Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/13138
8A – Daily News – Friday, July 9, 2010 Moocher making mother mad Kidney disease means dietary restrictions Dear Annie: My husband, my son and I live with my mother-in-law. She’s been divorced for nine years. I know Mom deserves companionship, but one night last month, she went out with the girls and decided to bring a guy home. We thought it was going to be a one- night stand, but ‘‘Stan’’ hasn’t left since that night. Stan is only two years older than my husband. He’s been eating our food and using our toiletries and seems to have made himself quite comfortable. I’m a stay-at-home mom, and while my husband and his mother are at work, Stan hangs around making moves on me. I’ve told my husband, but he refuses to believe the guy is hitting on me. Annie’s Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar grandson, and that you want Stan out. The longer he stays, the harder it will be. If she refuses, we hope you will start sav- ing your money. Your family needs its own space. Dear Annie: My younger brother just cele- brated his 18th birthday. He’s smart, personable and a decent-looking guy, although a bit nerdy. My concern is that he’s never had a girlfriend or even indicated any interest in the opposite sex. He says he is dedicated to his schoolwork, so we sel- dom, if ever, bring up the topic. Stan is also sneaky. The other day, I caught him siphoning gas from my husband’s hobby hotrod in the garage. I know he is taking advantage of us. My mother-in-law insists he’s harmless. What do I do? I’m tired of keeping my mouth shut. — Annoyed and Ignored Dear Annoyed: Why are you keeping your mouth shut? You have a child living with you, and he should not be subjected to any of this nonsense. Have your husband tell his mother that this is an unhealthy arrangement for everyone, particularly her What I fear is that he may be secretly gay and afraid to come out. I’d accept my brother regard- less of his orientation, but I worry he may have some anxiety. Is it unusual for someone his age to have no interest in either gen- der? Should I be worried? — B.C. Dear B.C.: You are making a lot of assump- tions that seem unwarrant- ed. Yes, your brother could be secretly gay, and there is also a small per- centage of the population that is asexual — not interested at all. But we suspect your brother is simply biding his time. Many 18-year-olds aren’t ready to date, and a guy who is ‘‘a bit nerdy’’ may have approaching and attracting difficulty girls and may be too embarrassed to discuss it with his family. These guys often do better socially when they are in college. We suggest you occasionally offer him some pointers to help him be more confident. Other- wise, just be his friend. If he needs to talk, he’ll come to you. Dear Annie: This is in response to ‘‘Devastated and Frustrated.’’ When our son married 32 years ago, our family welcomed his wife with genuine love, but it soon became appar- ent that she wanted little to do with us. After our grandsons were born, con- tact became even less fre- quent. They moved far away. The grandsons visit- ed us without their parents twice in 12 years. Their last visit ended when I asked my son if his kids could visit their great- grandma in the nursing home. He exploded and stormed out, and we haven’t seen them since. They told the boys and his in-laws that I kicked them out of our house. That was 20 years ago. We assume our son is still alive. We pray for his family every day, asking God to change their hearts. I am 74, and my husband is 77. We hope to see them again before we die. — Another Devastat- ed Grandma Dear Grandma: How heartbreaking for all con- cerned. We can only hope and pray that your son sees this letter and picks up the phone. DEAR DR. GOTT: I have been diagnosed with chronic kidney dis- ease. I was shocked when the nephrologist told me this, as I have no symptoms. I decided I would get a second opinion. The second doctor said my first diagnosis was correct and put me on a strict low- sodium, low-phosphorus, low-pro- tein diet with very few things I could eat. I went back to the first nephrologists, who said, with all the trials done on the kidneys, it was found that I wouldn’t live one day longer on the diet. She said instead to limit my protein somewhat and to watch my sodium. What is your feeling on this strict diet? I’m a 76-year-old woman. I am hav- ing surgery soon to provide an access, as it takes six months for it to heal so I can have dialysis. Dr. Peter Gott amount of red meats, eggs and milk products in your diet. It’s not necessary to delete them, but to lessen your consumption. Fresh fruits, vegetables, cereals or breads might act as substitutes. Foods high in potassium include bananas, potatoes and tomatoes. An easy transition might be made to substitute apples, carrots, grapes and green beans. A sodium reduc- tion can be accomplished by avoiding canned soups and vegeta- bles, fast foods, processed luncheon meats, hot dogs, kielbasa, cookies made with trop- ical oils and countless other products. Here is where education and label-reading come into play. DEAR READER: Chronic kidney dis- ease is the gradual loss of kidney function. Conditions such as diabetes, kidney stones, enlarged prostate, vasculitis and hyperten- sion are often associated with the disorder. The kidneys filter waste and excess flu- ids from the blood that are excreted in urine. With chronic kidney failure, waste products cannot be eliminated as readily, resulting in an accumulation in the blood. This causes dangerous chemical imbal- ances to occur. While there is no cure, treatment can help reduce any complica- tions and slow the progression of the dis- ease. Treatment might begin with controlling the hypertension, taking prescription drugs to lower cholesterol levels, supplementing calcium and vitamin D to protect your bones, diuretics to rid the body of excess fluid buildup or the inclusion of a low-pro- tein diet. A dietician will likely be recom- mended to review your diet and suggest methods by which your kidneys will not have to work so hard. This might include reducing your salt intake and eating foods lower in potassium. What your first nephrologist recommended was to have you incorporate a diet that would reduce the amount of work required of the kid- neys. Protein reduction includes lowering the Progressing to the later stages of the dis- ease, dialysis, of which there are two types, might be recommended. The first is hemodialysis and involves pumping blood out of the body and into a machine that acts as a healthy kidney would. Once the waste is removed, the blood is pumped back into the body. The second type is peritoneal dialysis, which pumps a solution into the abdominal cavity and utilizes the body’s blood vessels to transport the waste prod- ucts and additional fluids to the abdominal cavity, where the solution absorbs them. That solution is then pumped out of the body, taking the unwanted waste and fluids with it. A final option is kidney transplant from a healthy donor. To provide related information, I am sending you a copy of my Health Report “Kidney Disorders.” Other readers who would like a copy should send a self- addressed stamped No. 10 envelope and a $2 check or money order to Newsletter, P.O. Box 167, Wickliffe, OH 44092-0167. Be sure to mention the title or print an order form off my website at www.AskDr- GottMD.com. Dr. Peter H. Gott is a retired physician and the author of several books, including “Live Longer, Live Better,” “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Diet” and “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Cookbook,” which are available at most bookstores or online. 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