Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
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JULY 2-8, 2014 UCW 23 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM ADVICE GODDESS Destitution Wedding A friend asked me to be a groomsman in his wedding. It's being held hours away, and the only hotel is pricey. With tux rental, attending will cost me over $500. I'll also have to miss work. (I'm a waiter.) Is it okay to decline a wedding invitation because it's too expensive to attend? — Not Richie Rich Instead of just sending regrets, it's tempting to passive-aggressively express your resentment: "Unfortunately, I have a conflict -- in that I have to make my car payment." Some couples may only have friends who are big investment bankers who light their cigars '90s-style, with $20 bills. But in this economy, at least a handful of a couple's pals will probably RSVP with something like, "Dude, I really wanna be there, but I can't find another waiter to cover my shift." Also, people in their 20s and 30s, prime time for marrying, can be invited to several weddings in a single summer. Costs for hotels, flights, clothes, and gifts can add up, and that's really not fair. (Being there on even your most special friend's special day shouldn't mean you have to take the bus for a year.) It's up to the couple getting married to throw the sort of wedding their friends and relatives can afford to attend (or at least not get miffy that some invitees won't be flush enough to come). That said, being fiscally inclusive seems the warm, hospitable thing to do, like making sure your vegetarian friends have something to eat -- instead of just harrumphing, Marie Antoinette-style, "Let them eat steak!" The truth is, it's possible to throw even a fancier wedding without bleeding the invitees. "Black tie optional" allows groomsmen and others to wear a suit instead of renting a tux. And instead of basically telling bridesmaids "Go give Vera Wang $200," you request something like, "Please wear fall colors." Regarding location, a ceremony at a nearby lake pavilion or in Granny's garden will be no less moving than one at the Maui Four Seasons, and people will cry just the same when the couple dance their first dance whether the band is Beyonce or an MP3 mix. Before you decline this invitation, consider your priorities. Even if your friends didn't think to make attending their wedding affordable, they might resent you for not going into debt to come. In my mind, these aren't real friends and they're confusing a wedding with a telethon, but you may have reasons for wanting to keep them in your life. WEEKLY HOROSCOPES ARIES (March 21-April 19). Two great things could happen to you today. The first is that you get what you want. The second is that you don't. Rejection is the universe's protection. Later, you'll look back and say, "Whew! That was close!" TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Small talk? Don't have time. Artistry and style? After the dishes are done! Try not to be militaristic in areas that require a more nuanced approach, like romance, or you could wind up hurting feelings. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Purchases from the Internet, wholesalers, discount stores, etc. are winners. And it's not so much about the actual money you'll save. It's more that you get a sense of pride from realizing how financially capable you are. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Fortuitous meetings are featured in the p.m. Something that starts out all business turns into riotous fun. And when Aquarius or Pisces people are involved, you're even more "on" than you thought. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Your planets bode for an upside-down experience. You may as well dream by day, because your subconscious is busy being logical by night. You have an especially comfortable time relating to a Taurus person. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Friends urge you to disclose the scintillating details of recent goings-on. Some facts about your life are no one's business but your own! The secret you keep inside grows in power, giving you fuel for what you must do next. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Not usually one to have a narrow view of things, you might still get hung up on the details. A few key words from the lips of someone you care about require further investigation. There seem to be many shades of "true." SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Wherever you go, you'll make friends -- especially if you share your inherent kookiness. Being the new person on the scene gives you an advantage. Secret crushes are revealed tonight! SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). The atmosphere hums with surprises and opportunity. Just because something didn't work out in the past doesn't mean it can't in the future. All relationships are picking up momentum, especially love relationships. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). If it's artificial, it won't satisfy you. You're on a mission to find purity -- raw foods, straight truth and paper instead of plastic. Tonight, you demand and get the bottom line. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Your exceptional work makes you the talk around the office. Don't worry. You can live up to your legacy. Time spent alone is personally rewarding tonight -- but the next best thing is time spent with an Aries person. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Someone you've been trying to impress is also trying to impress you. The planetary spotlight is on quality, longevity and durability. See the big picture, and let the details work themselves out for now. NEWS OF THE WEIRD by CHUCK SHEPPARD Marking Japan's latest unfathomable social trend, two paperback photo books -- both consisting only of portraits of the rear ends of hamsters -- have experienced surprising and still-growing printing runs. Japanese society has long seemed easily captured by anything considered "kawaii" (or "cute"), according to a May Wall Street Journal dispatch, and a representative of one book's publisher called his volume "delightfully cute." "I can't stop smiling," he said, "when I see these butts." The two books in print are "Hamuketsu" (hamster buttocks) and "Hamuketsu -- So Cute You Could Faint." A third, "The Original Hamuketsu," was set to debut in June. [Wall Street Journal, 5-21-2014] Recurring Themes Another driver died after being unable to dodge his own vehicle. A 58-year-old man was hit by his SUV in New York City in June after he double-parked and was opening the door on the passenger side and realized that the vehicle was still in reverse gear. He tried to jam one foot onto the brake but hit the gas instead, causing the car to jump backward, ejecting him, and pinning him between the SUV and a van parked alongside. The man suffered a heart attack and died as his vehicle broke free and drifted across the busy Manhattan intersection of Madison Avenue and East 49th Street. [DNAinfo New York, 6-5-2014] Dead or just in "deep meditation"? A renowned Hindu guru, Shri Ashutosh Maharaj, in his 70s, passed away in January (so concluded police in Jalandhar, India), but His Holiness' disciples have refused to release the body, keeping it in a commercial freezer, contending that he has merely drifted into the deeper form of the meditation for which he is well-known -- and will return to life when he is ready. (The guru's religious order, not coincidentally, is a real estate powerhouse in the Punjab region and on nearly every continent, and the guru's family is certain the "meditation" is a ruse to allow the Ashram's continued control of the financial empire.) [Daily Telegraph (London), 5-28-2014] After the U.S. Postal Service finalizes its purchase of "small-arms ammunition," it will become only the most recent federal agency to make a large purchase of bullets for its armed agents (who are perhaps more numerous than the public realizes). In the last year or so, reports have surfaced that the Social Security Administration ordered 174,000 hollow-point bullets, the Department of Agriculture 320,000 rounds, Homeland Security 450 million rounds (for its 135,000 armed agents), the FBI 100 million hollow- points, and even the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration 46,000 rounds. (In May, the Department of Agriculture added an order of submachine guns and body armor.) [Newsmax, 4-14-2014] [Washington Times, 5-16-2014] Amy Alkon Chuck Sheppard IN THE MORNING Weekdays 5:30AM to 10:00AM