Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/104096
Thursday, January 17, 2013 – Daily News Breakup not going so smoothly bathed and brushed his teeth Dear Annie: I am a senior in after coming home from his high school. My boyfriend broke construction job dirty, sweaty up with me a month after he went and greasy. The problem is that off to college. We had been he stopped bathing, and I can't together for nine months, and I deal with his significant beer was devastated. He was my first belly and his horrible breath. real boyfriend. He treated me well Also, he has sinus issues and is and cried when we broke up. He constantly clearing his throat, ended our relationship because it was his first time being on his Annie's which drives me nuts. I am in good shape, and other own, and he didn't want anyone men still admire me, which only tying him down. He said he needs time to figure out his life. He by Kathy Mitchell adds to my frustration. Actually, claims I will understand when I and Marcy Sugar the frustration is turning into bitterness because he makes no go to college, and I am trying to effort to get into better shape. Now I am accept this. Our breakup was amicable, even simply turned off. We do very little though I was upset. We still text and talk together as a couple except eat. I'm sure on a regular basis. I know he has no he blames me for our lack of intimacy. Please let men know that they can't intention of getting back together, at least not now. I have seen him three expect their wives to look great while times since we broke up, and every time they let themselves go. These middle-age we end up sleeping together. He told me issues never occurred to me when I was recently that he thinks he is interested in younger. — No Longer Compatible Dear No Longer: This is part of ''in another girl. My friends say it's best if I cut all ties sickness and in health.'' You might find with him — no more talking, texting or your husband more appealing if he made seeing him when he's home for breaks. even a small effort. ''Not trying'' seems My friends have never been through like ''not caring.'' But it's possible your something like this, though, so they don't husband has some issues with depression understand how hard it would be for me and aging. See whether counseling and a to not have him in my life. Annie, what doctor's checkup help. We hope so. Dear Annie: ''Disgruntled in Califordo you think? — Confused in California Dear Confused: Please stop sleeping nia'' said her older sister kept it a secret with your ex-boyfriend. It only muddies that she saw Disgruntled's son eating in a the water and makes everything more restaurant. Good grief. She saw her adult nephew difficult. He has broken up with you, and frankly, he was right to do so. He's away eating in a restaurant, and she's supposed at school and wants to date other women. to report this to his mother? Why? DisInstead of simply cheating on you, he gruntled sounds like a helicopter sister. was honest and ended things. But contin- Older does not mean incompetent or in uing to sleep with you is taking advan- need of direction. Their relationship tage. You have to let him go. If you want might improve a whole lot if Disgruntled to remain friends, fine, but only if it attempted to be a friend instead of an doesn't include ''with benefits.'' You overbearing mother. — Sister Who need some space to get over him and Knows move on with your life. Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Dear Annie: I've never read a letter with my problem: I'm not attracted to Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime my husband anymore, and that's why editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to I'm not having sex with him. I have a stronger sex drive than my anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Mailbox, c/o Creators husband, who will be 50 soon. When we Annie's were in our 30s and he wasn't so over- Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa weight, I would initiate sex if he had Beach, CA 90254. Mailbox How to avoid toddler tantrums — Keep your child active. DEAR DOCTOR K: My todEnergetic children may need dler has frequent temper physical outlets to help avoid tantrums, and it's impossible to emotional meltdowns. If you calm him down once he gets have a high-energy child, be going. I'd rather learn ways to sure he or she gets plenty of head off his tantrums in the first active time. place. — Be consistent and have a DEAR READER: Though it schedule. Children love premay be hard to believe, tantrums Dr. K dictability — even predictably bad can actually serve a purpose. My news like it's time to go to bed. pediatrician colleagues here at by Anthony L. — Be in control. You are in Harvard Medical School tell me Komaroff, M.D. charge, not your 2-year-old. But that tantrums are your child's way of letting you know that you're not meet- if he's craving independence, give him a ing his basic needs for sleep, food, reas- sense of control by offering some limited surance, independence, calm and safety. choices. For example, if he's refusing to Provide these things, and he's less likely eat vegetables, give him a choice between broccoli and green beans. Little to fall on the floor wailing. Here are some tips our pediatricians doses of power like that will fulfill his need for independence without turning say should help: — Avoid hunger pangs. Low blood him into a tyrant or teaching him that his sugar can make kids cranky. Bring opinion doesn't matter. — Give reassurance, attention and love. healthy snacks with you to avoid a meltdown. Good options include raisins, If the only way to get your attention is by cheese and apple slices — presuming wailing, your child will quickly learn that your child is old enough for such solids. trick. Don't misunderstand: I'm not advis— Make sure your child is well-rest- ing that you ignore your crying child. ed. Most children need 10 to 12 hours of Rather, at every opportunity, show the sleep at night. Don't bring a sleep- child your attention and love — to head deprived 2-year-old to the grocery store off the tantrum from starting. An ounce of and then expect him to behave perfectly. prevention is worth a pound of cure. A great new short, inexpensive e-book (In fact, if you see me at the grocery store and I've been sleep-deprived, don't has a wealth of good information about this subject: "Taming Your Child's Temexpect me to behave perfectly, either!) — Avoid overstimulation. Whether per Tantrums" by Harvard Medical it's a visit with relatives, a birthday party School's Dr. Victoria Rogers McEvoy or another event, a young child can and Karen Weintraub. You can learn process only so much excitement. The more about this book at my website, initial laughter and enthusiasm can AskDoctorK.com. quickly give way to tears and aggressive Dr. Komaroff is a physician and behavior. If you see signs that your child is beginning to get overexcited — such professor at Harvard Medical School. To as hyperactivity and silliness — remove send questions, go to AskDoctorK.com, him from the setting for a few minutes to or write: Ask Doctor K, 10 Shattuck St., Second Floor, Boston, MA 02115. calm him down. Suspect shoots Galt officer to death, kills self GALT (AP) — A police officer in the Sacramento County city of Galt was shot to death Tuesday by a suspect who police say then fired at other officers before shooting and killing himself. Officer Kevin Tonn was fatally shot during a physical altercation with the suspect around 11:30 a.m., Galt police Lt. Jim Uptegrove said during an afternoon news conference. Tonn, 31, was shot once and died after being taken to a hospital, Uptegrove said. Tonn and other officers were responding to call about a burglary when a witness pointed to a suspect, and Tonn went to question the suspect, police said. The suspect shot Tonn as the officer approached him, Uptegrove said. ''The suspect retrieved a handgun from his person, somewhere on his body, and fired one shot at Officer Tonn,'' Uptegrove said. The suspect fired several rounds at other officers arriving at the scene, then turned the gun on himself, Uptegrove said. None of the other officers returned fire, and none were hurt, Uptegrove said. The suspect's name has not been released. Tonn, a 3 1/2 year veteran of the Galt Police Department, was a ''very well-respected, very proactive member of our department,'' Uptegrove said. The incident was the department's first deadly on-duty officer shooting since it was formed in 1946, television station KCRA reported. Galt is a community of approximately 25,000 residents about 20 miles south of Sacramento. The shooting comes less than two months after an animal control officer was shot and killed after being called to retrieve pets believed to have been left behind at a Galt home. In that incident, authorities say 45-yearold Roy Marcum was killed when a man inside the home who had been served an eviction notice opened fire with a shotgun. 3B