Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
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THIS WEEK WITH MARGARET Who the Heck Am I? by MARGARET DICKSON Cleaning out some old papers recently, I came across a pile of family to be at any given moment or maybe it is just easier to remember our photographs — some of my parents, my sister and me when we were still earlier selves than to imagine what we might become, but the study clearly that little nuclear family. Warm memories of my childhood growing up in reveals this trait. Jordi Quoidback of Harvard, one of the scientists involved what was then a developing Haymount neighborhood of young families in the study, put it this way. flooded over me. The children and dogs ran around together in packs, a "Believing that we just reached the peak of our personal evolution makes practice parents no longer allow but one which made wonderful memories us feel good. The 'I wish that I knew then what I know now' experience for those of us who grew up that way. might give us a sense of satisfaction and meaning, whereas realizing how Then there were pics of teenaged Margaret, young working Margaret, transient our preferences and values are might lead us to doubt every young wife and mother Margaret. decision and generate anxiety." Some of those made me cringe. It might also lead us to think we have grown to be much more wonderful Why was I wearing such than we really are. a short skirt? What was Believing we have my hair up to that day? reached our apex at How did I ever stand that this moment can also first entry-level radio job cause us some angst in where I was literally at the future. If we do not the bottom of the station understand that change hierarchy? Was I doing is part of life at every a good job raising the stage, we will be surprised Precious Jewels? to find ourselves in a Mostly, though, I tattoo removal parlor to wondered what that get rid of "Mr. Right's" young woman staring name which we — now back at me with the too regretfully — had inked short skirt and the wacky onto our rear end. We hairdo was thinking in are going to be surprised those days? Did she have that the fabulous designer any real sense of what outfit we "invested" in is the future held for her? now embarrassingly out Did she have a plan or of style. We are going to was she just making it be sick that we bought through each day as best Apple stock the day it she could? went public. I could not conjure up At my quite adult exactly what my younger stage of life, with two self was thinking at the challenging and rewarding earlier stages of my life, Middle-aged people … often look back on our teenage selves with some mixture of amusement and chagrin. What we careers behind me and the but I do have the sense never seem to realize is that our future selves will look back and think the very same thing about us. At every age, we're Precious Jewels out in the that I was trying to chart real world, I will have to having the last laugh, and at every age, we're wrong. my course, even though work to remember every not everything has day is new and different played out the way I imagined it would. and that the only certainty in life is change. Intellectually, I know this is It is much trickier to imagine what I will be doing and thinking five years true and I can see how much I have changed in only the last few years. But from now, even two years from now. still, human nature is hard to outwit. Turns out I am not alone. So, I plan to clip the words of Daniel T. Gilbert, another Harvard Writing in The New York Times, John Tierney reports on a recent study psychologist who coauthored the self-perception study, and tape them to of human self-perception published in the Journal of Science. It seems my bathroom mirror. that most of us are pretty good at looking back at our earlier selves, often Says Dr. Gilbert, "Middle-aged people … often look back on our teenage with amusement — even embarrassment, and seeing how much we have selves with some mixture of amusement and chagrin. What we never seem changed. We are not so good, though, at looking forward and seeing how to realize is that our future selves will look back and think the much we will change in the future. Somehow we expect ourselves to stay very same thing about us. At every age, we're having the last just as we are at this moment, a phenomenon the scientists call the "end of laugh, and at every age, we're wrong." MARGARET DICKSON, Conhistory illusion." Amen. Now go do it. tributing Writer, COMMENTS? Maybe it is just human nature to think we are the best we are ever going Editor@upandcomingweekly.com. WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM MARCH 6-12, 2013 UCW 5