Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/793182
ChipThompson, Editor How to have your say: Letters must be signed and provide the writer's home street address and home phone number. Anonymous letters, open letters to others, pen names and petition-style letters will not be allowed. Letters should be typed and no more than two double-spaced pages or 500words. When several letters address the same issue, a cross section will be published. Email: editor@ redbluffdailynews.com Fax: 530-527-9251 Mail to: Daily News 728Main St., Red Bluff, CA 96080 Facebook: Leave comments at FACEBOOK.COM/ RBDAILYNEWS Twitter: Follow and send tweets to @REDBLUFFNEWS Hardtobelieve,butIjust finished my second full year writing this absolutely scintil- lating column. Over the past two years, I have written over 100,000 words; and a foolish few of you occasion- ally read at least some of those words. My original purpose for writing a column was to side- step expensive costs associ- ated with advertising con- certs, events and the goings on at the historic State Theatre. Even though Linda Bullock, our Front of House Manager, often tells me that because of my pitifully small follow- ing we still need to advertise, I have attempted to promote the State Theatre on a weekly ba- sis. That said, I have had more fun writing about other stuff of my choosing. When I started writing Wil- liam Tells, I wrote that there would be at least a bit of truth in everything I write. I also forewarned readers to read my column with a grain of salt; as on occasion I might stretch the truth a bit, or enhance a story for the purpose of making my- self look better than I really am. Stretching the truth to make myself look superior to others is, frankly, something I do very well. Unfortunately, sometimes readers take me a bit too seri- ously or literally, resulting in a misguided impression that I am some sort of egotistical jerk who is far too full of myself. One would think after being married to me for 49 years my wife would stop thinking that. A prime example of how readers sometimes sadly mis- interpret the meaning of my words is the tag line that ap- pears at the bottom of this col- umn. When the big-deal edi- tor of this paper suggested that I write my own tag line, he did not stipulate that said tag line be based on the truth. Inasmuch as I am very much a sports nut and have partici- pated in sports my entire life, I chose to include in my tag line that I am an exceptional ath- lete. Many of you seem to think I am saying that I am a supe- rior athlete; and you would be correct. It seems to me that I would be foolish to admit that although I love sports, I am re- ally a mediocre athlete who has never really excelled at any- thing. It is my column, and as long as I am allowed to write my own stuff, I shall remain an exceptional athlete. You may have noticed that I avoid writing about politics and politicians, as I feel it is a total waste of time. Each of us believes what we believe, pure and simple. That said, I am proud to admit that it was likely me who gave rise to such current political terms as alter- native facts and fake news. Several months back I sug- gested that my really good friend Tom Amundson was dumb as a post, when noth- ing could be further than the truth. A college-educated, highly respected physical ther- apist, Tom is definitely smarter than at least a few folks within the community. Fake news it was. A few weeks back I wrote that three or four decades back during a scuffle with a local bad guy, I grabbed the leg of former Red Bluff Police Chief Al Shamblin, thus doing more harm than good. Fake news again. Pure hyperbole, with al- ternative facts galore. Just last week I boasted that among my friends I am, with- out question, the very best duck hunter of the entire group. Not only is that an example of al- ternative facts and fake news, it is a bold-faced lie. But what would you have me do? Should I have admitted that I can't hit crap, and am so inept that I once stuck the barrel of my shotgun in the mud — only to blow out the end of the barrel with my very next pull of the trigger? Should I have admit- ted that with that little stunt, I picked up the nickname Elmer Fudd? It's my column, and it ain't gonna happen. The most difficult thing about writing a weekly column is that it comes around every seven days. Coming up with fascinating things to write about is nearly impossible, something I prove each and ev- ery week. Some of you may recall the week when I removed my wife's daily calendar from the wall and used my 1,000-word allocation to list our daily plans and activities for the en- tire summer of 2016. I remem- ber nodding off several times while typing that column. I can only imagine how tough it was for those who actually took the time to read it. The single most popular col- umn I have written is, with- out question, the Bunco col- umn. Apparently, every Bunco group and every member of a Bunco group in America