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2A – Daily News – Wednesday, July 28, 2010 Community people&events Walmart donates Are you addicted to approval? I started a new book club in town. Our first book was Approval Addiction, Overcoming Your Need To Please Everyone, by Joyce Meyer. Boy was it a great book. One for the ages. In my line of work, it is hard to make everyone happy. Jack Can- field said it best when he said, "some will, some won't, so what." Another favorite "the need to be popular will steal your destiny" by Meyer herself. Courtesy photo Walmart Manager Niecha Walker, right, presents a $1,000 check to Boy Scout Mark Olsen, troop 119. The grant money was given by the Walmart Foundation upon recommendation from the Walmart Distribution Center in Red Bluff. The grant will provide opportunities to send care packages to US Army Troops serving in Iraq and Afghanistan. “Walmart is committed to helping address unmet needs in the communities where we serve,”Walker said. “Our support for Boy Scout Troop 119 underscores this commitment, and we are hopeful that through our grant, residents in Red Bluff will continue to support the Boy Scouts.” SECRET WITNESS 529-1268 A program of Tehama County Neighborhood Watch Program, Inc. Setting it straight –––––––– It is the policy of the Daily News to correct as quickly as possible all errors in fact that have been published in the newspaper. If you feel a factual error has been made in a news story, call the news department at 527-2153. As a student of the successful, one of the mysteries I am interested in is the ability to walk forward in faith when you are under fire. One only needs to look at the check-out stand to see this weeks, blast on last weeks, golden child plastered all over the rag mags. So and so is fat, so and so is a cheater, so and so has wrinkles. It is no wonder society has become so comfortable with bully- ing at all levels. For three years I have been teaching that everything in life just "is" until we attach meaning to it. Well, a human being just "is" until we attach meaning to them. The problem with that is that the mean- ing is skewed by our perceptions, flaws, needs and expecta- tions. As humans, there simply is no way that we can be all things to all people all the time. The best we can do is focus on what we can do to be the healthiest, most stable person possible. Make the best choices for you. Know who you are and what you believe in and make your life's deci- sions based on your path. No doubt there will be people who do not agree with you, embrace you or share your enthusiasm for all things ‘you’. The fact is, we cannot control other people. We can only control ourselves. We can't defend our- selves out of other people's judg- ments, condemnations or make them accept us and we shouldn't want to. At some point, we live enough life, weather enough storms and survive enough setbacks to realize the simple fact that not everyone is going to approve of us. Faydra Rector Life Coach The main focus of the book is that it is up to you to change your perceptions about yourself. Once you do and you embrace who you are, you do not see everything in life as acceptance or rejection. It isn't either peo- ple like you or they don't. It is somewhere between live and let live and your per- ceptions of me do not have to be my reality. Love yourself, love oth- ers and let go of the limit- ing belief that if people don't approve of you it is your problem. If you want to join our group, friend me on facebook at Faydra & Com- pany-Success Coaching. Faydra Rector, MA is a mental health administrator, author, public speaker, educator and life coach who lives in Red Bluff. She can be reached at lifecoach@shasta.com or view her blogs at http://faydraandcompany.blogspot. com/ and http://allaboutdivorce.blogspot.com . Hubby’s heirs hijack housing hopes Dear Annie: I am 55 and have been married to Jim, age 73, for five years. Jim’s wife died six years before we met, and his two children became furi- ous when he began dating, saying he was being unfaithful. They badgered Jim until he deeded them his house and property. Jim also gave each kid $250,000 in cash and paid off the mortgages on their homes. The deeds specify that Jim can stay on the property as long as he lives, but make no provision for a surviving spouse. accept my apology. Was I out of line? What about his kids? Is there any hope for this family? — Tired of Drama Dear Tired: Jim is worn Annie’s Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar D NEWSAILY HOW TO REACH US RED BLUFF TEHAMACOUNTY THE VOICE OF TEHAMA COUNTY SINCE 1885 VOLUME 125, NUMBER 213 On the Web: www.redbluffdailynews.com MAIN OFFICE: Monday-Friday, 9 a.m. - 5 p.m. Main Phone (530) 527-2151 Outside area 800-479-6397 545 Diamond Ave. Red Bluff, CA 96080 ______________________ Fax: (530) 527-5774 ______________________ Mail: Red Bluff Daily News P.O. Box 220 Red Bluff, CA 96080 CUSTOMER SERVICE: Subscription & delivery Monday-Friday, 8 a.m. - 5 p.m. (530) 527-2151 Ext. 125 subscription rates (All prices include all applicable taxes) Monday through Saturday $9.59 four weeks Rural Rate $10.69 four weeks Business & professional rate $2.21 four weeks, Monday-Friday By mail: In Tehama County $12.29 four weeks All others $16.23 four weeks (USPS 458-200) Published Monday through Saturday except Sunday, by California Newspaper Partnership. Home delivery NEWS News Tip Hotline: 527-2153 FAX: (530) 527-9251 E-mail: clerk@redbluffdailynews.com Daytime: Sports: Obituaries: Tours: (530) 527-2151 Ext. 111 Ext. 103 Ext. 112 After hours:(530) 527-2153 ______________________ ADVERTISING Monday-Friday, 9 a.m. - 5 p.m. Display: 527-2151 Ext. 122 Classified: 527-2151 Ext. 103 