Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/77640
4B Daily News – Tuesday, August 7, 2012 FEATURES Boss' attention divides co-workers past seven years, I've worked for ''Joe'' and his assistant, ''Nancy.'' Nancy recently took a four-month leave due to stress and anx- iety. During her absence, Joe and I went to lunch a few times and dinner on one occasion. Nothing romantic happened. I planned to let Nancy know at the time, but didn't think it was impor- tant enough to send an email. I left her a voicemail to call me and hoped we'd get together during her leave. Unfortu- nately, I didn't get the chance. When she came back, Nancy accused me of ''swooping in'' and taking over Joe. I have tried talking to her, but she's angry that I didn't tell her during her leave. I explained that I tried, but she never called me back. She claims I crossed her terri- tory and now can't be trusted. She believes I was plotting all along. I also suspect that she is spreading rumors about me, saying I want to sleep with Joe. That's not true. I am trying my best not to let this bother me. Joe has spoken to her, but I don't have any idea what he said. The problem is, it is extremely uncomfortable in the office now. Although I love my work, I may need to look for a new job. It upsets me that someone could be so cruel, even though I tried my best to be supportive during her leave. Any suggestions for coping Dear Annie: For the Annie's Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar with Nancy? - Co-worker Dear Co-worker: Nancy seems very proprietary toward Joe, and unless they are a romantic couple, he should set her straight. Her behavior is unprofessional and disruptive. But you are not entirely blameless. Hav- ing lunch and dinner with your boss could be miscon- strued, and you were well aware that this would bother Nancy. You should have made a greater effort to speak to her during her absence. Apologize sincerely for uninten- tionally stepping on her toes, reas- sure her that you have no interest in Joe, and then let her make the next move. If time does not alleviate the situation, you may opt to take it up with human resources. Dear Annie: My husband is retired, while I still work four days a week. He hires someone to cut the grass, but I trim the bushes, pull the weeds, wash the windows and do all the housecleaning and laundry. He will help cook because I don't have time and he likes to eat. So what does he do all day? He hangs out with his friends, goes for a walk or to the gym, attends Bible study classes and visits the sick. I think maybe I should get sick and see if he will visit me. — Over- worked in Ohio Dear Ohio: While it's admirable that your husband visits the sick, he apparently believes that retirement means he is free from all obliga- tions except those he willingly chooses. This is unfair to you. First try talking to him about it, explain- ing that you see no reason to have two jobs while he has none. Tell him that pitching in and doing his share will help your marriage. But you also are taking on more than you need to. If you can afford it, hire someone to do the more diffi- cult, time-consuming chores. Leave his laundry where it falls, and let him handle it. You can make choic- es, too. Sleep deprivation can have consequences TOR K: Between work and caring for my kids, I barely get four hours of sleep a night. Are there long-term consequences of this kind of sleep deprivation? DEAR DOC- Dear Annie: ''Disgusted in Louisiana'' took issue with your response to ''Desperate House- wife'' that all couples need to tend to their marriages and flirt with their spouses. I am sorry to hear how unhappy she is. I have been married to the love of my life for 50 years. Yes, perhaps the passion from long ago is gone, but we flirt, snuggle and have ''date night,'' and my heart still flutters when he enters the room. I cannot imagine my life without him. Grow- ing old together is exactly what we treasure. — Happy in El Paso Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. Children's medical grants available The UnitedHealthcare Children's Foundation (UHCCF) is seeking grant applications from families in Tehama County in need of finan- cial assistance to help pay for their child's health care treatments, services or equipment not covered, or not fully covered, by their com- mercial health insurance plan. More than 3,500 medical grants have been awarded since 2007. vices, surgeries, pre- scriptions, wheelchairs, orthotics, eyeglasses and hearing aids. To be eligible for a grant, children must be 16 years of age or younger. Families must meet economic guide- lines, reside in the Unit- ed States and have Qualifying families can receive up to $5,000 to help pay for medical services and equipment such as physical, occu- pational and speech therapy, counseling ser- commercial health insurance plan. Grants are available for medical expenses families have incurred 60 days prior to the date of application as well as for ongoing and future medical needs. Parents or legal guardians may apply for grants at www.uhccf.org and there is no application a deadline. Organizations or private donors can make tax-deductible donations to the founda- tion at this website. "The UnitedHealth- care Children's Founda- tion is dedicated to improving a child's health and quality of life by making it easier to access needed medical- related services. The grants enable families to focus on their children's care instead of worrying about how they'll pay their medical bills," said Dan Rosenthal, CEO, UnitedHealthcare of Northern California. "Eligible families in need are encouraged to apply online for a med- ical grant today and take advantage of this valu- able resource." awarded more than 1,200 grants to families across the United States for treatments associat- ed with medical condi- tions such as cancer, spina bifida, muscular dystrophy, diabetes, hearing loss, autism, cystic fibrosis, Down syndrome, ADHD and cerebral palsy. As suc- cessful fund-raising efforts continue to grow, UHCCF is hoping to help more children and families in 2012. To apply or learn more visit www.uhccf.org. In 2011, UHCCF DEAR READ- ER: If you are like most people, you're not getting enough sleep, and there could be consequences. There are some people who appear to need less sleep than the average person and who don't pay a price for getting less of it. But we're not sure of that, and we don't know how to identify such people. Dr. K by Anthony L. Komaroff, M.D. you're like the average per- son, who needs seven and a half to eight hours per night. If so, then sleeping only four hours a night means you are suffering from partial sleep depriva- tion. You are getting some sleep, but not the amount that most people need. After only two or more nights of short sleep, most people usually show signs of irritability and sleepi- ness. Work performance begins to suffer, and you're more likely to experience headaches, stomach prob- lems and sore joints. You're also at far higher risk of falling asleep while driving. So I have to assume over months or years can have more serious, poten- tially life-threatening con- sequences: Viral infections. There's But inadequate sleep some evidence that when you're tired, you're more likely to get sick. Weight gain. Sleep deprivation can make you feel hungrier and slow your body's metabolism. And when you're tired, you're less likely to exercise. Taken together, this combi- nation can lead to unhealthy weight gain. Diabetes. Insufficient Heart disease. One large study found that compared with women who slept for seven hours, women who got no more than four hours of shut-eye were twice as likely to die from heart disease. That's not surprising, given the effects of short sleep on heart dis- ease risk factors. Still, it was a wake-up call for the women who were the focus of the study — women who have too much to do and too little time to do it. Mental illness. Sleep problems often precede a diagnosis of major depres- sion and anxiety. Clearly, sleep is not a High blood pressure. Sleeping fewer than six hours per night appears to increase your risk of high blood pressure. sleep can disrupt your body's hor- mone regulation, increasing your risk for Type 2 dia- betes. luxury, but a basic compo- nent of a healthy lifestyle. Getting enough sleep requires discipline. Block off certain hours for sleep and then follow through. And it's not just the number of hours between when you lie down and when you wake up that matters. It's also the quality of sleep during those hours. I have a list of tips for get- ting a sound sleep on my website. We also have more information on sleep depri- vation in our Special Health Report, "Improving Sleep." (Learn more about this report at AskDoc- torK.com, or call 877-649- 9457 toll-free to order it.) Dr. Komaroff is a physician and professor at Harvard Medical School. To send questions, go to AskDoctorK.com, or write: Ask Doctor K, 10 Shattuck St., Second Floor, Boston, MA 02115. 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