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Friday, March 22, 2013 – Daily News 5A FEATURES Son feels left out by unfair estate plan No cure for Crohn's, guilty and obligated toward Dear Annie: I grew up Carla that they give her with a sister who had subeverything in a misguided stance abuse problems. attempt to protect her from While I studied hard, herself. You cannot fix this. ''Carla'' dropped out of But you can forgive them school and led a life of parand move forward. Accept tying. My parents always that you are not likely to get made sure she was well an equitable share of their provided for. Every time they gave her something Annie's estate. If there is a specific item that you would like to expensive, my mother have, it's OK to ask your would say, ''Don't worry, you will get the same in my by Kathy Mitchell parents whether you can and Marcy Sugar have it now, and tell them will.'' that you do not expect anyThen one day, my parents told me they had signed over thing more. Once the inheritance is the family home to Carla. She told off the table, you will be able to them I had agreed to it, but I never have a relationship with your pardiscussed it with her. But when I ents based on who they are and not said this to my parents, they yelled on what you deserve to get as a and screamed and called me a liar. reward for being a good son. Dear Annie: I've been invited to They said it didn't matter anyway because they would make it up to the wedding of an old college friend me in the will. They then told me who is gay. I am a Christian and the value of the house for the sake believe that homosexuality is a sin. of the will, which was a quarter of I will send my regrets. My question is: Do I send a gift? its actual worth. I suggested they get the house appraised, and they I know that traditional wedding etibecame angry. They also lied to our quette says to send a gift when relatives about what happened, invited, but would a gift say I although when my parents die, it approve of and support her deciwill be obvious that I received noth- sion? What should I do? — Reluctant Gift Giver ing from them. Dear Reluctant: A gift does not Annie, I have been a good son to my parents for my entire life. How indicate approval of the marriage. If can they do this to me? This hurts so that were the case, quite a few peomuch that it's the first thing I think of ple would not receive one. You send when I wake up in the morning. I am a gift to wish your friend well. If ready to walk away from my family. you do not wish your friend well, and you do not attend the wedding, I deserve better. - Left-Out Son Dear Left Out: You do deserve you do not need to send a card or a better, but your parents feel so present. Mailbox Dear Annie: This is for ''Disappearing Connections,'' the recently retired aunt who decided to ''unburden'' herself of possessions and offered some of her clothing to a niece. She's now miffed because the niece has not thanked her. Stop it! You offered your niece a bunch of clothes you no longer wanted, and she was kind enough to accept them. Now you are acting like it was a gift and she needs to send you a thank-you note for stuff you didn't want anymore. Go find a hobby, and give your clothes to a charity. Trust me, your niece does not want to wear clothes from an old lady. She was just being kind by accepting them in the first place. — Been There Dear Been There: There is NO excuse for not acknowledging receipt of a package, especially when the niece asked to have the clothes. And the clothes were indeed a gift, regardless of where they originated. How unconscionably rude to thank someone only for those gifts you like. The niece should have said the package was received and thanked her aunt for taking the time to send it. Period. Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. Shasta Wildlife Rescue's Run for the Wild Shasta Wildlife Rescue & Rehabilitation organization is opening registration for its 13th annual Run for the Wild to take place on Saturday, April 6, in the Anderson River Park. The 5-mile run is one lap around the park.There will be the 2-mile Walk/Rabbit-Run and the quarer-mile that is open for pre-schoolers through fifth grade students. The 2- and 5-mile events begin at 8:30 a.m. and the quarter-mile run begins at 10 a.m. Registra- tion is due by March 30 for adults is $15 and for persons under 18 years of age is $8. T-shirts are offered only to pre-registered runners for an additional cost of $10 per shirt. Late registration is an additional $5. Entries are available at the Fleet Feet, at various workout places in Shasta County and at the shastawildliferescue.com, Sweatrc.com websites. For more information, visit www.shastawildliferescue.com or call 365-2807. Mercy offers class to stop smoking If you're a smoker, make this the time to quit. Mercy is offering another nine session Quit for Good Class 6-8 p.m. Tuesdays through Thursdays for three weeks starting April 9. The free class will be held at Mercy Medical Center in Redding. You may already know that smoking causes lung cancer, emphysema, heart disease and many more health related illness- es, but have you considered the additional benefits of quitting? A few days after the last cigarette, the chances of having a heart attack decreases, pulse rate slows to normal, the ability to smell and taste improve, and breathing becomes easier. Within months, coughing decreases, energy level increases, and exercise becomes easier. It may take smokers more than one attempt to finally quit. Quitting is tough, but there are plenty of resources to help. Ask your doctor, and call 225-7779 to get more information about Mercy's Quit for Good smoking cessation class. The classes are free and taught by a certified Quit for Good instructor. Space is limited. For more information and to register for the class, call 225-7779 or visit redding.mercy.org. Five tips if your name has changed If you were married or divorced and changed your name last year, be sure to notify the Social Security Administration before you file your taxes with the IRS. If the name on your tax return doesn't match SSA records, the IRS will flag it as an error and that may delay your refund. Here are five tips for a person whose name has changed. They also apply if your dependent's name has changed. 