Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/9650
Monday, April 26, 2010 – Daily News – 3B Young woman still struggles with her sexual orientation Dear Annie: Is it unusual for a 25-year-old to not know her sexual orientation? In her senior year in high school, our daughter told us she thought she was gay. She then had a relationship with another girl that didn’t turn out well. When she was a college sophomore, she had a long- term relationship with a guy who treated her beautifully. It was the happiest we had ever seen her. However, that rela- tionship broke up, too, because he wasn’t the right guy for her. (We agreed.) Since then, she has dated men who have treated her poorly and women with whom things haven’t ‘‘clicked.’’ She told me she is not opposed to dating men as long as they are decent guys. We will accept her for who- ever she is. But tell me, Annie, isn’t this kind of confusion unusual at this stage of the game? — Confused Parent Dear Confused: Not neces- sarily. There is often a lot of experimentation at this age, and it is also possible your daughter is simply bisexual and attracted equally to both sexes. Her bigger problem seems to be choosing inappropriate part- ners, which may contribute to her vacillation about whether she’s better off with men or women. We are glad you will accept her regardless, so please allow her to sort through this on her own, and help by encouraging her to find partners who will respect her. Dear Annie: I have always dreaded taking a bath or show- er. Baths always leave me chilled, no matter how warm it is. I dislike showers because I nearly drowned as a child and, as a result, cannot tolerate get- ting my head wet. It has gotten so bad that I go for weeks without washing. Friends have noticed and com- mented on my unpleasant body odor. I don’t want to offend them, but I cannot overcome my washing phobia. I’d rather be dirty. I am seeing both a psychiatrist and a counselor, but I’m ashamed to bring this up to them. — Need Help in the Midlands Dear Midlands: There are ways to shower without getting your hair wet, and chills are the reason there are bathrobes. Your problems go much deep- er. If your friends have noticed your lack of hygiene, your psy- chiatrist and counselor certain- ly have, as well. If you are writing to us, it means you are getting ready to open up on the subject. Please don’t be embar- rassed to discuss it with the very people who can help you most. And believe us, they’ve heard everything. Dear Annie: Your response to ‘‘Frustrated in Pa.’’ was not my favorite. He said she was more interested in sex after a Cluster headaches debilitating DEAR DR. GOTT: My 43-year-old son has clus- ter headaches that began about five years ago. The first series was twice daily at about the same time each day. The bout lasted between six and eight weeks, and then stopped. Two years later, they returned once daily. His doctor did an MRI that was normal and diag- nosed him with cluster headaches. He was put on heavy doses of steroids that weren’t success- ful. He recently began another series. They now occur once daily between 9 p.m. and 11:30 p.m. He went to a neu- rologist and tried several different Unfortunately for your son, his events occur more frequently than the norm, which is one or two annu- al cluster periods. Dr. Peter Gott medications that were unsuccessful. This time frame and duration fluctu- ates more, and he skipped two days twice. Pain med- ications don’t work. My son has done a lot of research on the Inter- net. However, so far the legal recommended pro- cedures do not work for him. Isn’t there anything to relieve the terrible pain he endures, as well as the anxiety he experiences prior to their occurrence? The pain he describes is like he would imagine having an ice pick stuck in his head in the exact same location. He also says he cannot breathe out of his nose during an attack, and his eyes water so that he cannot see. Any help or advice would be sincerely appreciated. DEAR READER: Your son’s presentation of cluster headaches is text- book. Events may last from weeks to months, followed by periods of remission, when they may stop completely. Remis- sion can be for a month or for several years. The duration of a single attack may be several minutes or, unfortunately, several hours. Attacks commonly occur at the same time each day. Patterns vary from person to person. Cluster headaches may occur without prior warn- ing. Symptoms include a stuffy or runny nose, rest- lessness, redness and swelling around the eye on the affected side of the face, and excessive tear- ing. Most people with the diagnosis avoid lying down during an attack, because the position appears to exacerbate pain. The cause of the cluster is unknown; howev- er, it is believed