Up & Coming Weekly

November 24, 2015

Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.

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NOVEMBER 25 - DECEMBER 1, 2015 UCW 19 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM ADVICE GODDESS Sweeping Beauty My new boyfriend is messy. He drops his socks, underwear and clothing on the floor by the bed. He's not lazy or entitled, just a spacehead. It's no big deal for me to pick this stuff up, as I feel like I'm showing him love by caretaking. However, he says his ex said she didn't mind, either, and then was screaming about his socks eight months later. Is that my future? — Worried At first, such behaviors can seem oddly endearing — as does a new boyfriend's abandoning his socks instead of making that harrowing 62.5-inch trek to the hamper. In time, however, a woman can start having some less-than-constructive ideas. You know, little things, like nailing his socks and underwear to the floor or perhaps lying in wait for him to drop something and then spraying him with a water bottle like a cat on the counter. But as your boyfriend's letting his socks fall to the bedroom rug like snow, do you think he's all "Ha, I'll show her!" — or more "Pillow, here I come!"? The air bag against resenting him is love — not love as a mere feeling but love as an activity, an action you choose to take. Assuming your guy's basically a good person who loves you, try to behave as if you haven't forgotten that you love him. Even when you hate him a little. Unfortunately, change is hard. Behaviors become habits, and the personality traits that contribute to them are biologically driven. However, psychologist Art Markman explains that we can structure our environment to help us reshape our behavior. In Smart Change, he advises building a reminder to do a desired behavior into your environment in a way that it can't be avoided. Upon repeating a new behavior about 20 times, you create the beginnings of a new habit. In your situation, this could even be fun. Each night for a few weeks, leave a sheet of paper with a different message on his pillow, maybe starting with a Magic Markered smiling cartoon hamper saying, "Feed meeee!" (One night, you could even tuck the hamper in under the covers.) Should you fail to amuse him out of his laundry-leaving ways, try to maintain perspective. Consider the idiocy of some people who say they'll do "anything" for love: move, quit, give up the British throne (sadly, a moot point for most of us). Their stance only changes once they have love — at which point "anything" involves stopping just short of picking up a small fabric item from the rug. Copyright AMY ALKON WEEKLY HOROSCOPES NEWS OF THE WEIRD by CHUCK SHEPPARD Fort Bragg, North Carolina, declared an emergency on Oct. 30 when one of its soldiers had the bright idea to arrive for a Halloween party on base dressed as a suicide bomber, with realistic-looking canisters in a wired vest. Gates to the post (headquarters of Army Special Forces and airborne troops) immediately went into extended lockdown, and a bomb-disposal team was called. The soldier's name was not released. [Army Times, 11-2-2015] Ewwww, Gross! The Blackhead Whisperer: Upland, California, dermatologist Sandra Lee is a social media cult figure with a massive audience on YouTube, where her cyst- and pimple-popping videos (charmingly, soothingly narrated) have garnered 170 million views. (The "Popping" community, on the Reddit.com site, has more than 60,000 members.) Dr. Lee admits longing for "the perfect blackhead," which to her apparently means one that is photogenic and slides out easily from its snug epidermal home. Several "Popping" fanatics told a Washington Post reporter that watching the videos is therapy for anxiety, but one fan (a "Mr. Wilson") apparently gets his "therapy" by submitting videos of his own — unsoothing — oil-laden bursts. [Washington Post, 10-29-2015] While hopeful Italian surgeon Sergio Canavero seeks funding to perform the first ever head "transplant" (with a patient already lined up), Australian doctor Geoff Askin (the country's "godfather of spinal surgery") recently successfully "reattached" the head of a 16-month-old boy who was badly injured in a traffic accident. The toddler's head was described as internally "relocated" and reset onto the vertebra, using wire and rib tissue to graft the head back in place. (Nonetheless, the operation was widely regarded as a "miracle.") [Daily Mail (London), 8-22-2015] [7 News Melbourne via Fox News, 10-3-2015] Police Report "Police Squad!" Lives On: (1) Hugo Castro, 28, wanted for questioning in October in San Jose, California, after his girlfriend was stabbed to death, helpfully presented himself at county jail. The sheriff's deputy listened — and then suggested Castro go find a San Jose police officer. Castro did, and the deputy was subsequently reassigned. (2) New Hampshire state police laid down spiked "stop sticks" in November to slow down a fleeing Joshua Buzza, 37, near Greenland, New Hampshire. Buzza was apprehended, but not before he managed to avoid the sticks while goading the drivers of three squad cars over them (flattening several tires). [SFGate.com (San Francisco), 10-29-2015] [Union Leader (Manchester), 11-2-2015] COPYRIGHT CHUCK SHEPPARD ARIES - Mar 21/Apr 20 Aries, things go well this week, but expect a few bumps along the way as well. Learn how to clear these hurdles and you will stay on track. TAURUS - Apr 21/May 21 Taurus, keep your eye on the prize, resisting the temptation to get swept up in distractions. The longer you can maintain your focus this week, the more likely you are to be successful. GEMINI - May 22/Jun 21 Luck puts you in the path of someone you have been anxious to meet, Gemini. Use this opportunity this week to ask all the questions you have been wanting to ask. CANCER - Jun 22/Jul 22 Persistence is your best ally this week, Cancer. When others give up early, you have the tenacity to continue. Don't be surprised if others notice your hard work. LEO - Jul 23/Aug 23 Other people appreciate your ability to put a positive spin on things, Leo. Use that talent to help two friends overcome their differences in the next week. VIRGO - Aug 24/Sept 22 Keep an open mind when someone comes to you with a suggestion, Virgo. Even though you are quick to dismiss it outright, give it a second thought. LIBRA - Sept 23/Oct 23 Libra, some big challenges are coming your way, but it's not anything you can't handle. However, you may need to bring in some reinforcements. Enlist some friends to help out. SCORPIO - Oct 24/Nov 22 Scorpio, after many weeks of putting in your best effort at work and at home, it very well may be time to take a break. Here's a chance to book a vacation before the holiday rush. SAGITTARIUS - Nov 23/Dec 21 Sagittarius, even though you are quite persuasive, you cannot always make miracles happen. If someone isn't moved by your call to action, don't take it personally. CAPRICORN - Dec 22/Jan 20 Capricorn, there's not much more you can pile onto your plate without it tipping over. This week lighten your load by asking family to help. They are more than willing. AQUARIUS - Jan 21/Feb 18 Make an effort to restore some order to your finances, Aquarius. It may be time to curtail your spending, but a close examination of your finances won't cause much panic. PISCES - Feb 19/Mar 20 Pisces, some mysterious news has piqued your curiosity, and now you may not be sure which direction to go for a few days. Amy Alkon Chuck Sheppard Skibo Rd - Fayetteville Lowe's parking lot behind Chick - fil - A Friday, December 4 6a-7p

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