Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/641091
FEBRUARY 17-23, 2016 UCW 23 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM ADVICE GODDESS 50 Shades of Wait I'm a very successful guy in my 30s. I had a lot of casual sex in my 20s, but I got sick of the disconnection and emotional fallout. I'm looking for a relationship, and I've started waiting to sleep with women (for at least a month). I tell them this, but the waiting thing seems to make them want me more and push to have sex. What I don't get is why some get so angry at me. — Slow Train Women are used to men wanting sex right away — or sooner, if possible. Your being the one with your legs crossed? Well, it's like offering a dog a strip of bacon and having him look up and say, "Aww… thanks, doll, but I'm good." Now if these women getting angry with you were just lusty, there's an app for that — one that allows a moderately attractive woman to swipe a sex partner over faster than Domino's can get there with a pizza. The problem here is female sexual psychology. We all want to be wanted, but research by clinical psychologist Marta Meana finds that women, especially, seem to have an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. This makes evolutionary sense, in light of women's need for reliable signs that a guy would stick around after sex to "provide." A man having an uncontrollable longing for a particular woman is pretty great insurance — right up there with leg-shackling him to the cave wall. Not surprisingly, according to research by evolutionary psychologist Patricia Hawley, if there's catnip for women, it's those "bodice ripper" novels. They feature intense male desire for a woman, but not of just any male — a "powerful, resource- holding" one, like the playboy prince or titan of industry. This alpha god cannot be tamed, until … whoops … up pops our heroine, the apparently ordinary maiden. The hunky royal or CEO is so taken with her unique (and otherwise overlooked) beauty and spirit that he can't help but grab her and "ravish" her. Of course, in real life, we call this felony rape. In romance novels, when the guy is uber-rich and cruelly handsome, it's the start of a beautiful relationship. So, women's inability to defeat the time lock on your zipper is telling them something — no, not "Wow…he thinks I'm really worth getting to know," but "Wow…he thinks I'm uggo" and "That two-week sabbatical from Booty Barre has really caught up with me." It may help a little to reassure them that you find them wildly attractive — like by "confessing" that you have to take three cold showers and stare at pictures of steamed vegetables before every date. For you, this is the only possible way to keep from giving them one of those man-scam long hugs that turns into sex…uh, that is, three weeks and four days later. Copyright Amy Alkon WEEKLY HOROSCOPES NEWS OF THE WEIRD by CHUCK SHEPPARD Even though concealed-carry gun permit-holders in Texas can now "open carry," pistol-packing women concerned with fashion are not limited to traditional firearms in ordinary cowboy holsters. An online company, The Well Armed Woman, offers such carry options as stylish leggings, lace waistbands and an array of underarm and bra holsters (even an in-cup model, the "Marilyn") in leopard-print and pastel colors. However, a woman's body shape and size may be more important shopping considerations, according to the company's founder. "A 32A bust could not conceal a Glock 19 very well — nor would a 42DD-or-larger (front) allow for effective cross-draw carry." [Star-Telegram (Fort Worth), 12-22-2016] [NPR, 1-28-2016] Democracy Blues In January, Robert Battle took the oath of office for his second term as a city councilman in East Chicago, Indiana — administered at the county lockup, where he is being held without bail, charged with a cold- blooded murder during a drug deal. The crime made news in October (i.e., before election day), yet Battle still won his race. According to law, he cannot be forced out of office unless he is convicted or admits the crimes, and he had the right to vote for himself in the election (except that he failed to request an absentee ballot). [Chicago Tribune, 1-25-2016] Canonical Marijuana (1) The Albany, New York, company Vireo Health told reporters it would soon offer the world's first certified Kosher marijuana, announcing that the Orthodox Union of New York had authenticated it as having met Jewish dietary laws (e.g., grown with insect-free plants). (Other Kosher-validating officials complained that the approval should apply only to marijuana that is eaten, not smoked.) (2) Two habit-wearing nuns were scheduled to ask the Merced (California) City Council in January to decline its prerogative under state law to ban dispensing or cultivating medical marijuana. The nuns' order makes and sells salves and tonics for pain management, using a strain of cannabis containing only a trace of psychoactive material. [Haaretz (Tel Aviv), 1-7-2016] [San Francisco Chronicle, 1-4-2016] Bright Ideas Since the (naturally insulated) uterus can be a lonely space, Institut Marques of Barcelona, Spain, recently demonstrated a tampon-like "speaker" to carry soothing, specially selected, 54-decibel ("hushed tone") rhythms that supposedly improve fetal growth. In the Babypod's first "concert," the singer Soraya performs Christmas carols. (However, documented evidence for such a device was limited to success of in-vitro fertilization when music was wafted through during the first 48 hours of sperm-egg union.) [New York Times Live, 1-1-2016] 2015 COPYRIGHT CHUCK SHEPPARD ARIES - Mar 21/Apr 20 Your sense of time management and practicality come to the forefront this week, Aries. You want to get down to business, and your no-nonsense attitude will shine through. TAURUS - Apr 21/May 21 Taurus, this is a great week to just kick back and be yourself without feeling the crunch of deadlines or responsibilities. You'll get a few free moments to do whatever you like. GEMINI - May 22/Jun 21 Something you have always wanted to do may become possible this week. Maybe it's something from your bucket list. Bring a friend to join in the fun. CANCER - Jun 22/Jul 22 How far you come this week depends on your attitude, Cancer. If you keep an open mind, you will find success. Keep a positive attitude and reap the rewards. LEO - Jul 23/Aug 23 Leo, you will have the opportunity to work on a personal problem that has gotten the best of you before. Work through all of the angles before you put a plan in motion. VIRGO - Aug 24/Sept 22 You may find yourself in the position of middle man this week, Virgo. Others come to you with their concerns, and you put their minds at ease. LIBRA - Sept 23/Oct 23 Libra, everything seems like it will be rather ordinary this week. That's a good thing, as you can use a few laid-back days with not too much on your schedule. SCORPIO - Oct 24/Nov 22 Scorpio, shopping is on your mind but you may have to put that idea off for a little while longer. More pressing purchases for the home or business take priority. SAGITTARIUS - Nov 23/Dec 21 Sagittarius, your finances are a bit difficult to decode at the time being, and that can lead to trouble. Better to bring in someone who knows what he or she is doing to help you work it out. CAPRICORN - Dec 22/Jan 20 Capricorn, if you're looking to fill the void in your calendar, sign up for a class that will challenge your creative or mental abilities. Try an arts or dance center as a start. AQUARIUS - Jan 21/Feb 18 Aquarius, if you find that you are craving some adventurous activities, get started. But work under the tutelage of an experienced guide to learn the ropes. PISCES - Feb 19/Mar 20 You may find yourself teaching a co-worker some of the intricacies of the job. Don't feel threatened; it may help lighten your own workload. Amy Alkon Log on. Plan a getaway. Let yourself unplug. a we b s ite to ta ke yo u to pl a c e s wh e re th e re a re n o we b s ite s . NC Tourism_Ad Layouts_4C_NEWS_9.88x10_FINAL.indd 3 6/4/14 4:45 PM