Up and Coming Weekly is a weekly publication in Fayetteville, NC and Fort Bragg, NC area offering local news, views, arts, entertainment and community event and business information.
Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/1386020
6 UCW JUNE 23-29, 2021 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM PITT DICKEY, Columnist. COMMENTS? Editor@upandcomin- gweekly.com. 910-484-6200. What is so rare as a wedding in northern Virginia? Love is once again in bloom as the Rona mostly fades into the rearview mirror. Postponed nuptials spring forth unabated. We took our first big road trip since the Rona to attend the splendid wedding of my brother's granddaughter. e festivities were held in a Mega Church with 300 of the wedding party's closest friends. Having never been in an Mega Church we did not know what to expect. e Mega Church is doing something right as the congregation consisted mostly of Millennials and their kids. Many main- stream churches have aging congregation syndrome. ey tend to have as John Prine once sang, "Hearing aids in every pew." e bride's relationship to me is that of great niece once removed or something like that. It puts me in a demographic that emphasiz- es the effects of calendar creep — e.g., older than dirt. e ceremony was upbeat and filled with laughter. Although the bride and groom were no longer teenagers, to quote Chuck Berry's song "You Never Can Tell" — "You could see that Pierre did truly love the ma- demoiselle." e vows were interesting. e bride promised to joyfully and/or meekly submit to the leadership of the husband. My wife, who is a lawyer, seemed a bit surprised by this section of the vows. Personally, I thought it was a great idea. Unfortunately, I have had absolutely no luck convincing her to either meekly or joyfully submit to me. Knowing my great niece is not a pushover by any means, all I can say is good luck to the groom on that part of the vows. But as Mr. Berry said, "C'est la vie, say the old folks, It goes to show you never can tell." We wished them well. In my last column I whined about the lack of Cicadas in Fayetteville. I got my wish for an insect chorus in Virginia. e motel where we stayed was surrounded by trees featuring an abundance of Cicadas in lust. e love song of thousands of horny Cica- das sounded like Martian spaceships. It was beyond loud. It was colossal. Stupendous. e 17-year wait was worth it. em bugs can belt out a love song better than J. Alfred Prufrock. We headed into the District of Cicadas af- ter the wedding for a fact-finding mission to see how our nation's capital has survived the Rona. We had reservations at e Churchill, our favorite D.C. hotel in the Dupont Circle area. Having stayed there many times I did not read the fine print on the emailed con- firmation. Oops, large mistake. In the in- terim since our last stay, e Churchill had decided to add what they euphemistically call a "Resort Fee" of $100 a night. at is on top of the room rate. Woody Guthrie warned about Resort Fees in his song "Pretty Boy Floyd"— "I've seen lots of funny men/ Some will rob you with a six-gun/ And some with a fountain pen." It was my error by not reading the fine print so it was my fault. However, to both of my Gentle Readers, study the fine print to look for the words "Resort Fee" be- fore you confirm your reservation. You will be glad you did. Do as I say. Not as I did. D.C. is still pretty much in the depths of the Rona lockdown. Many stores have closed. People on the streets are wearing masks. Even the Starbucks only has take-out caffeine. Traffic is actually very tolerable as there ain't much. We were in walking distance of Obama's D.C. residence so we walked over to pay our respects. We got as close as the end of his street where a D.C. cop was parked. Uh oh. at did not look en- couraging. I walked over to the car as non- threateningly as I could. "Any chance we can go see the house?" I asked. "Not a chance" he replied. But I had to ask anyway. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. We had more luck with the museums. Most of the Smithsonian museums have not reopened. e ones that are open use free timed tickets to keep crowds controlled. We spent five hours in the National Gallery of Art which gave us hope that the Rona clos- ings are actually going to end at some point. After being booted out at closing time, we attempted to get an Uber ride back to our hotel. No luck. We had never been anywhere that Uber wasn't available. e Rona struck again. Plan B involved going back on the Metro. My wife is not a fan of subways but the alternative was to sleep on the street so away we walked. As we walked, a very nice lady carrying her painting of Saint Lucy approached us. Out of the blue she asked us how long we had been married. I told her 45 years. She then told us we were "cute." is officially marked the line where we went from the north end of middle aged to the elderly "cute." I have certainly been called worse things than cute. In fact, this was the first time I had ever been called cute. I wasn't even cute as a baby. When we reached the Metro it was rush hour. No crowds. Lots of empty seats. e Rona still lives in D.C. Get vaccinated. e life you save may be my own. OPINION Brides, grooms and a report from the District of Cicadas by PITT DICKEY e author shares a reaction from the pews when the bride promised to submit to the leadership of her groom.