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Saturday, September 3, 2011 – Daily News 5A FEATURES Hubby's hermetic holiday hurtful Dear Annie: ''Mike'' and I are in our 60s and have been married seven years. We each have children from previous marriages, all of whom are grown and out of the house. Recently, I noticed that Mike friended his ex-wife on Facebook. They correspond occasionally and play an online game together. I always suspected that she still had a thing for him, even though she was the one who initiated the divorce. Mike was divorced for eight years when we met, but I have always felt that his children resent me. Today, I saw a receipt for tickets to an out-of- state amusement park where he is planning to go with his daughter and grandchildren. I noticed a receipt for another person (a senior). It's not for me because I have to work. I believe this ticket is for his ex-wife. I asked if she would be there, and he said he ''didn't think so.'' He claims he can't stand her. I am considering divorce because the trust is gone. I get along with my ex, but would not jeopardize my mar- riage by going on an out-of-town trip with him. Am I jumping the gun? Is this just a family outing? — Not Worlds of Fun for Me Dear Fun: You are jumping the Annie's Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar gun. You don't know that the ex-wife is going or who invit- ed her. And if she's there, it doesn't mean he is cheating. Get the details from your hus- band, and explain your con- cerns. If his responses aren't satisfactory, tell him your marriage is at risk and ask him to come with you for counsel- ing. Dear Annie: Recently, my 49-year-old sister committed suicide. She lived with my partner and me for the last 18 months. I find it harder each day to understand why this happened. I am upset, angry, troubled and confused. My sister was bipolar and on med- ication. She had attempted suicide before, but tried to fight the self- destructive thoughts, admitting herself to the hospital when necessary. We assured her that she could live with us forever and that we loved having her with us. She was so good with our dogs, and they seemed to be a comfort to her. We never had a clue what she was planning, and she had it all planned out two weeks ahead. She bought a gun, cleaned her room, did her wash and left a letter explaining that this was the only way to ease her pain. She waited until after midnight and went to a nearby nature preserve. She was found within two hours. My sister often said that she hated her life and had no friends and thought when she died there would be few people at her funeral. But the funeral home was so crowded that there wasn't even standing room. Do people who commit suicide know how much pain they leave behind and how much we struggle to accept it? I will always wonder what I could have done differently. Please help. — Miss My Sister Dear Sister: We can tell how anguished you are, and our hearts are breaking for you. Your sister was mentally ill and obviously in great pain. She could see no end to it and believed suicide was her only way out. You sound like a loving sister, and you created a warm and supportive home. Now you could use some support, too. Please try Survivors of Suicide at sur- vivorsofsuicide.com. Dear Annie: I read the letter from ''Sherman Oaks, Calif.,'' who dropped her friend ''Jill'' because she wouldn't stop gossiping. She should have told Jill, ''I have told you I don't like the way you gos- sip about your friends and I don't want to hear it. Please change the subject.'' Repeat as needed. She might change her behavior if she is interrupted at the moment of offense every single time. — St. Maarten Holiday weekend info from National Forest WILLOWS – The employees of the Mendoci- no National Forest want to remind visitors to have a safe Labor Day holiday, especially while recreating in the forest. For those coming to the Mendocino, the Stonyford Work Center, 5171 Stony- ford-Elk Creek Road in Stonyford, will be open from 8 a.m. to noon and 12:30 to 4:30 p.m. on Sat- urday, Sept. 3. All offices will be closed Monday in observance of the holiday. The Forest is entering into fire restrictions this Saturday. The restrictions are going into place more than a month later than last year. Visitors are asked to be aware and be careful with fire in the National Forest, including camp- fires, gas stoves and lanterns. While the weather is still warm at lower eleva- tions, visitors should be prepared for changing con- ditions and cooler night- time temperatures in the mountains. Bring layered clothing and plenty of food and water on your outdoor adventure. Tell someone where you are planning on going, which routes you plan on taking and when you plan on being back. What can my son expect from PKD? DEAR DR. GOTT: My son was recently diag- nosed with poly- cystic kidney dis- ease (PKD) at age 27. He was told he's had it all his life since it's hereditary. He is upset that his new- born son has a 50 percent chance of having it, too. history to develop the disorder. Dr. Peter Gott He has been going through a thorough work- up to determine a base line, but before he sees his nephrologist again, I thought he might benefit from having independent information to help him. Currently he has "We want everyone to have a safe and memorable Labor Day weekend, espe- cially those joining us on the Forest," said Acting