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2B Daily News – Saturday, June 1, 2013 FEATURES Couple worries about being cared for ment community are more Dear Annie: I am 73, likely to care for one anothand my wife is 68. We've er. been married 36 years, and Should we stop being so we are healthy, active concerned with what the churchgoers. My wife had children need and want and two young children when put our priorities first? Do we married, and our son, you think we are overly sen''Cal,'' is now 34. We have sitive about them having the helped all three of our kids financially, as well as with Annie's in-law families nearby and therefore not needing us? babysitting, yard work, etc. Should we stop changing And we are frugal, partly so we can leave as much by Kathy Mitchell our busy schedules when money to the kids as possi- and Marcy Sugar they call to babysit on short notice? — Pa and Ma ble. Like many their age, Dear Pa and Ma: If you want to they are busy and financially on the live near the grandchildren, that is a edge despite decent incomes. Eight years ago, at retirement, valid reason to move. But please do we moved across the state to be not plan your future around which closer to my stepchildren to help child you believe will take care of with and be nearer to the grandchil- you. You don't really know. Plan as dren. They are now three hours if you had only yourself to rely on. away, and although they don't hesi- Everything else is gravy. But if you tate to call us to babysit, they only want to see your step-grandchilvisit us once a year on the holidays. dren, we don't recommend you turn Yet, they enjoy their nearby in-laws down babysitting jobs if your health allows you to go. We know the on a regular basis. Last year, Cal moved across the favoritism hurts, but being jealous country and married. At that time, of the other in-laws serves no purhis half-siblings were heard saying pose. Dear Annie: Last year, my 92they ''don't need us anymore,'' and in fact, my stepchildren recently year-old mother came to live with suggested we move closer to Cal. us. It was a huge adjustment, and While we enjoy Cal and know he we have made many changes in our would care for us, moving would be lifestyle and living space. Mom has a huge expense. Moving closer to been diagnosed with short-term the stepchildren would also incur memory loss and mild dementia. expense, but the main problem with She also has some health issues. But living closer is that we are less com- she is very sweet and can carry on a fortable with them. Their lives are coherent conversation. Recently, some friends spent too frenetic. We also realize that friends and neighbors in our retire- time with us. The husband insisted Mailbox that my mother is more aware than my husband and I give her credit for. But he is not here when she forgets to turn the water off, puts aluminum pans in the microwave and cancels her insurance coverage. He wasn't here when she started a fire. I want to tell everyone who thinks they know more than the caretakers: You don't live in the home with the elderly parent and do not know the whole story. — The Daughter Dear Daughter: Some people feel an overwhelming need to display their ''knowledge,'' even when they are ill-informed. It is not as flattering to them as they may believe. Dear Annie: As an otolaryngologist, I could not overlook the letter from ''Native New Yorker'' about a hoarse and gravelly voice. While ''Native'' did not ask for advice about the voice, I would like to tell readers who have unexplained hoarseness existing for two weeks or more to have their vocal cords examined by an ENT doctor. The problem may be quite correctable, or it may be a sign of cancer of the larynx. — Illinois Otolaryngologist Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. Rocking retirement By Jennifer Cooper Social Security Manager in Redding Generations ago, retirement was thought of as a time to take it easy — a time of rocking on porch chairs and reminiscing about the good old days. But that's not the case with the current generation of retirees. In fact, many older people today continue to rock on. Just look at some of the superstars touring and performing concerts this year who are old enough to collect Social Security retirement payments. They're still rocking, but not in chairs. Bob Dylan is on tour, as he usually is during summer months. Dylan is 71 years old. But with a recent album and new tour dates, you'd never know he was of retirement age. Neil Young is touring with Crazy Horse to support their new album. The "godfather of grunge" is 67 years young. He's become the "Old Man" he sang about in his Harvest days. Paul McCartney's current "Out There" tour may more appropriately be called his "Up There" tour. The former Beatle is now age 70. Willie Nelson is "On the Road Again." The music icon is 79 years old and seems to be on nonstop tour. Aretha Franklin is 71. Carlos Santana is 65. Carly Simon is 67. Mick Jagger and Keith Richards are both 69, as is Joni Mitchell. Leonard Cohen is 78. B.B. King is 87. They're all still performing their music. Of course, some of these well-known musicians may not be eligible to receive Social Security benefits. But all of them are of retirement age. So where are their rocking chairs and knitting needles? It's hard to believe, looking at all of these mature stars, that retirement used to be associated with bridge and shuffleboard. It's not just musicians. In fact, many people decide to put off applying for retirement benefits. And even after they do begin collecting benefits, many "retirees" prefer to keep working — or at least moving and shaking. Most people know that you can begin collecting early Social Security benefits at age 62, with a reduction in the monthly amount. The full retirement age is gradually going up from 66 for people born between 1943 and 1954, to 67 for people born in 1960 and later. You can delay retirement even further and receive a higher payment when you retire, up until you reach age 70. And another thing that has changed since the past generation: you can continue to work and still receive retirement benefits. Learn more about Social Security retirement benefits by reading our publication on the subject at www.socialsecurity.gov/pubs. When you're ready to retire, the best place to apply is from the comfort of your home computer, with some of your favorite music blaring in the background. Begin the process with our Retirement Planner at www.socialsecurity.gov/r etirement. Crank up the tunes, and start planning before you head out to your next concert. HOME SERVICES DIRECTORY Online: Publishes 24/7 $ 109 Print and Online Per Month No early cancellation, non-refundable Building Construction Burrows Construction Three additional online locations at no extra cost! In Print Every Tues. - Thurs.- Sat. Construction R. G. 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Certain DEAR READER: It sounds like Komaroff, M.D. physical characteristics, such as flat you have what is called patellofemoral feet, can also contribute. Pain-free exercise is the pain. That's pain where your kneecap (patella) cornerstone of treatment. meets your thighbone A workout plan to relieve (femur). It usually results or prevent patellofemoral from overdoing exercise. pain should focus on Fortunately, there's a lot improving strength and you can do to prevent and flexibility in the tissues around the knee. (I've put relieve this pain. To understand this con- a selection of appropriate dition, here's a brief exercises on my website, anatomy lesson. Sit in a AskDoctorK.com.) Work chair, and then lift up your with a physical therapist, foot (on either leg) and who can design an indihold your leg straight out. vidualized exercise proHow were you able to do gram for you. While you're recoverthis? A big muscle in the front of your thigh (your ing, don't do anything that quadriceps, or "quads") is causes pain. If you run, attached to a tough ten- avoid hills, go for shorter don. The tendon is like a distances or substitute cord; it runs over the top other activities. Avoid of your knee and attaches high-impact exercises and to the biggest bone in your squatting or kneeling. lower leg, the tibia. When Don't wear high heels or your quadriceps muscle sit with your legs bent for shortens and tugs on the too long. Ice and nonsteroidal tendon, it lifts up your anti-inflammatory drugs lower leg and foot. In the middle of the such as ibuprofen (Motrin, tendon, right over the others) or naproxen sodiknee, is a small bone: the um (Aleve, others) can patella, or kneecap. It pro- help ease immediate pain. tects the bones of the knee If you have flat feet, you joint by putting a hard may need additional arch bone in front of them to support. 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