Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/308196
DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman GETFUZZY DarbyConley ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARCAROLYN»My mother has been dating a guy for a few years now, and he's been living with her for over a year. In our small house we now have my mom, her partner, me (14), my two younger brothers (6 and 11), and his two sons. My mother's partner's kids (4 and 6) are, to be honest, brats. One of them we think has ADHD, making him hyper and intolerable most of the time. They throw daily tantrums and make it impossible for us to go anywhere. Their mother is no help seeing as she refuses to let one of her children get help for his ADHD, and never tells her kids, "No." My mom is forced to handle most of the discipline, since her partner never does. She's frustrated with him. How can I suggest that the whole group of adults in this situation (my mom, her partner, and his ex- wife) get these kids (ages 4 and 6) under control? —SickofThisin Wisconsin DEAR SICK OF THIS » It sounds as if you're right about the unhealthy level of chaos in your house — so right that I think it's safe to assume your mother knows (a) that the adults need to work together to (b) get the little guys under control. Mean- ing, if it were just a matter of being aware, then your mom would have been on this months ago. So before you talk to your mom, think about what she doesn't know: that the chaos is affect- ing you, for one, and your siblings, to the extent you can speak for them. That you recognize she's the only one trying to hold the line. That her frustration is showing. These could all be use- ful things for your mom to know, if you relate them to her in an understand- ing, I'm-on-your-side-but- something's-got-to-give kind of way. One way to convey that intent is, after you relate to her your frustration with the status quo, to ask if there's any way you can help. I'll suggest one right now: Purge "brat" from your vocabulary. It's possible there's a clini- cal explanation for their behavior, and it seems certain they've been badly served by the adults in their lives. There is an age at which their handling of these setbacks will be the kids' responsibility, but ages 4 and 6 aren't it. Not even close. These and all kids need love, patience and consis- tent limits, not to mention any remedial intervention they need without regard for a parent's ego or ideol- ogy. That's well above you on the family organization chart, but you can make time to give these kids some warm attention. If their motors run too fast for sitting down with a book, then you can make up goofy relays or kick a soccer ball or establish a daily, 15-minute "freeze dance" party. You and your siblings need a mother who holds her boyfriend accountable for providing these things, as a condition for keeping these families blended. Blended families require extra effort to make it work Carolyn Hax Ask Carolyn Email Carolyn Hax at tellme@washpost.com, follow her on Facebook at www.facebook.com/ carolyn.hax or chat with her online at noon Eastern time each Friday at www.washingtonpost.com. Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Aries(March21-April19) — Get back on course where your health and fitness goals are concerned. Start with a nutritional diet. If you feel good, you will excel. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — Someone will be overly sensitive. Don't waste time on a no-win situation. Move on to more valuable projects. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — You will be in a celebratory mood today. Get out and party, or find other ways to share your happiness. Your power of at- traction will help you. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — Finish any incomplete paper- work and tie up loose ends. The less you leave to chance, the better you will feel about the future. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — It's a good day to take part in net- working functions and mingle with your peers. You will make new allies and find a platform to express your plans for the future. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — You may be inundated with con- flicting information. If someone is pressuring you, back away and take time to think things over. A mistake will turn out to be costly. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — Love and romance will put a smile on your face. Plan a little surprise for someone you enjoy spending time with. Your kind gesture will pay off in many ways. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — A family member may not be interested in your plans. Give him or her space, and carry on with your agenda. A physical challenge will be stimulating and rewarding. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — A seminar, lecture or spe- cial interest group will provide the information and stimulation you desire. Attend a confer- ence or travel to an unfamiliar destination. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — Before making a finan- cial decision, consult with the people who will be affected by the choice you make. Get all of the details firsthand before you trust someone with your cash. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — You will be restless and look- ing for an adventure today. Plan a day trip or learn something new that can enhance your pro- fessional future. Don't be afraid to share your feelings. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — Get ready for a challenge and a chance to put your energy to good use. Proceed with creative plans that you've been consid- ering. You'll get the backing you need from someone important. Horoscope By Bernice Bede Osol WEDNESDAY, MAY 7 WEDNESDAY,MAY7,2014 REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM |YOURDAILYBREAK | 3 B