Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/247042
Thursday, January 23, 2014 – Daily News Family must seek help for mom showing signs of depression DEAR CAROLYN » Over the past four years, I've watched my mom turn into someone I barely know. She's always been a bit sensitive and emotional, and depression runs in our family. I treated my own depression with therapy and antidepressants in my 20s, so I know how valuable those two tools can be to help you deal. Carolyn My mom Hax has become Ask Carolyn SO sensitive that you can barely talk to her — if you say one thing she doesn't like, she goes into a major passiveaggressive snit or cries hysterically. My dad, brother and I feel like we have to tiptoe around her, but if we bring up our concerns for her well-being, she says we blame her for everything and refuses to talk to us. It's greatly affected our relationship. Where we were once really close, our conversations are now mostly superficial. She is just so angry and unhappy. I've tried to talk to her about getting help, I've offered to research therapists for her, but she won't budge. It's affecting her marriage and her relationship with her children, and I don't know what else to do. — Missing my Mom DEAR MISSING » Talk to your dad, find out just how willing he is to take up the cause of getting her some help. Also try the NAMI Helpline, 1-800-950-NAMI. If you find it helpful, then you can not only apply their suggestions, but also urge your dad and brother to call. Re: Emotional mom: Before calling NAMI, wouldn't it be helpful to call her doctor? Depending on the mom's age, this sounds a lot like what happened to my mom during menopause. She didn't get treated, my dad didn't try to get her to go, and now my sisters and I have VERY strained relationships with her. It's easy to look back now and realize what was happening. — Anonymous DEAR CAROLYN » DEAR ANONYMOUS » The call to NAMI is about exploring possibilities and finding ways to help — including calls to doctors. So, yes, you're right that menopause might be the culprit, but it's one possibility. The staff at NAMI will have experience at spotting common problems, will be able to hear the details of the mother's age and behavior changes, and then will be able to suggest concrete approaches her family can take. Just in general, the reason I suggest hotlines often is that they're a step you can take that involves virtually no commitment — no money, little time, no obligation. So the whole mindset of "before you call the hotline" makes no sense to me, because it's not this bad thing you need to avoid unless you've exhausted every single alternative. Call. Learn something. Make that next step, whatever it is, with a little extra information from someone who very likely has dealt with your problem before. Email Carolyn Hax at tellme@washpost.com, follow her on Facebook at www.facebook.com/ carolyn.hax or chat with her online at noon Eastern time each Friday at www.washingtonpost.com. 5B BABY BLUES Jerry Scott & Rick Kirkman ZITS Jerry Scott & Jim Borgman Brian Crane PICKLES Darby Conley GET FUZZY Sudoku Instructions: The object is to place the numbers 1 to 9 in the empty squares so that each row, each column and each 3x3 box contains the number only once. SHERMAN'S LAGOON Jim Toomey Answer to Previous Puzzle PEARLS BEFORE SWINE Stephan Pastis Celebrity Cipher By Luis Campos Instructions: Celebrity Cipher cryptograms are created from quotations by famous people, past and present. Each letter in the cipher stands for another. Scott Adams DILBERT BIZARRO Horoscope By Bernice Bede Osol THURSDAY, JAN. 23 Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Knowledge will be the defining feature of your future success. Take part in anything that will give you an edge over the competition. A romantic interest will develop swiftly. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — Don't cut corners with legal or financial concerns. Stay informed about any important matters and don't allow stress to wear you down. Aries (March 21-April 19) — A relationship may preoccupy you today. Remain calm and try to be fun and lighthearted. You will be emotional, and it's better to be positive, affectionate and devoted than upset. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — Now is not the time to pause and reflect. Move forward and Dan Piraro ARGYLE SWEATER reach for your goals. Professional matters could work out in your favor if you make an effort. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — Decide what you need to do to update your image. Socializing with someone who interests you romantically will have a positive outcome, but be careful not to move too fast. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — Stop yourself before you overreact and do something you may regret. You will lack important details about a situation that is bothering you. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — Take advantage of any opportunity you have to travel today. If you can't get away, content yourself with research. New information will help you plan your future. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — Do whatever it takes to stay ahead of the curve. Concentrate on your work. Push your proposals forward without reservation. Scott Hilburn Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — Don't let conflicting feelings paralyze you. Make decisions that will eliminate interactions with people who are causing you grief. You are at a crossroads in your life. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — Limitations are evident. If you carry on with your current approach, you will lose your footing. Focus on friends and creative endeavors. Clandestine activities will blow up in your face today. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — You will need to accept help from a capable person. If you go it alone, you won't get off the ground. This is not the time to rely exclusively on your own resources. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — You can't trust anyone else to do your job. If you wish to advance, you must show your worth to those with influence. Business trips are profitable. NEA Crossword