oper- ates with the very same under- standing: it is both appropriate and necessary that extravagant and unreasonable steps be taken to ensure that a 90-min- ute event held one time each year appears to represent said Bunco member's pathetically boring daily existence. It is also apparent that every husband who wishes to remain married to a Bunco mem- ber, when requested to com- plete a Bunco-related remodel- ing project, the only acceptable response is "yes, dear," after which said husband should im- mediately set about completing said remodeling project while attempting to stay the hell out of her way. In any event, writing a col- umn has for the most part been a rewarding experience. While the pay sucks and I ad- mittedly follow very few rules regarding the dos and don'ts of writing, I do enjoy sharing my thoughts about this com- munity, as well as the folks who have been so important in making it what it is today. I hope y'all enjoy reading them as well. •••• The State Theatre seat re- placement sponsorship pro- gram is progressing very well. On behalf of STFTA, I would like to thank all of you who have participated in this unique opportunity. For more information on the program call 529-2787, or check it out at www.statetheatreredbluff.com. •••• Coming State Theatre At- tractions: March 13, The Four Freshmen. BillCorneliusisalifelong resident of Red Bluff, a retired Chief Probation Officer, a champion of the State Theatre and an exceptional athlete. He can be reached at bill. cornelius@sbcglobal.net. WilliamTells Awordabout more than 100,000 words Cartoonist's take Americans have way too much stuff. According to the American Psychological As- sociation, Amer- icans "own twice as many cars per person, eat out twice as often and enjoy endless other commodi- ties that weren't around" in 1957 — "big-screen TVs, microwave ov- ens, SUVs and handheld wireless devices, to name a few." Yet we are LESS happy, ac- cording to a variety of studies, than we were six decades ago. Frank Capra explored materi- alism in his classic 1938 movie, "You Can't Take It With You." The main character is an old fel- low played by Lionel Barrymore. Friends and neighbors refer to him as "Grandpa." It took him a lifetime, but in his early '70s, he knows what is really important in life. Thirty years earlier, Grandpa had been an up-and-coming businessman. He was on his way to acquiring great wealth. One day, after riding an elevator to his top-floor office, he didn't get out when the doors opened. Something snapped in him. He took the elevator back to the lobby, left the building and never returned. Instead, he used the money he had saved, a mod- est amount, to fund a world of beauty and creativity within the colorful home where he and sev- eral others lived. His daughter is a mystery writer who taps continuously on her typewriter in the living room. His son-in-law invents rockets and fireworks in the basement. Another inventor living in the house had come to deliver ice 15 years earlier and never left. Grandpa's grandson-in-law is a musician and also an inventor. His granddaughter is a dancer whose Russian teacher never misses a free dinner at the home. Another fellow had been a frus- trated bookkeeper, but Grandpa talks him into quitting his job so he can work full-time making scary rubber masks. The plot thickens when a rich businessman tries buying Grand- pa's house. The businessman has plans to tear down the neighbor- hood to build a factory and get richer, but Grandpa refuses to sell — even though he is offered four times the value of the house. All sorts of amusement and chaos take place, but toward the movie's end, Grandpa finds him- self in trouble with the law — for making unlicensed fireworks and disturbing the peace when the fireworks go haywire. Dozens of neighbors and friends, whom Grandpa has helped over the years, arrive and collect all the money they have to bail Grandpa out of jail. The rich businessman comes around in the end and re- alizes that "you really can't take material possessions with you." But don't we all know this — and keep forgetting it? We keep building massive houses, buying cars we don't need and can't af- ford, and racking up credit-card debt to buy more stuff. Like Grandpa, we know that the happiest moments in our own lives involve friends and fam- ily — people we love. These are the people who affect the deeper parts of our nature — our spir- its and souls — where true happi- ness resides. These are the people who can make us laugh so hard our guts hurt, help us when we're down and engage us in deeply satisfying conversations. The Mayo Clinic confirms this obvious truth. Its research finds that "people who are happy seem to intuitively know that their happiness is the sum of their life choices." People who are happy do five things that Grandpa did: They devote time to family and friends, appreciate what they have, maintain an optimistic outlook, feel a sense of purpose and live in the moment. Grandpa