Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/343136
Is This Deceit Taken? I'm a 54-year-old single man. I've discovered a troubling and apparently rampant trend among people around my age doing online dating — women not being honest about their age. I think the women doing this include the woman I started seeing, whom I otherwise like a lot. She listed her age as 55 but recently got flustered recalling the year she graduated from high school. I got suspicious and looked her up on people finder sites, which list her age as 57. Should I tell her, "Hey, I've been doing a little detective work, and your numbers don't add up"? --Just Trying To Find An Honest Woman I write often about our evolutionary imperatives, like how men evolved to lust after healthy, fertile women — all the better to help them pass on their genes. The features men consider beautiful — like youth, unwrinkled skin and an hourglass figure — are actually indicators of a woman's fertility. And the older and further away a woman gets from peak fertility, the more these features fade and the less desirable she becomes to men. Sure, a woman may grow wiser with age, and she may be a perfectly wonderful and kind person, but as I note in my book, "The penis is not a philanthropic organization and will not get hard because a woman bought a homeless guy a sandwich." You could tell this woman you've caught her in a lie — if your goal is embarrassing her into liking you more. But it isn't like she said she was 30 and turned out to be bumping up against 60. By the way, it isn't just women who engage in attractiveness- improving fibbery. In the male camp, the lies include flashy cars beyond one's means, liberal interpretations of 6'1", Rogaine and the poor man's Rogaine, spray-on "hair." And the reality is, whenever you think you could get serious with a person, you need to look at her character over time — comparing what she says with what she does — to figure out whether she's trustworthy. As you're doing that with this woman, consider taking a counterintuitive approach — calling up a little compassion for where she's coming from. Chances are, she only lied because she figured out where all the honest women are: home alone being 57 instead of having a man like you spirit them off for a romantic weekend at Club Med Guantanamo to waterboard them about their real birthdate. HOROSCOPES ARIES - Mar 21/Apr 20 Aries, you enjoy doing your part to keep your world orderly and balanced. However, into every organized life a little confusion will fall. You will handle it smoothly. TAURUS - Apr 21/May 21 Taurus, so many good things are happening around you that you should enjoy this time as much as you can. It is a time for indulgence and entertainment. GEMINI - May 22/Jun 21 Gemini, you are ready for fun and celebration. Surround yourself with friends and family so the next several days prove even more memorable. CANCER - Jun 22/Jul 22 Cancer, focus on recreation this week. You have earned the right to relax and escape the daily grind, so make the most of your opportunities to do just that. LEO - Jul 23/Aug 23 A welcomed gift will come your way soon, Leo. It may be something big that you have had your eye on for quite some time or something that appeals to your sentimental side. VIRGO - Aug 24/Sept 22 Cast your analytical nature to the side for a few days, Virgo. Embrace sentimentality and emotion this week, as they will help you make the best decisions. LIBRA - Sept 23/Oct 23 Libra, you have a lot of energy going into this week, so tackle any assignments early on. By the end of the week your energy levels may dip, so get to work. SCORPIO - Oct 24/Nov 22 Secrets you have been keeping for some time are ready to come to the surface, Scorpio. These are good secrets, and others will be eager to share them with you. SAGITTARIUS - Nov 23/Dec 21 Don't be nervous if you are a little introspective this week, Sagittarius. Use this time to reflect and find answers to some questions that have been on your mind. CAPRICORN - Dec 22/Jan 20 Whatever is going on at work will still be there tomorrow, Capricorn. If you cannot get all the tasks done, do not beat yourself up over it. Just begin tomorrow with a can-do attitude. AQUARIUS - Jan 21/Feb 18 Aquarius, your mind may wander but it is important to remain as focused as possible. Important information is revealed in the next few days. PISCES - Feb 19/Mar 20 Pisces, a budding relationship appears ready to grow more serious. Take advantage of this opportunity. by CHUCK SHEPPARD Scott Fistler, twice a loser for electoral office in Phoenix, Ariz., as a Republican, decided in November 2013 that his luck might improve as a Democrat with a name change, and legally became "Cesar Chavez," expecting to poll better in a heavily Hispanic, Democratic congressional district. ("Cesar Chavez" is of course the name of the legendary labor organizer.) Furthermore, according to a June report in the Arizona Capitol Times, "Chavez's" campaign website features photographs of frenzied supporters holding "Chavez" signs, but which are obviously scenes from the streets of Venezuela at rallies for its late president Hugo Chavez. (At press time for News of the Weird, a judge had removed "Chavez" from the ballot, but only because some qualifying signatures were invalid. "Chavez" promised to appeal.) [Arizona Capitol Times, 6-2-2014] [Arizona Republic, 6-17-2014] Compelling Explanations U.S. District Judge Richard Kopf of Omaha, Neb., trying to be helpful, he said, advised female lawyers appearing in his courtroom to lower their hemlines and cover their cleavage because males, including Judge Kopf himself, are "pigs." Writing in his personal blog in March, he said, "I have been a dirty old man ever since I was a very young man" and that the women in his office are similarly contemptuous of daringly dressed female lawyers. The lifetime-tenured judge later said he regretted any harm to the judiciary that his remarks might have caused. [Slate.com, 3-27-2014] The National Security Agency admitted in a June court filing that it had disobeyed two judicial orders to stop deleting accusatory evidence in its databases (which judges had ordered preserved to help determine if the NSA was illegally violating privacy laws). The NSA's reasoning for its chutzpah: Its data-gathering systems, it claims, are "too complex" to prevent the automatic deletions routinely programmed into its data, and it cannot reprogram to preserve the data without shutting down its entire intelligence-gathering mission. The challenging party (the Electronic Frontier Foundation) called the NSA's explanation disingenuous and, in fact, further proof that the NSA is incapable of properly managing such massive data-gathering. [The Daily Caller, 6-10-2014] Amy Alkon Chuck Sheppard