Online (530) 527-2151 Ext. 133 FAX: (530) 527-5774 E-mail: advertise@redbluffdailynews.com SPECIAL PAGES ON THE FOLLOWING DAYS Mondays: Kids Corner Tuesdays: Employment Wednesdays: Business Thursdays: Entertainment Fridays: Select TV Saturdays: Farm, Religion Publisher & Advertising Director: Greg Stevens gstevens@redbluffdailynews.com Editor: Chip Thompson editor@redbluffdailynews.com Sports Editor: Rich Greene sports@redbluffdailynews.com Circulation Manager: Kathy Hogan khogan@redbluffdailynews.com Production Manager: Sandy Valdivia sandy@redbluffdailynews.com newspaper of general circulation, County of Tehama, Superior Court Decree 9670, May 25, 1955 © 2010 Daily News The Red Bluff Daily News is an adjudicated daily 90 years ago... Red Cross Nurse On Job In Early September The executive committee of the Tehama coun- ty chapter of the Red Cross last night instructed the secretary to employ Miss Sophia M. Balch as countywide nurse and she will be on the job in September. She was chief nurse at the base hos- pital in Camp Kearney for several months and then went to France as chief nurse at Base Hos- pital 47 unit. – Daily News, July 28, 1920 When we married, Jim asked the kids to allow me to continue to live there after he dies, but they refused. After that, whenever the kids asked for money, Jim told them it was time they lived within their means. (They have good jobs.) They became hostile and accused Jim of choosing me over them. They have not allowed him to see the grandchildren for three years. The only time they speak to him is to demand he divorce me. Without telling Jim, I sent both his children a polite e-mail asking what it would take for us to be a family again. They told Jim about the letter, and he accused me of interfering in his relationship with his kids, saying it was none of my business and I have ‘‘ruined all possibility of reconciliation.’’ I was shocked by his reaction, but apolo- gized. However, Jim will not down from fighting with his kids, defending his marriage and missing his grandchil- dren. Although your inten- tions were good, the e-mail was the straw that broke the camel’s back. His selfish children used it as an excuse to attack him in force. Ask Jim to go with you for counseling to see whether your relationship can withstand the pressure. If he won’t go, go without him. Dear Annie: My best friend is having an online affair. She feels it is only a minor form of cheating since they are not meeting in real life. Frankly, in my book, it’s cheating all the way around. I told her that if her husband asks me about it, I will not lie to him. But I am so uncomfortable with the situation that I no longer call her or visit their home. Even if she were to stop e-mailing this guy, I still would not lie to her husband if he asked why we’ve stopped speaking. Is this friendship a write- off? — Confused in California Dear Confused: It certainly sounds like it. Your friend is behaving terribly, and we agree that you should not be a party to her lies. The most you can do is suggest she get into counseling with her husband so they can figure out why she is willing to risk her marriage for her online buddy. Otherwise, keep your distance. Dear Annie: I would like to respond to ‘‘V.W.,’’ who has an autistic child and whose relatives don’t understand how demanding it is. I have three children, one of whom has already been diagnosed with Asperger’s and the other two are showing similar traits. I found support through my child’s school and the local county services. The county provides respite care, and the school has special classes where I have made friends with other parents. Also, I discovered care.com and sitterci- ty.com, where you can search for trustworthy sitters in your area, some of whom may have experi- ence dealing with autistic children. A starting point is asking the school nurse, school counselors or family doctors what services are available in your area. Support makes a big difference. — N.Y. Dear N.Y.: Thank you. Web- sites like the ones you listed pro- vide child care, senior care, pet sit- ters, housekeeping services and even tutors. We appreciate the information. Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. Hawaiian Days Sidewalk Sale to be held Red Bluff's downtown Hawaiian Days Sidewalk Sale is scheduled to start at 9 a.m. Aug. 6-7. There will be lots of specials, taste treats, prizes and a fun time for all. Ehorn's Antiques will offer samples of Hawaiian punch to enjoy while shopping the sidewalk spe- cials at all the downtown stores. Drawings are planned in many participating stores, including a Hawaiian meal for four cooked and donated by Karen Harvey of California Kitchen. Irene Fuller of Heartfelt Designs is donating a Patagonia Hawaiian shirt and a Patagonia bicycle tote bag, both valued at more than $100. The planters on Main Street will feature the Hawaiian theme and signs advertising the event. Windows are decorated with the theme. Downtown Red Bluff is encouraging all crafters, entertainers and non-profit organizations to join in this event. For more information, call Joanne Ehorn at 527- 0360 or 527-4629. Corning Tea Party The Corning Tea Party Patriots will hold a “Support Arizona and Legal Immigration Rally” at 4:30 p.m. Thursday, at the corners of Edith Avenue and Solano Street. For information on SB 1070, visit www.securetheborder.org. The public welcome. The group meets 6-8 p.m. Thursdays at the Corn- ing Senior Center, 1015 Fourth St. For information on the rally, call Patty Smith at 427-4126 or on the Patri- ots call Dean Blankenship at 824-2332. Jack the Ribber Come by for the Best Lunch in town • Ribs •Tri-Tip • Pulled Pork • Specials Mon.-Fri. 11am-8pm Sat. 4-9pm 1150 Monroe St. 527-6108