Forest Supervisor Lee Johnson. For more information, contact the Mendocino National Forest Stonyford Work Center at 530-963- 1300 or visit www.fs.usda.gov /mendo- cino. Emergency preparedness panel discussion An Emergency Preparedness Panel Discussion inspired by this year's community book in com- mon, Dave Eggers' "Zeitoun," will take place September 19 from 6:30-8 p.m. in the Chico City Council Chambers. "Zeitoun" documents the impact of Hurricane Katrina on an American family living in New Orleans — before, during and fol- lowing the disaster. Among its many themes, the book asks us to consider what it means to be part of a community and what our responsibilities to one another are in times of crisis. "The Emergency Preparedness Panel is designed to help us con- sider how prepared we would be — individually and collectively — if a disaster struck Chico," noted Thia Wolf, First-year Program Director at Chico State and coordi- nator of book in common events. Speakers include Alivia Strawn, Enloe Medical Center Director of Environment of Care; Marvin Pratt, CSU, Chico Envi- ronmental Health & Safety Direc- tor; James Beery, City of Chico Fire Department Fire Chief; and Tim Truby, Chico Police Depart- ment Crime Prevention Specialist. "This discussion will shed light on how to protect yourself, your loved ones, and your neighbors during a crisis," said Wolf. The panel will touch on various issues regarding emergency pre- paredness, including: • What would likely happen in the first two to three days follow- ing a large-scale emergency in Chico? • What do individuals, families James W. 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Stu- dents and faculty from Butte Col- lege and CSU, Chico will read excerpts from the book and some typical New Orleans' type jazz will help set the scene. Mayor Ann Schwab will read a proclamation from the City of Chico. Both events are free and open to the public. For more information contact Wolf at 898-6759. Look for more book in common events online at www.csuchico.edu/bic. RED BLUFF COLLISION ✪Windshield Replacement $ starting at 200 ✪ Auto Detailing $ 50 off your 1st visit FREE Estimates 530.527.6160 915 Madison St., Red Bluff enlarged kidneys with many cysts on both and a liver cyst. He has had a blood pressure problem since college and has been tired most of his life. A heart murmur was detect- ed when he was young, so he takes antibiotics before dental work. I've heard there are things you can do to help slow down the progres- sion of this disease. I know it is incurable at pre- sent, but I understand that a cure may be possible within his lifetime. I have read that controlling blood pressure is at the top of the list, as well as consuming adequate water and restricting salt and protein in his diet. The long-term prob- lems are difficult for me to talk about, so I hope you will mention them as well has any other possible symptoms and treatments. DEAR READER: Polycystic kidney disease causes the kidneys to develop clusters of cysts (fluid-filled sacs). The cysts are non-cancerous and can also affect other organs, such as the liver. It varies in severity. The most common sign is high blood pressure. Other signs include kid- ney stones, kidney failure, headache, frequent urina- tion, urinary tract or kid- ney infections, back or side pain, an increase in abdomen size and blood in the urine. Polycystic kidney dis- ease is most commonly caused by genetic defects passed from parent to child. Rarely, a sponta- neous genetic mutation can occur, causing an indi- vidual without a family 2 eggs, hash browns or home fries & biscuit with gravy $599 Served 6:30am-2pm 7 days a week No substitutions ORDERS TO GO 7875 HWY 99E LOS MOLINOS, CA 384-1265 There are two types of PKD. The first, autoso- mal dominant polycystic kidney disease (ADPKD), accounts for approximately 90 percent of all cases. Only one parent needs to be affected to pass it down. Each child born to that individ- ual has a 50 percent chance of inheriting the disease. Symptoms typi- cally begin between ages 30 and 40, although chil- dren can also develop them. The second form, auto- somal recessive polycystic kidney disease (ARPKD), is much less common, accounting for the remain- ing 10 percent of cases. This form requires each parent to have the abnor- mal gene, passing them to their children. There are several com- plications of PKD. High blood pressure, if left untreated, increases the risk of heart disease and stroke. Loss of kidney function and kidney fail- ure can occur as the cysts enlarge, increasing pres- sure and causing scarring of normal kidney tissue. About half of all sufferers will have kidney failure by age 60. Female PKD sufferers carry a greater risk of developing pre- eclampsia (a disorder of pregnancy). The develop- ment of liver cysts increases with age. Brain aneurysm is more likely in PKD sufferers, especially in those under age 50. Approximately one-quar- ter develop mitral valve prolapse, a type of heart valve abnormality. Chron- ic back or side pain may occur. And, finally, diver- ticulosis is more common in those with PKD. While the disease is incurable, many of the symptoms can be treated as they arise. Blood pres- sure can be controlled through diet, exercise and medication. Pain can be treated with over-the- counter and prescription pain relievers as needed. 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