Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/305925
DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman GETFUZZY DarbyConley ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARCAROLYN»I'ma 21-year-old currently studying abroad at a great distance from my parents. I love my parents very much, and, as a result, we communicate frequently. During college, I would call my mother four or so times a week, but with the time difference, communica- tion here is limited to email. I have to admit, I don't mind the added distance. The problem is the distance has not decreased their protectiveness, which can be somewhat stifling. Everything from my choice to stay in on a certain night (reflecting my failure to take advan- tage of opportunities here) to why I won't take care of myself when I'm ill be- comes a subject of debate and discussion. Recently, I had a cold, and I mentioned it to justify my decision to stay inside and watch movies with a small group of friends. Every email since then has ignored anything else I've wished to say and demand- ed to know why I haven't seen the doctor, why I'm not taking care of myself. By this point, the cold has passed. But I cannot persuade them that I don't need to be rushed to the hospital. As a result, I'm tempted to stop emailing entirely. This move seems far too passive-aggressive, yet I feel that after months of this, it's long past the time where I should say something. But what? I don't want to lose touch with my parents or disappoint them, and I do genuinely enjoy emailing with them. How do I get them to trust that I know what I need, and that if I don't, figuring it out alone might be good for me? —G. DEAR G. » So, the term "helicopter parent" enters the lexicon; it becomes fashionable to tsk-tsk an entire generation of parents for stunting their precious spawn through an excess of fuss and control; the idea of "free-range" child-rearing erupts as a counterpoint; a gusher of research hits the media to confirm that, yes, bubble- wrapping children does deny them the opportunity to develop resourcefulness , coping skills and "grit" — it has more buzzwords than a beehive, this topic — and yet there are still parents so stunningly un- self-aware that they can, in all earnestness, harangue their 21-year-old offspring from a continent away over a head cold? Choosing not to email your parents anymore — or to selectively ignore any- thing that intrudes on your business — is not "passive- aggressive" (bzzzzzzz) if you send them this first: "Dear Mom and Dad. I am 21. You raised me well, and it's time to trust that. I re- spect your advice — when I ask for it, not whenever you think I need it. "To that end, I am through discussing my sniffles, justifying my choices for evening en- tertainment, or otherwise running my daily life by you for approval. "I'm doing this because I love you, and this is what I need to keep our connec- tion strong." Adult child studying abroad can't shake helicopter parents Carolyn Hax Ask Carolyn Email Carolyn Hax at tellme@washpost.com, follow her on Facebook at www.facebook.com/ carolyn.hax or chat with her online at noon Eastern time each Friday at www.washingtonpost.com. Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Taurus(April20-May20) — Get serious about your career goals. The position you desire is there for the taking. Get working to obtain whatever you need to pursue your dreams. Believe. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — Things may not turn out as you expected. Avoid an emotional outburst by taking a step back, and look at the facts objectively. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — Rumors and speculation could seriously hurt your reputation. Choose your confidants care- fully, or you could set yourself up for a real problem. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — Examine your motives before offering your leadership ser- vices. The situation should be of benefit to all concerned, not just to you. Sharing will be required. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — You need to work on soli- tary projects today. Keep a low profile. Confrontations are likely if you are trying to deal with friends, relatives or your peers. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — This will be an educational day for you. Be prepared to listen to people with more experience. You could learn about valuable strategies that can improve your future and help you achieve your objectives. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — Carefully deal with authority figures regarding legal or health issues. Do your best to obtain the necessary information to ef- ficiently solve whatever problem you face. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — Tensions will mount if your intentions are misunder- stood. Be considerate toward others, but clear and concise about what you want and are willing to offer. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — A prospective career move should be put on hold for the moment. Your peers will be glad to give you a hand if you are willing to ask for help. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — It's time for a little pamper- ing. You will feel revived if you get together with some- one you love. A change of scenery will do you a world of good. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — A current personal dilemma should be shared with a close friend. If a family situation has deteriorated, an outside per- spective may shed some light on a solution. Aries (March 21-April 19) — Don't hesitate to delve into unfamiliar territory. Keep your mind open to new experi- ences. Lucrative possibilities could be the result of an e ducational trip, excursion or conference. Horoscope By Bernice Bede Osol FRIDAY, MAY 2 FRIDAY,MAY2,2014 REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM |YOURDAILYBREAK | 5 B