Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/818403
DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman THEDUPLEX GlennMcCoy ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARAMY»Our25-year- old niece was born with severe hearing loss. She grew up in near-poverty, her father left when she was a toddler, and her grandfather molested her. She has overcome it all and has recently become an ASL associate profes- sor at a state university with a master's in psychology. Our niece deserves all the praise for her hard work, but could not have achieved her education without the help of my wife, who made it her mission to love and guide her every step of the way. I am so proud of them both. The problem is, this girl, pure of heart, is about to commit her life to a drug-addicted fiance, who has been in her life for four years. This guy showed up incoherent at her gradu- ation, has overdosed in the past and promises to kill himself if she leaves. She tried to break it off a few months ago, but her own mother told her to apologize and go back to him. (My guess is the mom sees stability from his family money.) At that time, the guy's father told my niece she was too good for his son. Aaagh! I am the product of al- coholic parents. It is pain- ful to see this dear girl so alone, but so far I have stayed on the sidelines. My question to you is, can I tell her this guy should sober up, or no wedding? She has always seen me as a dependable, loving influence in her life. —WorriedUncle DEAR UNCLE » You should not tell this adult, "This guy should sober up, or no wedding." It is not useful for you to commit to such a paternalistic statement when you have stayed on the sidelines. As a family member who cares about her, you should come out from the sidelines and pledge your support to her, not attempt to control her. As the survivor of so many li fe cha lleng es, she is vulnerable, certainly when it comes to her re- lationship with men. Her guy's threat to kill himself is extremely emotionally manipulative and classic abusive and controlling behavior. You and your wife should tell her very hon- estly that you are worried about her. Be gentle, kind and communicative. Offer her your support if she wants to leave the relationship. Don't pres- ent her with ultimatums. She needs to learn the important concept of "self-care," starting with the reality that she is wor- thy of healthy love. Even though she has an ad- vanced degree in psychol- ogy, she should pursue professional counseling on her own behalf. DEAR AMY » I was sur- prised when you took the side of "Hurting," the guy whose ex was falsely accusing him of abuse. So often, you reflexively take the woman's side on any issue. I agree with you on this one. — Male Reader DEAR MALE » I reject your premise, but I'll take the (backhanded) compli- ment. Thank you. Aunt and uncle worry about niece's abusive relationship You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson. com and follow her on Twitter @askingamy. Amy Dickinson Ask Amy Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Taurus(April20-May20) — Don't let the little things get to you. If someone tries to make you feel guilty, don't feel obliged to play along. Look at what you can accomplish. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — Personal improvements will enhance your love life. Share your feelings and engage in romantic interactions with someone special. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — It's in your best interest to put greater emphasis on personal change instead of trying to change someone else. A rela- tionship will suffer. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — A personal pick-me-up will do you good. Find something you enjoy doing and ask a good friend to join you. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — Take better care of your ap- pearance and how you present yourself to others. Looks and attitude can make a differ- ence when you are trying to get ahead. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — You'll enjoy the benefits that go along with being popular. Don't let it go to your head. Give back as much as, if not more than, what you receive from others. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — You'll have to think outside the box if you want to avoid an emotional scene. Be creative and initiate plans that will please everyone. Leaving some- one out will lead to trouble. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — Put more time, money and energy into improving your home environment and personal relationships. A little effort and attention will make a difference to the way your life unfolds. Romance is highlighted. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — Be careful about your emotions when dealing with partnerships. Whether an ar- rangement is business, financial or personal, you cannot let your feelings dictate what you do. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Personal gains should be your top priority. Whether it's a mental, physical or emotional change you want to make, this is a good day to start the process. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — Take better care of your health and physical well-being. A little exercise and a nutri- tious diet will help you be more productive. Trust your instincts when dealing with friends. Aries (March 21-April 19) — Have some fun. Going on a shopping spree or getting to- gether with friends will improve your day. A romantic gesture will turn out to be more enter- taining than expected. Horoscope By Eugenia Last TUESDAY, MAY 2 TUESDAY, MAY 2, 2017 REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM |YOURDAILYBREAK | 3 B