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Saturday, July 23, 2011 – Daily News 3B FEATURES Forget freeloader Dear Annie: I am 30 years old and divorced with two young sons. Two years ago, I began dating ‘‘Brad,’’ who is six years younger. He doesn’t work or go to school and now lives with me and my kids. I work full time and pay someone to clean and watch my kids until I get home. Recently, I’ve been getting annoyed. Annie’s Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar I love to eat out and go out for a Satur- day or Sunday so my kids and I don’t get bored, but I’m tired of paying his way for everything we want to do. I do care about Brad, and he’s been employed here and there, but those jobs last about two weeks, and then they fire him or he simply doesn’t return. I have tried to talk to him about it, but he ends up getting mad and yelling or walking away. What do you think I should do? — Minnie in Texas Dear Minnie:Please throw this guy out and get your life back. As long as you allow Brad to be a freeloader and treat you like his mother, he will con- tinue to do so. He is 24 and needs to grow up. You have young children, and you are modeling behavior they will absorb and apply to their own lives in SAN DIEGO (AP) — One person who’s not sweating over the poor reviews of the first three ‘‘Twilight’’ movies is the guy directing the final two. Bill Condon has gotten used to critical acclaim with his own last three films, ‘‘Dreamgirls,’’ ‘‘Kinsey’’ and ‘‘Gods and Monsters.’’ He’s virtually guaranteed a colossal commercial success with parts one and two of ‘‘The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn,’’ the final install- ments of the supernatural saga due out this Novem- ber and next year. But if ‘‘Breaking Dawn’’ follows the pat- tern of the previous ‘‘Twi- light’’ tales, he may find critics a tough crowd to please. ‘‘I don’t think you can ever anticipate that,’’ Condon said in an inter- view at the Comic-Con fan convention in San Diego, where he and stars Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson and Taylor Lautner previewed two the future. Irresponsible boy-men should not be moving in. Tell Brad it’s time for him to find his own place, and if he’s smart, he’ll also find a job. If you want to date him, fine, but don’t sup- port him. Dear Annie: I’ve noticed many let- ters in your column dealing with the death of a spouse. Most are from wid- ows, but I am a husband who unex- pectedly lost his wife. While the whole ordeal defies description, I must say that my children and friends have really stepped up to the plate. I rarely eat alone, as my kids usually insist that I join them, and I try to cook for them once a week. Eating alone, for me, is deadly. My friends, most of whom were much closer to my wife, continue to include me in their activities. At times, I find myself going to events that I’m not all that interested in, but I want to be asked the next time, so I make the effort. I’ve also continued to work into my late 60s because I enjoy the com- pany of my co-workers. While I believe women cope better with the death of a spouse than do men, the role of family and friends is critical in both cases. It is family and friends and lots of activities that help us get through the trying times. — Doing OK Dear Doing: For whatever reason, people are more apt to feel it necessary to ‘‘take care’’ of widowers, while wid- scenes of ‘‘Breaking Dawn — Part 1’’ for eager viewers. ‘‘I was turned on by the story and then by the script, and I have to say for me, I started out in horror movies, and I’ve been looking for a way to make another horror movie. And horror movies don’t tend to get the great- est reviews. Some of them do, classics, but a lot of them don’t. So I think that comes with the territory.’’ Condon, 55, began his directing career with 1995’s fright flick ‘‘Can- dyman: Farewell to the Flesh,’’ a critical and commercial dud. Three years later, he was an Academy Award winner for his screenplay for ‘‘Gods and Monsters,’’ the director’s portrait of ‘‘Frankenstein’’ filmmak- er James Whale. Condon scored again with his Oscar-nominated screen- play for the musical smash ‘‘Chicago,’’ and after making the film biography ‘‘Kinsey,’’ he delivered his own song- ows often are left to fend for them- selves. It could be the perception that men need more assistance with meals and housekeeping, or that there is a greater tolerance for the ‘‘extra man’’ at a social event. We are glad that you are making every effort to remain active and social, and it’s wonderful that your children and friends have stepped up to the plate. We wish it were so for all those in your position. Dear Annie: I wanted to thank you for printing ‘‘Dead at 17’’ again. That story really touched me. I am 16 years old and just got my driver’s permit a month ago. It’s a very scary experience. I am a careful driver, but that essay made me open my eyes about what goes through a kid’s head and what we might do when there isn’t a parent in the passenger seat. I showed that essay to my drivers’ ed teacher, and she is going to use it next year to teach the kids about what can happen. Thanks again, Annie. — Biglerville Student Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W.Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. ’Twilight’ closer Condon doesn’t fear critics and-dance hit with ‘‘Dreamgirls.’’ Now he’s the final cus- todian of an enormously popular fantasy series, following ‘‘Twilight’’ director Catherine Hard- wicke and her successors, Chris Weitz and David Slade, to conclude the story of teenager Bella Swan’s bizarre love trian- gle with vampire Edward Cullen and werewolf Jacob Black. Adapted from Stephe- nie Meyer’s books, ‘‘Twi- light’’ is a rarity in Holly- wood for building block- buster success from a mainly female audience, rather than the young males normally targeted by studios. That idea thrills Condon. The final films touch on loss of virginity, mar- riage, pregnancy and death, ‘‘all touchstones in a woman’s life that are played out against this genre story,’’ Condon said. ‘‘That is so rare in the way that we tell movies. All the parts of a boy’s adolescence are endlessly covered and examined in our main- stream movies, but women don’t get that.’’ At Comic-Con, Con- don got a taste of the adu- lation to come from audi- ences. Fans cheered and called out praise to him and the cast during the preview presentation, whose footage included a honeymoon scene between Stewart’s Bella and Pattinson’s Edward and an ominous sequence in which Lautner’s Jacob sides with rival vampires to protect Bella from his werewolf kin. Fans cannot get enough of ‘‘Twilight,’’ but Condon does not blame critics for being out of step with popular taste by trashing the movies. ‘‘I would say absolute- ly not,’’ Condon said. ‘‘That’s their job, to hold to their standards and their sense of movie histo- ry, and no, I have never thought there should be a correlation between suc- cess and how it does criti- cally.’’ Rodriguez announces ‘Sin City,’ ‘Machete’ sequels SAN DIEGO (AP) — Robert Rodriguez wait- ed until Comic-Con to announce that he’s plan- ning sequels to ‘‘Sin City’’ and ‘‘Machete.’’ He says a script for ‘‘Sin City 2’’ is being refined, and he hopes for two sequels to last year’s ‘‘Machete’’ — at least one of which will bring the blade-slinging star into space. ‘‘Even if we don’t get to three, I’m at least making the trailer for three because it’s so good. I would put it even before part two,’’ Rodriguez said. ‘‘Machete goes into space! It’s like ‘Moon- raker.’’’ The 43-year-old film- maker made the announcements Thurs- day in front of 6,500 fans at the San Diego Convention Center, then celebrated the news at an intimate party at the Hard Rock Hotel across the street. He also discussed his latest film, ‘‘Spy Kids 4,’’ which is set to release in ‘‘4-D’’ next month. Playing in both 2-D and 3-D, the fourth dimension is ‘‘smell-o- vision.’’ Rodriguez explained that moviego- ers will receive a card when they come into the theater that has eight numbers on it that hold scents that correspond with the film. ‘‘When a number flashes on screen, you scratch that number and you smell it, and what- ever they’re smelling on screen, you smell in the audience,’’ he said. ‘‘There’s sweet smells and bad smells — because we have a baby and we have a dog — and it’s really fun.’’ Rodriguez also announced three new partnerships: He plans to develop games and movies with the ‘‘Heavy Metal’’ franchise, create a museum and other media around the fanta- sy artwork of Frank Frazetta and inspire computer hardware for filmmaking with the tech company AMD. He says a full plate makes him more pro- ductive: ‘‘You get more ‘Yard Sale Map’ Updated Thursday afternoon – for weekend Yard Sales! Click on locations for exact addresses and driving directions! ‘ at www.redbluffdailynews.com . Mouse over the red ‘ ’ tab and scroll down to ‘ ’ can be easily accessed from our top menu ’ and click. done when you’re busy. It almost helps you focus on something more when you don’t have too much time to overthink it.’’ Rodriguez said he kept these announce- ments quiet until Comic-Con out of his natural identification with pop-culture fans. Said the Comic-Con veteran: ‘‘If I’m stand- ing in line all that time, I want to hear some- thing good.’’ Understanding cholesterol DEAR DR. GOTT: I am a 59-year-old female, about 145 pounds (I should be 135). For about 10 years, I have eaten no mammal meat, have excluded milk and dairy from my diet, and have avoided shellfish. I start each day with a bowl of cooked oat bran with soy milk. I average more than 30 grams of soluble and insoluble fiber per day. I eat salmon, tuna and a little poultry. I exercise vigorously at least three times a week and wear a heart monitor so I get at least 25 minutes in the 75- to 90-percent maxi- mum zone. My blood pres- sure averages 102/58. My first cholesterol test Dr. Peter Gott normal. You also have an exem- plary diet and exercise routine. I don’t believe there is cause for concern, but I suggest you talk to your physician about why he is concerned, and why he wants you on a statin. Given your family histo- when I was in my 20s was over 250. All subsequent tests have been between 230 and 260. My HDL is always over 80, often over 100. My LDL varies from low to bor- derline, and my triglycerides are usually low. I take 1 gram flaxseed oil, 1.2 grams omega-3 fish oil and 750 mg niacin daily, and twice daily take 1,200 mg red yeast rice, 630 mg calci- um, 900 mg vitamin D, 150 mg sytrinol and 27 mg iron. A few years ago I was taking 1.5 grams of niacin daily, but my liver panel showed some odd numbers, so I cut down to 750 mg and the oddities disappeared. In short, any diet, supple- ment and lifestyle changes I have made apparently have had no effect on my choles- terol numbers whatsoever. Is there any other way human- ly possible to lower them? My high total makes me uninsurable, despite the pos- itive HDL. My doctor is con- cerned and is encouraging me to try one of the statins, which I am reluctant to do. My father had a multiple bypass with an 85 percent blockage in some arteries when he was exactly my age, but my parents’ genera- tion did not exercise. I’d be interested to hear your thoughts on this. DEAR READER: The answer is fairly simple. Your total cholesterol is high because your HDL is high. HDL — high-density lipoproteins, or “good” cho- lesterol — is responsible for returning excess LDL and VLDL (low- and very-low- density lipoproteins, “bad” cholesterol) back to the liver. Picture your blood vessels as a street. VLDL and LDL are dirt, leaves and trash clog- ging up the road, and HDL is the street sweeper. To the best of my knowl- edge, there is no upper limit to HDL levels. “The higher the better” is what physi- cian’s currently say because HDL levels above 60 are associated with a decreased risk of heart disease. I don’t think you need to worry about your total cho- lesterol numbers. Your HDL is excellent and your LDL and triglycerides are low to ry, perhaps an appointment with a cardiologist is in order just to be sure. There is a familial condition with ele- vated HDL and (paradoxi- cally) an increase in the for- mation of arteriosclerosis. Most of the time, elevated HDL is cardiac-protective, but there is a subset that is not. Perhaps you fall into this category. Remember, just because your doctor wants you to take a medication (any med- ication, from antibiotics to statins to antidepressants) doesn’t mean you have to. What you must be is well informed. Find out what he or she wants you to take, why, and what risks may be present if you refuse. Readers who are interest- ed in learning more can order my Health Report “Understanding Choles- terol” by sending a self- addressed, stamped No. 10 envelope and a $2 U.S. check or money order for each report to Dr. Peter Gott, P.O. Box 433, Lakeville, CT 06039. Be sure to mention the title( or print an order form from my website’s direct link: www.AskDr- GottMD.com/order_form.p df. DEAR DR. GOTT: My mother is 38 years old, weighs 128 pounds and is 5- foot-9. I am 16 years old, weight 135 pounds and am 5-foot-6. She looks bigger than me and does not fit into my clothes, so why do I weigh more than she does? DEAR READER: Two people of the same weight can look drastically differ- ent. One pound of muscle is smaller than one pound of fat, so it is possible for some- one muscular to weigh more than an individual of the same size who isn’t as mus- cular. Perhaps you are sim- ply more muscular than she. Another factor is weight distribution. Everyone car- ries weight differently. A person who carries his or her weight around the middle may need larger sizes than a person of the same weight who has a more evenly dis- tributed weight. Finally, there is bone structure. Women tend to have wider hips than men. Having children may further increase hip width. You may have a bone structure more like your father than your mother, which causes you to carry weight differently. As long as you and your mother exercise regularly and eat a balanced, healthful diet, your weight differences shouldn’t be a concern. Tehama County’s Personal/Professional Service Directory AT YOUR SERVICE! BANKRUPTCY Bankruptcy Clock Repair Free information $50/mo. + court fee MICHAEL O. 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