was right. Peo- ple and creativity and laughter make us happy — not the mate- rial junk that we can't take with us. Tom Purcell, author of "Misadventures of a 1970s Childhood" and "Wicked Is the Whiskey," a Sean McClanahan mystery novel, both available at Amazon.com, is a Pittsburgh Tribune-Review humor columnist. Send comments to Tom@TomPurcell.com. Tom Purcell All our stuff's no key to happiness The most difficult thing about writing a weekly column is that it comes around every seven days. Coming up with fascinating things to write about is nearly impossible, something I prove each and every week. Chip Thompson, Editor How to have your say: Letters must be signed and provide the writer's home street address and home phone number. Anonymous letters, open letters to others, pen names and petition-style letters will not be allowed. Letters should be typed and no more than two double-spaced pages or 500words. When several letters address the same issue, a cross section will be published. Email: editor@ redbluffdailynews.com Fax: 530-527-9251 Mail to: Daily News 728Main St., Red Bluff, CA 96080 Facebook: Leave comments at FACEBOOK.COM/ RBDAILYNEWS Twitter: Follow and send tweets to @REDBLUFFNEWS Bill Cornelius Tom Purcell It can be a challenge to fol- low the pronouncements of Pres- ident Trump, as he often seems to change his position on any number of items from week to week, or from day to day, or even from minute to minute. Consider his speech last week at the Con- servative Political Action Con- ference (CPAC). It was reported as "fiery" and "blistering," but it was also full of contradictions. In the speech, President Trump correctly pointed out that the last 15 years of US military action in the Middle East has been an almost incomprehensi- ble waste of money — six trillion dollars, he said — and that af- ter all that US war and meddling the region was actually in worse shape than before we started. It would have been better for US Presidents to have spent the last 15 years at the beach than to have pursued its Middle East war policy, he added, stating that the US infrastructure could have been rebuilt several times over with the money wasted on such militarism. All good points from the Pres- ident. But then minutes later in the same speech he seemed to forget what he just said about wasting money on militarism. He prom- ised he would be "upgrading all of our military, all of our mili- tary, offensive, defensive, every- thing," in what would be "one of the greatest military buildups in American history." This "greatest" military buildup is in addition to the tril- lions he plans on spending to make sure the US nuclear arse- nal is at the "top of the pack" in the world, as he told the press last Thursday. And that is in ad- dition to the trillion dollar nu- clear "modernization" program that is carrying over from the Obama Administration. Of course when it comes to nuclear weapons, the United States already is at the "top of the pack," having nearly 7,000 nuclear warheads. How many times do we need to be able to blow up the world? At CPAC, President Trump is worried about needlessly spend- ing money on military misad- ventures, but then in the same speech he promised even more military misadventures in the Middle East. Where is the money going to come from for all this? Is the President going to raise taxes to pay for it? Is he going to make massive cuts in domestic spend- ing? In the same CPAC speech, President Trump reiterated his vow to "massively lower taxes on the middle class, reduce taxes on American business, and make our tax code more simple and much more fair for everyone." And that's all good. So it's not coming from there. Will he cut domestic spend- ing? The President has indicated that he also wants a massive in- frastructure modernization pro- gram launched in the near fu- ture. The plan will likely cost far in excess of the trillion dollars the President has suggested. That leaves only one solution: printing money out of thin air. It has been the favorite trick of his predecessors. While he cor- rectly condemns the $20 trillion national debt passed down from previous Administrations, his policies promise to add to that number in a massive way. Print- ing money out of thin air de- stroys the currency, hastening a US economic collapse and plac- ing a very cruel tax on the work- ing and middle classes as well. Following the President's con- stantly changing policies can make you dizzy. That's a shame because the solution is very sim- ple: end the US military empire overseas, cut taxes and regula- tions at home, end the welfare magnet for illegal immigration, and end the drug war. And then get out of the way. Ron Paul is a former Congressman and Presidential candidate. He can be reached at the RonPaulInstitute.org. Ron Paul On military spending, it's Trump vs. Trump OPINION » redbluffdailynews.com Wednesday, March 1, 2017 » MORE AT FACEBOOK.COM/RBDAILYNEWS AND TWITTER.COM/REDBLUFFNEWS A4