Issue link: http://www.epageflip.net/i/503391
DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman PHOEBEANDHERUNICORN DanaSimpson ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARAMY»I'vestruggled with this issue for nearly a decade. I fell in love with my best friend in high school. It was a lost cause because I'm gay and he's straight. He "experi- mented" with me, but had no interest in a relation- ship; he went on to have a child with a woman. I moved away to college, dated others, even went to counsel- ing, but I've never been able to stop being in love with him. So many things make me think of him, and no feel- ing since has measured up to my first love. I now have a serious boyfriend of three years, whom I do love deeply. I've been upfront with him about my first love, who has been a great point of contention in our relationship. My boyfriend wants me to have no contact with this former love, which I really understand, but it is torturous to me. I feel like I can't talk about it with him, because it's too upsetting. Now we're staying in my hometown for two months, and my obses- sion is in overdrive. I want to see my high school love again; I feel like it could help me move on if I could talk to him, because going cold turkey hasn't worked. I have no reason to believe he could ever love me, and thus I don't see it as a threat to my current boyfriend. What I'd like to know is 1) whether I'm justified in wanting to see him, 2) how I should approach talking about this to my current boyfriend and 3) how I can free myself from this obsession. I feel like I've exhaust- ed all options. What should I do? — O bsess ed DEAR OBSESSED » Your impulse to see the object of your obsession is un- derstandable (you want to feed your obsession), but it isn't necessarily a safe choice. You say you don't have any reason to believe that your first love will ever love you back, and so seeing him is not a threat to your current relation- ship. But your obsession does not require any stimulation at all to thrive — hence the last 10 years of a one-sided fascination. It is definitely a threat to your current relation- ship, whether or not you reconnect. Your obsession is also a threat to the love object's current family. Asking if you are justi- fied in wanting to see the object of your obsession is like asking an addict if he is justified in wanting a fix. The addiction itself provides the "justifica- tion" for feeding the addiction. Given the long-term nature of this and how it has interfered with your life and relationships, you should pursue profession- al counseling again — on your own and also with your current boyfriend. In my opinion, it is not wise for you to see the object of your obsession because of the likelihood it will trigger — not ease — the intensity of your emo- tions. In therapy you may learn that your obsession isn't really about the oth- er guy, but rather about you and your connection to your own sexuality. Man still obsessed over first love more than 10 years later You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribune.com and follow her on Twitter @askingamy. Amy Dickinson Ask Amy Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Taurus(April20-May20) — Turn up the heat. If you have been waiting for someone else to take the lead, you will fall short of your goal. The time is ripe for you to take control and move forward. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — A relationship with a new acquaintance will make a close friend jealous. Don't let anyone bully you into making a donation or commitment that you have doubts about. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — Don't be too timid to ask for help. If you are experiencing a roadblock, make your difficulties known and you will receive the help you need. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — Don't sign on the dotted line before doing the necessary research. Giving in to someone's manipulative tactics will have expensive repercussions. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — Deal with whatever is troubling you. The outcome will not be as negative as you fear. Get in touch with someone from your past who you feel can contrib- ute to your future. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — Get involved in issues that are important to you. Volunteer- ing your time or knowledge to a worthy cause will give you a sense of pride and satisfaction. Valuable connections will result. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — Recent changes at home will come to an amicable conclusion. Your mercurial mood will throw your rivals off-course and help you come out on top. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — You have a lot on your plate, but there's nothing you can't handle if you work hard. Romance is highlighted, making this an ideal time to get to- gether with someone special. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — Make the most of a good thing. An original plan has fabulous fiscal possibilities. This is a good time to close a deal or forge a partnership. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Be open to new possibilities. There is no need to stay stuck in a rut. Broaden your scope to include other areas of interest. Love is on the rise. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — Anxiety will lead to uncer- tainty. Concentrate on your emotional, mental and physical health, and don't allow anyone to make you feel guilty for the choices you make. Aries (March 21-April 19) — Now is the time to take action. Make the best choice for you. Don't let anyone talk you out of doing what makes you feel most comfortable. Looking out for your interests will pay off. Horoscope By Eugenia Last WEDNESDAY, APRIL 29 WEDNESDAY, APRIL 29, 2015 REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM |YOURDAILYBREAK | 3 B