4B Daily News – Monday, October 31, 2011 Finding the words:
What do you say to a friend who has been diagnosed with breast cancer?
By Alexia Elejalde-Ruiz Chicago Tribune (MCT)
Even the best-intentioned person can become speechless or tongue-tied when reacting to a loved one's breast cancer diagnosis. What should you say? And what should you not say? Several peer counselors at Y-Me National Breast Cancer Organization offered the statements they found most and least helpful to hear during their own breast cancer battles.
HELPFUL "I'm here for you, and we'll see this through together." "I'll organize your friends to make dinners, drive car pools,
shop, etc. — whatever would be helpful." "I know this is difficult for you, but please know I will do all I can to support you." "I'm so sorry you have to go through this, but I'm here to help in any way." "Would you like to tell me more about it?"
NOT HELPFUL "You'll be fine." "You poor thing." "I know how you feel." "I know someone who died from that." "Call me if you need anything." "Will you be OK financially since you won't be able to
work?" "I think you should …"
AS FOR TIMING … Many friends and family members rush to offer support upon hearing news of a cancer diagnosis — but then the calls subside, even as the cancer treatment stretches on. Stay connected for the long haul, checking in with periodic phone calls or emails to see how she's doing or just to talk about something normal.
©2011 the Chicago Tribune Visit the Chicago Tribune at www.chicagotribune.com Distributed by MCT Information Services
Learn more about navigating breast cancer
Chicago Tribune (MCT)
American Cancer Society: cancer.org/cancer/breastcancer Breast cancer overview, detailed guide, treatment decision tool, news, research and prevention. Includes local office locator.
Breastcancer.org: breastcancer.org/community Discussion boards, blog, chat rooms, ask-the-expert online conferences, email updates, booklets, recommended reading and links, medical expense tax deduction information.
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) Breast Cancer and Mammography Information: apps.nccd.cdc.gov/cancercontacts/nbccedp/contacts.asp Includes locator link to places where you can get free or
low-cost mammograms or Pap smears. 888-842-6355. Email cdcinfo@cdc.gov.
FORCE (Facing Our Risk of Cancer Empowered): facingourrisk.org For women at risk of developing hereditary breast and/or
ovarian cancer, information about finding medical and finan- cial assistance and how to manage and live with hereditary risk factors. 866-824-RISK. Email info@facingourrisk.org.
HealingWell.com: healingwell.com/breastcancer Breast cancer resource center includes message forums, chat rooms, e-mail, books, videos, newsletters, news, infor- mation and a resource directory.
KidsHealth for Kids Breast Cancer Information: kidshealth.org/kid/grownup/conditions/breast — cancer.html
Breast cancer information described in language that kids can comprehend.
National Cancer Institute: cancer.gov/cancertopics/types/breast Treatment, prevention, causes, clinical trials, cancer litera-
ture, research, screening and testing. 800-4-CANCER. LiveHelp online chat available.
Susan G. Komen for the Cure: komen.org Comprehensive information and links to your local affiliate office, including community-based education and screening and treatment programs.
Free housecleaning for those with breast cancer: cleaningforareason.org
This nationwide nonprofit coordinates free maid service for
women who are undergoing treatment. Call 877-337-3348.
©2011 the Chicago Tribune Visit the Chicago Tribune at www.chicagotribune.com Distributed by MCT Information Services
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