Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/66459
4B Daily News – Saturday, May 19, 2012 Husband e-mailing another woman FEATURES A few months ago, my husband mentioned that he'd responded to an email from a girl he used to know. I didn't think much about it, but then I saw him composing an email, and every time I walked near him, he shielded it Dear Annie: understand why he would keep emailing when he knows how much it upsets me — unless he has feelings for her. I want to trust him again, but Annie's Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar from me. He started spending more time on the computer, and I got curious. Finally, I checked his account and saw that he and this girl had been corresponding every day. There was nothing sexual, but there was a lot of flirting, and he encouraged her to keep writ- ing. I confronted my husband, and he insisted it was all innocent, that they were only friends and he had no intention of taking things any further. We talked about it, and I let him know how hurt I was. I said this is how affairs start. He promised there would be no more emails. I told him that would go a long way toward help- ing me to forgive and forget. I thought he understood, but tonight he showed me an email he was sending her. I guess he thinks that makes it OK. But, Annie, he promised he would stop commu- nicating with her, and I expect him to keep his word. I cannot how can I when he keeps doing this? I have loved him for 40 years and don't want to lose him, but I don't think I can live with this sit- uation. — Desperate Housewife Dear Desperate: Your hus- band doesn't understand that this is a betrayal of your marriage. And although he may not have any real feelings for this woman, he sounds mildly infatuated, and the correspondence boosts his ego. He enjoys the flirting and wants it to continue. First, try revving up the action at home so your husband appreciates what he has. He needs more flirtatious attention from you. Then tell him the emailing needs to stop, because the next step is marriage counseling. Dear Annie: Some time ago, I attended an event at a friend's church. There was an empty seat at our table, so a solo man was seated with us. He seemed agree- able until he was finished eating. Then he took a flosser out of his pocket and proceeded to clean his teeth at the table. I almost threw up. often inappropriate in public and either don't realize or don't care that others find it unappetizing. It would have been fine to say with a slight grimace, ''Would you mind flossing in the restroom? It's such a private activity, and some of us have sensitive stomachs.'' course, there is no guarantee that he would listen. Dear Annie: The letter from Of ''Lake Effect Wife'' hit home. In my 35 years of marriage, I have always done the household chores, shopping and cooking. There were several years when I also was the only one bringing in an income. I have never been able to get my husband to do anything. When I ask why, he says, ''It's not important to me, but if it is to you, then you do it.'' I cannot describe how this has crushed me. I couldn't figure out how I chose a man who cared so little for me that he wouldn't lift a finger to help. I always thought marriage was a partnership, but I've been going it alone for a long time. If I knew then what I know now — I'd Be Single Annie's Mailbox is written by Would it have been acceptable for me to ask him to please go to the restroom to perform that ritu- al? If not, how else might I have handled it? — Turned Stomach Dear Stomach: People are Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. Willie Nelson picks his 'Heroes' AUSTIN, Texas (AP) — When Snoop Dogg passed through Willie Nelson's neck of the woods during South By Southwest in March, he took some time to pay tribute to his unlikely friend. He regaled reporters with mostly NSFW sto- ries about time the pair spent together in Ams- terdam, sharing their mutual love of music, marijuana and fried chicken. The always lighthearted Snoop also got serious when talking about his friendship with Nelson and the 79-year- old singer's unique role as a musical ambas- sador. ''When I first met him you would think he was a hip-hop artist because he showed love to me as if I was in his world and I never made country music or none of that, but he under- stood who I was,'' Snoop said. ''And it drove me to make coun- try music. I made a cou- ple of country records and was a part of his album and went to the Country Music Awards and worked with Brad Paisley, went to Johnny Cash's house. I was get- ting heavy into it and finding country music is a form of hip-hop music. It's the same thing. We're the same people. Don't let the rhythm fool you. It's the same game.'' The feeling is mutual, which is why Nelson included Snoop on his newest album, ''Heroes,'' a collection of songs sung with Nel- son's musical heroes that came out this month. The 40-year-old rapper is the only musi- cian on the album not connected to country music in some way. ''I just like the guy personally and his music is great,'' Nelson said. ''I'm not a big rapper- type fan, but I know he's great because he's already a legend and he's not that old, and there's a lot of people out there who are huge Snoop fans. He and I have a lot in common because we both smoke a little dope together now and then. Mainly we like to get together and play a little music and hang out any chance we get.'' Billy Joe Shaver and Sheryl Crow. Nelson and Snoop Dogg are joined by Kris Kristofferson and Jamey Johnson on ''Roll Me Up,'' one of three songs Nelson wrote or co-wrote. And Nelson and Haggard recast ''A Horse Called Music.'' He also covers songs by Tom Waits, Coldplay and Pearl Jam. That list also includes Others who appear with Nelson on the 14- track album include Ray Price, Merle Haggard, Nelson's son, Lukas, who appears on more than half the songs on the Buddy Cannon-pro- duced album. The two have recorded together before, but never so extensively. ''It's kind of the first time it happened with us,'' Lukas Nelson said. ''It was cool. It was exciting for me, at least. This was nice to be a part of.'' $99 Clock Repair 20910 Pebblestone Dr. Red Bluff Jim Paul