Up & Coming Weekly

DECEMBER 2-8, 2009 UCW 31 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM ADVICE GODDESS Eat, Pry and Love I have a suggestion for the woman wondering whether her boyfriend really has money or is carrying a million in debt: run a credit check. A friend's daughter almost married a wonderful guy who turned out to be a gambling addict. After that, my friend started running credit checks on every guy his daughter started getting serious with (she was over 30 at the time). Some of us aren't the greatest choosers, and talented liars pick partners who can't or won't confront them, so a little sleuthing isn't unreasonable. — Been Bitten There are some good liars out there, but even the craftiest can't hide everything all the time. Something will eventually slip through the cracks. Sometimes, a femur. Remember, Scott Peterson didn't have a gambling problem. And sure, a credit check would probably pick up on a man who does. Unfortunately, it's illegal to do one without permission. And since the credit check, and who ordered it, will likely show up on the person's credit report, what you're suggesting is like throwing a brick through somebody's window, but taping your business card to it first. Your friend apparently fails to see the irony in taking the devious approach to helping his daughter avoid the devious. He probably tells himself he's just protecting his little girl -- his little girl of 30-plus, who he never managed to teach to vet men for herself. He could really mess things up for her, should some nice guy find out Daddy's been feeling up his finances. Being in a relationship isn't license to gallop through a person's privacy. "Make yourself at home" means "my fridge is your fridge," not that you should feel free to scoop up hair and nail clippings and bribe somebody at the crime lab to run them through "Trace." If you're continually ending up in the arms of con boys, you don't hire Nancy Drew; you work to change that. Don't assume you're a poor chooser. You might be an excellent chooser — excellent at choosing the best partner to replay whatever number Mommy Dearest did on you. But, chances are, you're desperate for love — making you desperate to ignore pesky inconsistencies that scream "That isn't his yacht, he doesn't work for the CIA," and in worst cases, "Get out before somebody has to get you out — by digging between the rose bushes for your remains." Of course, most bad guys you'll meet are serial jerks, not serial killers. To avoid them, lose any romantic notions about "love at first sight," which is really idiocy at first sight: deciding somebody's "the one" because they have a cute cowlick and broad shoulders and you haven't had sex for six months. This doesn't mean looking for love should give way to looking for evidence, just that you should reserve judgment until you've had ample time to see somebody's true character, which comes out in those little moments when they think nobody's looking. To catch particularly clever cons, Dr. Barbara Oakley, author of "Evil Genes," advises talking to "the little people" — a receptionist, the janitor, someone who knows them in passing: people they aren't trying to win over. You should also meet the medium-sized people — their friends, family, and co-workers -- and see if you all seem to be talking about the same guy. But, most important, you have to be comfortable enough being alone to want to know who somebody really is — before they steal your heart, then head over to the pawn shop to see what they can get for your iPod and wide- screen TV. Amy Alkon WEEKLY HOROSCOPE THIS WEEK in the STARS www.Astrology-101.com ARIES - March 21 thru April 20 Adaptable Mercury in your Career sector could bring favorable developments. Key is to give serious consideration to new ideas and new methods in changing times. TAURUS - April 21 thru May 21 Opportunities to further your goals could come from others in far away places. New circumstances in changing times may open new doors. GEMINI - May 22 thru June 21. Mercury, planet of ideas brings new thinking. Partnerships and other close relationships may fi nd new channels for fi nancial improvements now. CANCER - June 22 thru July 23 Emphasis may be in the area of ties with others, particularly your meaningful other or business partner. Consistent efforts will bring rewards. LEO - July 24 thru August 23 Close business or personal ties may soon be playing a more important role in your life. Adaptability is an excellent quality to have at this time. VIRGO - August 24 thru Sept 23 Romance and social matters take top billing as Mercury, planet of ideas moves into "Fun" sector. What you conceive and believe you can achieve. LIBRA - Sept 24 thru Oct 23 Favorable developments in Domestic issues are likely as Mercury moves thru your home sector. New circumstances may soon bear fruit. SCORPIO - Oct 24 thru Nov 22 If at fi rst you didn't succeed, try again! You stand to gain by renewing old contacts. Diamonds may be under your feet if you dig deeper. SAGITTARIUS - Nov 23 thru Dec 21 Mercury, planet of ideas, moves thru your Income sector. Your need for freedom is emphasized. New times open new doors. CAPRICORN - Dec 22 thru Jan 20 . Personal plans may be furthered as your sign plays host to innovative Mercury. A craft or talent could become a profi table sideline. AQUARIUS - Jan 21 thru Feb 19 Give yourself a break! Concentrate on getting rid of those concerns that are tension building. Problems are best solved when you "sleep on them." PISCES - Feb 20 thru March 20 Wish fulfi llment also depends on putting yourself in the proper places where help and answers fl ourish. Your hopes may soon come to pass. NEWS OF THE WEIRD by CHUCK SHEPPARD The fi rst line of "defense" at the 400 Iraqi police checkpoints in Baghdad are small wands with antennas that supposedly detect explosives, but which U.S. offi cials say are about as useful as Ouija boards. The Iraqi offi cial in charge, Maj. Gen. Jehad al-Jabiri, is so enamored of the devices, according to a November New York Times dispatch, that when American experts repeatedly showed the rods' failures in test after test, he blamed the results on testers' lack of "training." The Iraqi government has purchased 1,500 of the ADE 651s from its manufacturer, ATSC Ltd. of the UK, at prices ranging from $16,000 to $60,000 each. The suicide bombers who killed 155 in downtown Baghdad on Oct. 25 passed two tons of explosives through at least one ADE-651-equipped checkpoint. [New York Times, 11-4-09] Cultural Diversity Many mixed-race ("coloured") teenage boys in Cape Town, South Africa, secure their ethnic identity by having several upper front teeth removed, according to an October dispatch in London's Daily Telegraph. A University of Cape Town professor said fashion and peer pressure were primary motives for creating the tooth-gap, and not the popular myth among outsiders that coloureds do it to facilitate oral sex. (The ritual includes fi tting dentures for the gap just in case, to give the boys fl exibility.) [Daily Telegraph, 10-7-09] What a Difference a Day Makes: Charles Wesley Mumbere, 56, was a longtime nurse's aide at a nursing home in Harrisburg, Pa., until July, when the Ugandan government recognized the separatist Rwenzururu territory founded in 1962 by Mumbere's late father. In October, Mumbere returned to his native country as king of the region's 300,000 subjects. [The Guardian (London), 10- 20-09] Jigme Wangchuk, 11, was a student at St. Peter's School in Boston when he was enthroned in November by a Buddhist sect in India's Darjeeling district as its high priest, covering territory extending to neighboring Nepal and Bhutan. He will live in seclusion in his monastery, except for contact with Facebook friends he made while in Boston. [Daily Telegraph (London), 11- 4-09] An unprecedented toilet-building spree has taken hold in India over the last two years, spurred by a government campaign embraced by young women: "No Toilet, No Bride" (i.e., no marriage unless the male's dowry includes indoor plumbing). About 665 million people in India lack access to toilets, according to an October Washington Post dispatch. [Washington Post, 10-12-09]

• Cover