemed like the end of the world. Looking past the truly cata- strophic situations that may occur in your life, or the lives of those around you, I want to encourage you with three simple things you need as a parent: License, Love and Forgiveness. Your license to parent is like a two-sided coin. One side affords you the power to exercise the discipline needed to steer your children toward becoming the best person they possibly can be. e other side of that coin is love. Discipline with love will always yield the greatest results, because in that is care and con- cern for the outcome. And finally, forgiveness. Your child will make mistakes, and so will you. Learn early on to own and accept those things that don't go according to plan, because there will be plenty. Perhaps forgiveness will be a little easier when you pause to realize this – not only is it your first time par- enting, but it's your child's first time being your kid. Parents: you're doing fine by DAN DEBRULER VOLUME 14 | ISSUE 10 OCTOBER | 2020 Inspiring, educating, empowering and celebrating women in our community M A G A Z I N E West Fayetteville Farm Girls Fall Flavors for Your Table Help for Women's Health Carve and Craft Pumpkin Art More inside: VOLUME 14 | ISSUE 11 NOVEMBER | 2020 Inspiring, educating, empowering and celebrating women in our community M A G A Z I N E Easy Entertaining with Friends and Family Amplifying Thanks with a Grateful Attitude Destressing the Holidays Soup's On: Simple Suppers More inside: Simple Pleasures Simple Pleasures BY, FOR & ABOUT Inspiring, educating, empowering and celebrating women in our community *PRICING SUBJECT TO CHANGE WITHOUT NOTICE