1. If you have married and you're using your new spouse's last name or you've hyphenated your last name, notify the SSA. That way, the IRS comput- Baxter Black, Cowboy Poet, April 16, 7:00 p.m., State Theatre. Tickets at The Loft, Gold Exchange, Shasta Farm & Equipment, Cottonwood, Rabobank, Corning or online at www. statetheatreredbluff.com ers can match your new name with your Social Security number. 2. If you were divorced and are now using your former last name, notify the SSA of your name change. 3. Letting the SSA know about a name change is easy. File Form SS-5, Application for a Social Security Card, at your local SSA office or by mail with proof of your legal name change. 4. You can get Form SS-5 on the SSA's website at www.ssa.gov, by calling 800-772-1213 or at local SSA offices. Your new card will have the same number as your former card but will show your new name. 5. If you adopted your new spouse's children and their names changed, you'll need to update their names with SSA too. For adopted children without SSNs, the parents can apply for an Adoption Taxpayer Identification Number by filing Form W7A, Application for Taxpayer Identification Number for Pending U.S. Adoptions, with the IRS. The ATIN is a temporary Spring has Sprung, It's Time to Get Growing, We can Get You Started! INCOME TAX PREPARATION Fast, Friendly, Reasonable Fees Fee for Short or Long form includes all the tax credits and E-filing with direct Deposit. Also Bookkeeping, Payroll and Financial Services available P RALPH CAMPBELL, EA Enrolled Agent 855 Walnut St. #2 530-529-9540 WYNTOUR GARDENS 365-2256 8026 Airport Road, Redding I-5 North, Exit #673, Rt on Knighton, Rt on Airport Located 1 mile south of the Airport (Next to Kents Mkt) Open Mon-Sat 8-5 & Sunday's 10-4 wyntourgardens.com Facebook inform@wyntourgardens.com number used in place of an SSN on the tax return. Form W-7A is available on the IRS.gov website or by calling 800-TAX-FORM (800-829-3676). Additional IRS Resources: • Form W-7A, Application for Taxpayer Identification Number for Pending U.S. Adoptions • Adoption Taxpayer Identification Number but symptoms relief intestine and DEAR DOCjoints. They can TOR K: My be taken by mouth daughter has just as pills, or by recbeen diagnosed tum as an enema. with Crohn's disCertain antibiease. What is it, otics kill bacteria and what is the in irritated areas treatment? of the bowel and DEAR READER: Crohn's disDr. K may decrease inflammation. In ease is an inflamby Anthony L. matory bowel dis- Komaroff, M.D. people who have diarrhea from the ease that causes antidiarrheal abdominal pain, diarrhea, disease, loss of appetite, joint medications such as loppains, weight loss, weak- eramide (Imodium) may ness and fatigue. It's be helpful. Other, more powerful caused by inflammation of the small (and some- anti-inflammatory drugs may be helpful. But they times the large) intestine. suppress your No one knows for sure can what triggers Crohn's dis- immune system, increasease. An infection with ing your risk of infections. bacteria that live in the They are not often used on intestines may start the a long-term basis. The newest drugs process by activating the immune system. The approved for Crohn's disimmune system stays ease are called tumor active and creates inflam- necrosis factor (TNF) blockers. TNF is a submation. Usually, Crohn's dis- stance made by immune ease symptoms come and system cells that causes go. They may go away inflammation. TNF blockcompletely, and then ers have very serious side return. For many of my effects. They are generally patients with this disease, prescribed for moderate to this on-again, off-again severe Crohn's disease course of the disease is the that hasn't responded to most difficult thing to deal other therapies. Infliximab with. After a few relapses, (Remicade) and adalipeople live every day mumab (Humira) are TNF wondering if the disease is inhibitors. Surgery to remove a going to return again. The inflammation of section of the bowel is Crohn's disease involves another possible treatthe inside lining and deep- ment. It is usually er layers of the intestine reserved for severe cases. When I was in medical wall. The inside lining can thicken or wear away in school, Crohn's disease — spots. This creates ulcers, and another inflammatory cracks and fissures — lit- bowel disease called tle tunnels that burrow ulcerative colitis — were through the wall of the thought to be caused by intestine and sometimes psychological problems. spill infected material into Why was this? In my the inside of the abdomen. opinion, it's because docUlcers and inflammation tors were unable to figure can occur in all areas of out what caused it, so they the digestive tract, from assumed it must be psythe mouth to the rectum. chological. Today, we (There's an illustration on know that certain genes my website, AskDoc- are linked to the disease, torK.com.) The eyes and and that the gut's immune joints may also be affect- system is overactive. Crohn's disease is not in a ed. There is no cure for patient's head; it's in her Crohn's disease, but med- digestive tract. ications can effectively Dr. Komaroff is a improve symptoms. Most of the drugs work by pre- physician and professor Harvard Medical venting inflammation in at School. To send the intestines. go to A group of drugs called questions, or aminosalicylates is usual- AskDoctorK.com, ly the first treatment write: Ask Doctor K, 10 choice. These drugs sup- Shattuck St., Second press inflammation in the Floor, Boston, MA 02115. Community Clip? e-mail: clerk@redbluffdailynews.com or Fax: 527-9251