Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/145592
Tuesday, July 23, 2013 – Daily News FEATURES Daughter's sleeping beau irksome He claims he will Dear Annie: use the money to My daughter has buy an engagebeen dating the ment ring and same guy for 11 pay for online years. Three college classes. years ago, she Frankly, I would purchased a townprefer she never house, and he marry him. How moved in. He has terrible sleep Annie's do I prepare myself to react to habits. He claims a possible his ''internal sleep clock'' is by Kathy Mitchell engagement? — not in sync with and Marcy Sugar S l e e p y h e a d ' s Mother-In-Lawthe rest of the world. He stays up most To-Be Dear SMILTB: Sleep nights playing on his computer and has a diffi- disorders can be serious, cult time waking in the but the fact that Rip Van morning. He then spends Winkle has no interest in his weekends trying to seeing a doctor means he catch up on his sleep, would rather maintain staying in bed until late the status quo. You know your afternoon. He claims this already is why he has yet to com- daughter isn't inclined to plete his college degree. listen to your opinions He has a dead-end job about this guy. So pracbecause they tolerate his tice smiling in front of the mirror, because there hours. My daughter has done isn't much else you can research on sleep disor- do. We hope Rip Van has some ders and offered him Winkle names of doctors and redeeming qualities to clinics in the area that make up for his lack of specialize in helping ambition, and one of people, but he refuses to them may be that he loves your daughter a go. My daughter has a great deal. Please try to fantastic job. She is focus on those good intelligent, beautiful, qualities and accept her outgoing and fun, and decision with grace and has a wide circle of fortitude. Dear Annie: I recentfriends who apparently make up for what she ly asked a good friend to doesn't get from Rip Van accompany me to a store Winkle. This lopsided where I needed to make a relationship is not what I return. I wasn't sure the had hoped for her. She manager would be coopdeserves so much more. erative and wanted my She and I have had many friend for support. She discussions about this, declined. I was hurt and now and at one point it negatively affected our rela- wonder whether she is as tionship. Since then, I've good of a friend as I tried to keep my thought. I would have done it for her had she thoughts to myself. She recently told me asked. Am I making too that Rip expects to inher- much of this? — What it some money from an Are Friends For? Dear What: Yes. aunt who recently died. Mailbox Your friend may have her own issues about returning items, and this particular request may have made her terribly uncomfortable. Our friends cannot be all things to us. If she is otherwise good to you, please let her off the hook for this type of activity. Dear Annie: I had to respond to ''Frustrated Cook,'' who admonished children who were picky eaters. My son was like that. Rather than create tension, I decided to cook what he would eat, even if it meant cooking a different dish. I remember my relatives giving me ''the look'' because they thought I was enabling him and that it was my fault he had such a limited palate. As an adult, he is still picky, but now he can explain it to me. He says the texture of certain foods has always been a huge issue for him. He will now try different foods within limits. But he has expressed his gratitude to me for not forcing him to eat or go without. To my relatives and others out there, don't judge unless you know the whole story. — Happy Mom and Son Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.n et, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. Sleep problems have many causes Sometimes the problem is DEAR DOCTOR K: I fall stimulants — stimulant mediasleep just fine, but then I wake cines or an alcoholic "nightcap" up around 4 a.m. It's too early to before bed. Alcohol makes many get up, but I can't fall back people sleepy and helps them asleep. Help! fall asleep. But a few hours into DEAR READER: Practically sleep, alcohol becomes a stimueveryone has sleep problems lant to the brain and causes peooccasionally. And a lot of people ple to awaken easily. have sleep problems often. Sometimes the problem is Sometimes it's trouble falling Dr. K pain. A person with arthritis, for asleep. Sometimes, as in your by Anthony L. case, it's trouble staying asleep. Komaroff, M.D. example, may have joints that ache — not so much that they And sometimes it's just waking up unrefreshed, even though you think are aware of pain during the night, but enough to stimulate the brain. Some peoyou've slept soundly. Sleep doctors call waking up in the ple with this problem sleep a lot better if middle of the night "sleep-maintenance they take an aspirin or acetaminophen insomnia." That's difficulty staying pain pill at bedtime. When depression, life stresses, stimuasleep, particularly waking too early and lants or pain are not the cause, cognitive struggling to get back to sleep. When my patients tell me they keep behavioral therapy (CBT) can be helpful. waking up at night for no good reason, I Working with a therapist, you'll learn ask them if they wake up once or repeat- new ways to think about your sleep probedly. Sometimes they wake up just once, lems and develop better strategies for a few hours before they want to wake up dealing with those problems. For example, you may believe that — as seems to be the case with you. That can be a sign of depression, even in peo- you need eight hours of sleep and that ple who aren't aware that they are you won't be able to function the next day if you don't get that much. Some depressed. At least as often, patients say they people do need an average of eight wake up multiple times at night, not just hours a night, but still can function fine early in the morning. There's no good after one or two nights of less sleep. reason: The dog isn't barking, the baby CBT can help change such beliefs, makisn't crying, a car hasn't driven by the ing it easier to relax and fall back house playing its radio too loud. They asleep. Finally, I've put a list of so-called just wake up. Sometimes the problem is a stressful "sleep hygiene" tips — habits that proday. You lay your head on the pillow, and mote healthful sleep — on my website, events from the day keep streaming AskDoctorK.com. through your brain. You'll benefit from Dr. Komaroff is a physician and relaxation techniques. We've discussed those before in this column, so no more professor at Harvard Medical School. To detail here. Consider meditation, deep send questions, go to AskDoctorK.com, breathing, progressive muscle relaxation or write: Ask Doctor K, 10 Shattuck St., Second Floor, Boston, MA 02115. or biofeedback. Campground to close for reconstruction YREKA – Martins Dairy Campground, a six-site campground on the Goosenest Ranger District, will be closed Aug. 10 through late-September for reconstruction. The campground is about 12 miles west of Macdoel. The campground will be closed to protect visitor safety throughout the project's duration while heavy-equipment operates in the area. The Martins Dairy Horse Campground will remain open during construction. Anyone in the general vicinity during this time frame should use extra caution and be alert for construction equipment. This campground update will improve facilities and help meet accessibility standards. Work will include campsite leveling and road improvement. When completed, the campground will offer new picnic tables, fire rings, grills, trash receptacles and barriers to protect the adjacent meadow. This project is jointly funded by the Klamath National Forest and Secure Rural Schools Program Title II funds. For more information about this and other campgrounds on the Klamath NF, visit: http://www.fs.usda.gov/activity/klamath/recreation/campingcabins/?recid=13053&actid=29. 3B