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Wednesday, May 12, 2010 – Daily News – 5A FEATURES Criticized for exposing ratfink TV drug commercials are frightening Dear Annie: Some time ago, my boyfriend and I spent the night with his best friend, ‘‘Jimmy,’’ and his girlfriend, ‘‘Eve.’’ During that time, my boyfriend asked me not to bring up the couple’s relationship trou- bles. Jimmy was cheating on Eve, even though they have two children together and planned to get married. After the kids went to bed and the men went outside, Eve confided that she and Jimmy had issues in the bedroom — she thought it was a secret. I told her I already knew and so did every- body else. Eve was shocked and hurt to dis- cover that her sex life was the talk of Jimmy’s friends. She then asked me if I thought Jimmy was cheating on her. She was suspicious and said her relationship counselor suggested she ask every- body she knew. Annie’s Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar Most people told Eve they did- n’t know, or that Jimmy was faithful and a great guy. I happen to know that a lot of his friends cheat on their girlfriends and actually encourage Jimmy to do the same. It disgusted me, and I told her everything. After that, Jimmy and Eve broke up, and Eve got full custody of the children. Now Jimmy hates my boyfriend (not to mention me). But he treated Eve terribly and was abusive physically, as well as emotionally. My boyfriend doesn’t get it. He is angry and says he lost one of his best friends because of me. He makes me feel guilty and brings it up at every opportunity. I am depressed about it and now wish I hadn’t said anything. Every- body I’ve men- tioned it to has said I’m in the wrong. Am I? I thought I was doing the right thing. — Friendless in Michigan Dear Michigan: You did. When asked directly about a partner’s infideli- ty, you should tell the truth. Frankly, Eve even- tually would have discov- ered that Jimmy was cheating anyway, and if he was abusing her, you did her a huge favor. Stop feeling guilty about being the catalyst of their well- deserved breakup, and tell your boyfriend to get over it already. Dear Annie: We find it hard to drop off our kid at a friend’s house for a party or a group school project. We would like to meet either of the parents inside the host’s house. On one occasion, the father talked to me on his doorstep for 10 minutes and never once invited me inside to sit down and be comfortable until my child was ready to leave. Is it normal or appro- priate for parents to drop off their children at a stranger’s place without even getting introduced? We have told our daugh- ter that these people are rude, but she says it is absolutely fine. What is your take on this? — Frustrated With Drop- Offs Dear Frustrated: This is a children’s party, and the parents do not have to entertain each other. You should, of course, meet the other child’s parents, introduce yourself and talk for a few minutes to get some idea of the people who are hosting your child. And although it would be gracious if they invited you inside to wait, they are not obligated to do so. Dear Annie: You are right that ‘‘Almost 21’’ could end up in the emer- gency room or morgue if she drinks 21 shots fol- lowed by 21 beers. But you are wrong that it’s ‘‘double the amount.’’ It’s at least 10 times what anyone should consume. If she hasn’t started drinking by age 21, she has a wonderful opportu- nity to avoid all of the harmful effects of alco- hol. She also can form a life of responsible social drinking if she learns to ‘‘just say no’’ as soon as the buzz begins and then drink water or tea. — Rich in Tallahassee Dear Rich: It has become an unfortunate, but common, rite of pas- sage for many 21-year- olds to binge drink on their ‘‘legal’’ birthday, and we doubt they will stop because someone else says so, no matter how sensible the sugges- tion. Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.n et, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. DEAR DR. GOTT: What is your opinion of TV commercials that spend more time on warn- ings and disclaimers of medica- tions than on what the products will do? And the information is usually at such high speeds that it is hard to understand. For example, one current sleep-aid advertisement warns users of possible aggressive behavior, depression, agitation, allergies, dizziness, swelling of the tongue or throat that could result in death, memory loss and suicidal thoughts. Why would a physician prescribe such a product? Dr. Peter Gott DEAR READER: You have tapped into one of my greatest pet peeves. I lis- ten to TV commercials about drugs that are going to make EVERYTHING all better. There’s nothing that can’t be improved on — from high cholesterol, heart trouble, hypertension, constipa- tion, diarrhea, diabetes, urinary issues, abdominal pain and gastrointestinal discomfort to wrinkle and wart removers. The only thing that must be understood is the never-ending side effects of possible suicidal thoughts, rash, depression, my favorite of oily leakage (yuck!), palpitations and a list that continues. Then there are the people with spe- W. cific diagnoses who are warned not to take these wonder drugs. The com- ments reads something like this: “Don’t take medication X if you suffer from cardiac conditions, diabetes, hyperten- sion, high cholesterol, kidney disor- ders, GI upset, if you are pregnant or plan to become pregnant.” So I often wonder who’s left to take the stuff any- way. If you suffer any ill consequences, you are told to contact your physician. That’s fine if he or she is available. If not and the effects are difficult to man- age, it might likely result in a trip to your local hospital’s emergency room or walk-in clinic. Hopefully, the visit is covered by insurance. If not, guess who got a bad reaction and then bites the bullet by having to pay besides? In all fairness, pharmaceutical com- panies produce medications designed to help people suffering from almost every known condition. For the most part, that is exactly what happens. Peo- ple take medication, and they get better. All is well that ends well. Unfortunate- ly, there’s the oversensitive individual who takes a drug his physician has recommended in good faith, only to find the patient develops hives or worse. What’s a physician to do? As a society, we want and often demand a pill to make us feel better; but that’s easier said than done. It must be understood that side effects are a part of any medication. This includes pre- scription medications, over-the-counter drugs, herbs and homeopathic remedies. We all react in a different manner to what we consume. What works for one person may not work for another. And some side effects can be devastating. Now, on to another of your com- plaints — the speed at which the announcers speak. I know advertising is costly and the message must get out there quickly and concisely but, sadly, many people today speak very quickly, whether on television or not, making it extremely difficult to comprehend what is being said. Words become a blur, and the message is lost. Perhaps younger people can adapt more readily than I, but I have great difficulty listening intently, only to find I lost half the material presented. I’m reminded that aging does hold its disappointments. I recommend that you speak with your physician when any medication is prescribed. Ask why the drug is being prescribed and determine any potential side effects. Together, you can make a decision as to whether it is right for you. To provide related information, I am sending you a copy of my Health Report “Consumer Tips on Medicine.” Other readers who would like a copy should send a self-addressed stamped No. 10 envelope and a $2 check or money order to Newsletter, P.O. Box 167, Wickliffe, OH 44092-0167. Be sure to mention the title or print an order form off my website at www.AskDrGottMD.com. Dr. Peter H. Gott is a retired physician and the author of several books, including “Live Longer, Live Better,” “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Diet” and “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Cookbook,” which are available at most bookstores or online. His website is www.AskDrGottMD.com.