Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/709557
DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman THEDUPLEX GlennMcCoy ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARAMY»Iam55and my significant other is 56. We are both divorced and have children from our previous marriages. I have a son and a daugh- ter; she has a son and two daughters. They are all young adults. We've lived together for about three years. Her 23-year- old son lives with us. He is a great kid with a few anxiety issues. He spends time with his girl- friend at her house, and when he does not sleep at our house his mom will bring his lunch to work for him. She makes his lunch every day. I don't really mind this — I just want your opinion about whether this may keep him from being independent. She does everything for him. She cleans his room, does his laundry and picks up after him. We do not ask him to do chores or charge rent. I brought this up and she said she was raised to help family. I always helped with chores growing up. I don't mind helping him and want him to be successful. Should I ignore this and let mom do what moms do, or should I make it an issue? Would I be asking too much to give him a timeline to when he starts helping with a little room and board or some other responsibilities? He does pay his own bills. He also works close to 40 hours a week. I work full time and pay all utilities and taxes. She works part time and pays for food, and she cooks and cleans. She has girlfriends who comment to her, "Oh, that's so nice." Should I feel the same? —Bothered DEAR BOTHERED » Read- ing between the lines, my sense is that your partner is babying her son in a way that she did not baby her daughters (you don't mention her treatment of her daughters, so I'm making an assumption). Basically, I'm picturing an "Everybody Loves Ray- mond" situation where mom expresses her love through caretaking. My own view is that this tends to retard some very important life skills that all adults should pos- sess: the ability to keep his space clean, take care of his own clothing and cook a meal or two. However, the eternal stepparents' burden is to accept the way other peo- ple parent their children, while trying to exert some influence when your own instincts are different. Questions to answer in your household are: Does this young man have a life plan? Does he have a goal to live on his own? You a re a full pa rtn er in this household, and you have a right to ask this adult to contribute. Ideally, you three would sit down together and ask this son about his larger goals. I think ask- ing for a modest rent is not only reasonable, but will help him to budget his income, spending and saving. If mom needs to wait on him while he lives at home, and if she continues to enjoy it, and if he is respectful and responsible, then you should let that part go. Mom makes her young adult son's life extra-lunchable You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribpub.com and follow her on Twitter @askingamy. Amy Dickinson Ask Amy Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Leo(July23-Aug.22)— Offer your expertise, but give others a chance to make their own decisions. Taking charge of your personal life will encourage a healthy and fruitful lifestyle. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — You need to keep secrets, or you may find that you will be blamed for the outcome of a sensitive situation. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — Satisfaction will be the name of the game. Put your ideas out there and show your interest in bringing about community or environmental improvements. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — Stay on top of health issues and situations that might jeop- ardize your position or reputa- tion. Strategic planning will be necessary. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — Don't make promises or commit to something that you will have second thoughts about. Put more into personal enhancement and home com- fort. Say no to anyone being overly pushy. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — If you reflect on what you have done and the people you have met along the way, you will come to realize what's impor- tant to you now and see the best way to move forward. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Your insight will help you as- sist those in need. Don't neglect an important partnership with someone who has been there for you in the past. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — Don't expect everyone to share your opinion. If you are willing to listen and learn, you will find common ground and a prosperous way to move forward. Aries (March 21-April 19) — Love conquers all. Your change- able attitude and experimental nature will attract all sorts of responses. Offer love and com- passion, and you will receive the same in return. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — You should spend a little extra on something that makes you happy and is conducive to bring- ing about positive change. Don't let a stubborn attitude deter you from getting the help and sup- port you need to forge ahead. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — Stick close to home and enjoy building a strong founda- tion with the people who love you the most. Don't let temp- tation take you from a safe environment. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — Renovating your domestic space, hosting an event at your place or exploring your creative ideas with an inspirational part- ner will bring good results. Horoscope By Eugenia Last SATURDAY, JULY 30 | YOURDAILYBREAK | REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM SATURDAY, JULY 30, 2016 8 B