Issue link: http://www.epageflip.net/i/715527
DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman THEDUPLEX GlennMcCoy ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARAMY»Mywifeof many years has been engaging in secret phone conversations with an old boyfriend. She lied to me when I talked with her about it, but then admitted she had been talking with him, after I produced the proof from the records. She gave me a poor explanation that she didn't want to alarm me since the two of them were just catching up. I didn't believe her story and told her that she could have had such conversations with him in the open, if she had just told me that was all she wanted to do. Today she acknowl- edged that she still has romantic feelings for him after all these years. I am heartbroken that she was dishonest in betraying our marriage. What's going to happen next? I don't know how she could do this after many years of a loving marriage. There must be a prob- lem with our marriage that has never been ap- parent to me. We have kids and grandchildren and I can't believe that she would give that all up. Is a marriage coun- selor likely to be of help, if my wife is really in denial? She acts as if she has done nothing wrong. —T DEAR T » Your wife is acting like she has done nothing wrong because she is trying to gaslight you into believing that YOU are reacting irratio- nally. This technique is designed to throw you off and make you feel worse about yourself than you do about her. It is the first line of defense of toddlers and errant spouses. Don't fall for it. I disagree with you that she is "in denial" about her actions. I suspect she knows how thi s i s aff ecti ng yo u, bu t doesn't want to admit it. You get to feel the way you feel about this, and your wife does not have the right to invalidate your feelings. By revealing the depths of your hurt, you may be opening up to her in a way that could help your relationship. Is she bored, ignored, or self-medicating her way through a mid/ late-life crisis? Does this expose a rift in your rela- tionship? Does she want to leave, and if she stays, is she willing to work on your relationship? These are questions you should tackle in counseling. Counseling alone cannot save your marriage, but it can help the two of you to save your marriage. DEAR AMY » The letter from "Feeling Hurt" out- lined a situation where grandparents favored one set of grandchildren over another. We are grand- parents who would prob- ably be accused of this, but the fact is that one set of grandchildren is simply more available (and ap- pealing) than the others. We finally gave up. — We H ave Fa vorit es DEAR FAVORITES » It can sometimes be very chal- lenging to connect with grandchildren, but I feel sorry for your excluded grandchildren, your justi- fication notwithstanding. Husband figures out wife has reconnected with old lover You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribpub.com and follow her on Twitter @askingamy. Amy Dickinson Ask Amy Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Leo(July23-Aug.22)— Network with peers and share your experience. Don't let the actions of others upset you or cause you to leave your plans incomplete. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — Participate in events that involve colleagues or deal with changes going on in your indus- try. The people you meet will expand your knowledge. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — If you listen to what your emo- tions are trying to tell you, you will know what you have to do. A positive personal change will occur through communication. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — Expressing feelings will give others the opportunity to share. Together, you can find solutions that will help you move forward. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — Consider your income options and look for alternatives that will help you make more doing something you enjoy or are good at. A change of loca- tion or of colleagues is favored. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — You can offer someone help, but not at the expense of forgo- ing a chance to make personal gains. Make suggestions, but don't take on responsibilities that don't belong to you. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Put energy and enthusi- asm behind your plans in order to improve your current work situation. Taking on addi- tional responsibility will impress someone influential. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — A situation you face will require patience, understand- ing and the time and space to unfold naturally in order to turn out favorably. Good things will develop if given the chance. Aries (March 21-April 19) — An enthusiasm for experi- mentation accompanied by hard work and discipline will pay off. Giving back to your community by volunteering your time will also lead to interesting new friendships. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — Don't give in to emotional manipulation or be made to feel guilty. Surround yourself with people who think the same way you do. Listen to an expert and apply what you learn. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — You won't see eye-to-eye with the people you interact with. Listen carefully and go about your business. You'll gain the most by working alone. Avoid temptation and indulgence. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — Go with the flow and see what happens. Your ability to adapt to the changes going on around you will be to your benefit. A romantic gesture is encouraged. Horoscope By Eugenia Last TUESDAY, AUG. 16 TUESDAY,AUGUST16,2016 REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM |YOURDAILYBREAK | 3 B