Electrical clocks Call for appt. Mechanical, Battery and Member NAWCC Landscape/Fence & Landscape Service Steve's Tractor • Fence Building • Landscaping • Trenching • Rototilling • Disking • Mowing • Ridging • Post Hole Digging • Blade Work • Sprinkler Installation • Concrete Work Cont. Lic. #703511 Steve Dyke 385-1783 530-736-7079 Grandpa's Clocks Your Clock Repair Shop Print Runs Every Tuesday - Thursday- Saturday On-Line Print and www.redbluffdailynews.com in the On-Line runs 7 days a week, 24 hours a day at Tehama Country Real Estate section No early cancellation, non-refundable Construction o n • Plumbing • Drywall Repairs • Fences • Decks • Concrete • Garages House Remodel / Specialist Rental Turnovers / Repairs Bathroom Remodels / Tile Painting • Electrical Quality at a reasonable price FREE ESTIMATES 530 949-6162 Advertisement CA LIC#914460 527-2151 For more information If this was your Service Directory ad customers would be reading it right now!! Call us at Dump Service Small Tractor & Dump Service • All phases of construction • Gravel delivery (2-4 yards) R & R Northern California Contractor Phone (530) 529-1041 (530) 227-9498 Lic.# 478739 CA# 282782 CB# 55J55 Lawn Care Commercial & Residential Full Service Lawn Maintenance • Mowing • Spring Clean-ups • Weedeating • Lawn Aerations • Edging FREE CONSULTATION Serving Greater Tehama County since 1994 Contractor When you want it done right ... HIRE A LICENSED CONTRACTOR! Complete directory of Tehama County contractors online, listed by specialty on 2011 Contractors Guide under "Special Sections" www.RedBluffDailyNews.com Click on Advertisement 527-2151 For more information If this was your Service Directory ad customers would be reading it right now!! Call us at Identifying rosacea triggers helps lessen its impact DEAR DOCTOR K: I read your column on adult acne with great interest. For years, I thought I had adult acne, but when I finally saw a doctor, she diag- nosed me with rosacea. I'd like to learn more about this condition. DEAR READ- ER: Rosacea is a long-lasting skin condition that causes inflammation and redness of the face. Remember the comic W.C. Fields — and what his nose looked like? He had rosacea. Rosacea tends to begin in adults over the age of 30, although it can affect younger adults and kids. Rosacea is sometimes confused with acne, but acne usually starts in childhood and affects more of the skin of the face than rosacea does. Rosacea also has different causes than acne. Rosacea usually affects Fortunately, once rosacea is correctly diag- nosed, it is very treatable. Depend- ing on your symp- toms, your doctor may prescribe: — ANTIBI- Dr. K by Anthony L. Komaroff, M.D. by mouth, are also an option. OTICS. Metron- idazole cream or gel (MetroCream, MetroGel) is the most frequently prescribed thera- py. Prescription antibiotics, taken fair-skinned people. It is progressive. Most often it affects the cheeks and nose. It starts with redness that looks like sunburn or blush. At first, the redness is intermittent. Gradually, it becomes more notice- able and doesn't go away. It spreads to other areas of the face. Over time, small, solid — AZELAIC ACID (Finacea). This drug, which you apply to your skin, is used for the inflammatory pimples of mild to moderate rosacea. — BETA-BLOCKERS AND ALPHA ANTAGO- NISTS. These medica- tions may reduce flushing through their effect on blood vessels. They are not approved by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) to treat rosacea, but many doctors prescribe them anyway. — ESTROGEN. This female hormone is used when rosacea is aggravat- ed by the hot flashes of menopause. red bumps or pus-filled "pimples" appear on the face. (This explains why rosacea is often mistaken for adult acne.) Visible blood vessels appear on the surface of the skin. Doctors are not sure what causes rosacea, but one theory is supported by scientific studies. Certain bacteria that live on the skin seem to trigger an unusual immune response in some people. Immune system cells release chem- icals to help attack the bacteria. Unfortunately, the chemical attack also causes collateral damage that causes the skin to red- den and get bumpy. Eventually, thin red lines appear on the face, especially on the cheeks. Left untreated, rosacea can create small, knobby bumps on the nose, as it did with W.C. Fields. Blinds Need Blinds? C A L L P A U L Blinds & Draperies www.nsbd.biz Lic.#906022 527-0842 North State Paul Stubbs Landscaping CANNADAY'S LAWN CARE HONEST & RELIABLE DAVID CANNADY OWNER LAWN MAINTENANCE HEDGING & WEED EATING TREE TRIMMING & REMOVAL LANDSCAPING (530) 736-6652 — SURGICAL PRO- CEDURES. Surgical shaving or scraping can also be used to remove excess nose tissue. You can't prevent rosacea, but you can con- trol symptoms, which are often triggered by things that make your face flush. Once you identify your particular triggers, you can modify or avoid them. Common triggers include hot drinks, alcohol, spicy foods, stress, sunlight and extreme heat or cold. Also, use sunscreens and sun blockers regularly and liberally to protect your face. MENT. This is used to get rid of dilated blood ves- sels or to remove excess nose tissue. Dr. Komaroff is a physician and professor at Harvard Medical School. To send questions, go to AskDoctorK.com, or write: Ask Doctor K, 10 Shattuck St., Second Floor, Boston, MA 02115. — LASER TREAT- Residential • Commerical PATIOS • DECKS Construction Remodel, Construction Burrows FREE ESTIMATES & REFRENCES Lic#824770 Water and Dryrot Damage Specialist, New Construction Foundation to Finish New Additions, Siding Repair and Replacement, Ph: (530) 515-9779 Landscaping Torres Landscaping Mowing, Pruning, Weeding, Yearly Yard Maintenance Blowing, Cleaning, Trimming Monthly or One time available All around LAWN Maintenance Free Estimates Cell: 530-526-3752 Home: 520-529-5474 Ramon Torres Lic.# 10034 Storage Tractor Service Tractor Dan "Have Tractor-Will Travel" Mow (Rotary or Flail) 25% off with price matching 528-1456 BAKER ROAD STORAGE all units Till - Disk - Rip - Harrow Load - Light Hauling Gannon Box - Float Dan Marshall Owner/ Operator Insured Tehama County Resident since 1958 (530) 527-1437 n A o l l i t e c n u s t s C r