tied to an abnor- mality of the hypothalamus, the portion of the brain that controls many bodily functions to include the nervous and endocrine systems. Chemicals that carry impulses to the brain are thought to be involved as well. Abnormal mela- tonin and cortisol levels are common during events. Unfortunately, there is no cure for cluster headaches. Once diag- nosed, long-term medica- tion will likely be pre- scribed. This will likely be backed with short- term medication that may prevent an attack until the long-term drug kicks in. Treatment is directed toward decreasing pain, shortening the duration of events and prevention. Over-the-counter med- ications are ineffective. A physician, however, might prescribe sumatrip- tan, commonly used for migraines, zolmitriptan nasal spray, inhaled or IV dihydroergotamine, or oxygen inhaled through a mask. Surgery can be performed only once and can have serious draw- backs. High altitudes with reduced oxygen levels can be to blame. Avoid alco- hol, tobacco smoke, cleaning solvents, oil- based paints, gasoline, heavy fumes, foods such as smoked products and Shasta College Measure A oversight committee to meet As a result of the successful passage of Measure A in March 2002, a Citizens Oversight Committee for Bond Measure A was formed and announced in June 2002. The committee will meet at 5:30 p.m. Monday, May 3, at the Tehama Campus, 770 Diamond Ave., Room 7314 Sci- ence Lab, Red Bluff. The purpose of the committee is to inform the public at least annually in a written report concerning the expen- diture of the bond proceeds. In carrying out this purpose, the committee shall: • Actively review and report on the proper expenditure of taxpayers' money for school construction. • Advise the public as to whether the community col- lege district is in compliance with the requirements of paragraph (3) of subdivision (b) of Section 1 of Article XIIIA of the California Constitution, to ensure that bond revenues are expended only for the construction, recon- struction, rehabilitation, or replacement of school facili- ties, including furnishing and equipping of school facili- ties, or the acquisition or lease of real property for school facilities; and no funds are used for any teacher or admin- istrative salaries or other school operating expenses. The public is welcome to attend this meeting. some processed meats that contain nitrates, as well as medications such as nitroglycerine. Anxiety is common with cluster headaches. Your son might benefit from speaking with a ther- apist or by joining a sup- port group. He should ask his primary-care physi- cian or neurologist for a reference. To provide related information, I am sending you a copy of my Health Report “Headaches.” Other readers who would like a copy should send a self-addressed stamped No. 10 envelope and a $2 check or money order to Newsletter, P.O. Box 167, Wickliffe, OH 44092. Be sure to mention the title or print an order form off my website at www.AskDr- GottMD.com. Dr. Peter H. Gott is a retired physician and the author of several books, including “Live Longer, Live Better,” “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Diet” and “Dr. Gott’s No Flour, No Sugar Cookbook,” which are available at most bookstores or online. His website is www.AskDrGottMD.com. D NEWSAILY AUTO ROUTE RED BLUFF TEHAMACOUNTY DRIVERS WANTED Corning Area night out with the girls. Along with other advice, you gave the impression that something else might be going on. Assuming this woman is in her 40s, she is just like me. I, too, have a tendency to be more ‘‘vibrant’’ after being out with the girls. Certainly a few drinks loosens anyone up, but the time away from dishes, laundry, kids, homework, bills, etc., along with time to be myself, makes me feel younger and sexier than anything. to her honestly to see how he can help put her in that relaxed mood more often. — Glad My Hubby Understands Dear Glad: We are all Annie’s Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar in favor of a girls’ night out and understand how it can help relax an over- worked, stressed-out wife. That wasn’t his problem. It was that the only time they had sex was after such a night out, when the wife was completely drunk and her sexu- al appetite was voracious. Your situation sounds normal. Hers does not. Annie’s Mailbox is written by It is sometimes hard to be in the mood at the end of a long day. ‘‘Frustrated’’ is probably tired and stressed. To insinuate that she is doing more than decompressing offends me. Instead of blaming everything on menopause, maybe you should have suggested he talk Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. Must be 21 or older & bondable. GREAT PAY Call or apply in person Circulation Dept. Red Bluff Daily News (530)527-2151