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JUNE 21-27, 2017 UCW 5 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM Small Things Come in Little Packages by PITT DICKEY OPINION In theory, Higgs Boson is what gives the universe mass. Schrodinger's cat PITT DICKEY, Columnist. COMMENTS? Editor@upandcomin- gweekly.com. 910.484.6200. For reasons totally without merit, today we shall mangle the curious world of quantum physics. Quantum physics is the study of how atoms, mol- ecules and even smaller itty-bitty atomic particles react with each other. It's a weird place down there in subatomic land. Take a moment away from your iPhone and the pictures of cats playing pianos. Come enter a land where a cat can be both alive and dead at the same time. You are now traveling through another dimension beyond that which is known to man. It is the middle ground between light and shadow; between science and superstition. You have just crossed over into the Quantum Zone. Consider, if you will, the strange inhabitants of the Quantum Zone who have names that would fit comfortably in Middle Earth or among feuding fami- lies living in the deepest hollows of West Virginia. You will meet six different flavors of Quarks: up, down, bottom, top, strange and charmed. If you have spent your entire life without meeting a Charmed Quark, then today is your lucky day. e Quantum Zone has a tribe of Leptons — electrons, neutrinos, muons, muon neutrinos, and tau neutrinos. ere is a passel of Bosons — Z Boson and Weak Boson — and eight tiny different types of Gluons. But who is the leader of the subatomic club that's made for you and me? H-I-G-G-S B-O-S-O-N. Forever let us hold Higgs Boson high, high, high. As Otis Red- ding once sang about James Brown in "Sweet Soul Music," "Spotlight on Higgs Boson now/ He's the king of them all, yeah/ He's the king of them all, y'all/ Oh yeah oh yeah." e mighty Higgs Boson wasn't actually dis- covered until 2012. In theory, Higgs is what gives the universe mass. Without the Higgs Boson our universe might not exist. As Forest Gump once said, "at's all I have to say about that." Like Donald Trump keeps telling us, just trust me, I'll explain it all to you very soon. e Higgs Boson is the very beauti- ful President of the Universe. ere are some other weird sisters making up the Quantum Zone who are so reclusive that they haven't been discovered yet. Physicists think they are out there and have already named them. ere is likely something called a Gravitron. e Gravitron is not the ride at the State Fair or the secret ingredient that makes gravy in Gravy Train dog food. e Gravi- ton is a building block of our old friend gravity. As we all know, gravity is not just a good idea; it's the law. ere is an undiscovered something which has been named the Magnetic Monopole. You might think that is a type of one-legged tadpole that would stick to the iron. You would be wrong. A Magnetic Monopole has something to do with magnetism. ose of you of a certain age will remember Dick Tracy in the funny papers used to constantly remind us: "e nation that controls magnetism will control the universe." I, for one, will never, ever dispute any- thing Dick Tracy says. If Dick Tracy says it, I believe it. And that settles it. e most confusing item in the subatomic box is Schrodinger's cat. According to Professor Schro- dinger, in the Quantum Zone, an atom can exist in a bunch of different states at the same time which can lead to totally different outcomes. is is called superposition, which is not, in fact, a yoga pose. e atom remains in superposition until it is ob- served by someone who is not a subatomic particle. After being observed, the superposition makes up its mind and takes a final form. Here is where Schro- dinger's cat comes in. Put a cat in a steel box with a Geiger counter with a tiny radioactive blob. ere is an equal chance the blob will decay or not decay during an hour. If it decays, then a hammer will break a glass tube full of acid, and the cat will die. If the blob doesn't decay, the cat lives. To a normal person pondering the welfare of the cat, the cat is either alive or dead. ere is no Mr. In Between. But in the Quantum Zone, the cat can be either alive or dead because the radioactive blob may or may not have been released. We won't know if the cat has used up all its lives until we open the box. If you can understand Schrodinger's cat illustration as to the wonders of the Quantum Zone, you may award yourself several gold stars. As the King of Siam said, "To me, it is a puzzlement." Before you call PETA to report possible harm to Schroding- er's cat, please understand that no cats were harmed during the writing of this column.