Issue link: http://www.epageflip.net/i/705957
DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman THEDUPLEX GlennMcCoy ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARAMY»Ihavebeen married to my husband for 10 years. Our marriage has gotten better with each passing year. I consider him a good husband, father, and my best friend. About a month ago my step- daughter told me that she found text messages between my husband and her mother (his ex-wife), in which he says that he still loves her, misses her and suggests that they meet for sex. The messages were on his ex's phone that she had given to my step- daughter for her own use. When I confronted him he initially denied it, but now admits he has spent the last six months sexting with his ex-wife. He has moved into a separate bedroom. We are getting along most of the time. He maintains that he did it for the "thrill" and that he only told her that he loved her to ma- nipulate her into sexting. He said he would never meet her in person. I know he cheated on his ex-wife when they were together, but I told myself that our relation- ship is different. We have had one counseling session, but I just don't know if I can believe him. He sent all these messages while he was at work, and while out of town visiting his parents. I had no idea. I don't know if I can trust what he says about the affair, and I do con- sider it an affair. I don't know if I can get past the betrayal. I don't know if I can or should forgive him. He seems remorseful, but he is very good at lying. What should I do? —LostandConfused DEAR LOST » I would seriously question your husband's assertion that he would never meet up with his ex in person. These two have a history; why wouldn't they? And yes, I agree that what he did was cheating. The secrecy, intimate con- tact, exchanges of sexual and loving comments — this is cheating. The burden is now on him to demonstrate to you that he can be trusted. He does this by being transparent with his phone use, participat- ing in therapy, admitting what he did and asking for forgiveness. Many marriages re- cover from cheating; this can only be done one day at a t im e , w it h bo t h p a r - ties committing every day to walk toward integrity and forgiveness together. I think you are wise to be skeptical concerning your husband's willing- ness to be faithful. This is a "trust, but verify" situation. DEAR AMY » Thank you for pointing out that men can be victims of relation- ship abuse, as described in the letter from "Mom/ Grandma." This is often seen as a problem that affects women. My son was in a violent marriage. Part of the pain was the idea that others didn't take his situ- ation seriously. — Been There DEAR BEEN THERE » The stigma surrounding rela- tionship violence needs to change. Marriage hits the skids with a virtual, but real, affair You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribpub.com and follow her on Twitter @askingamy. Amy Dickinson Ask Amy Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Cancer(June21-July22) — Put your energy into what's important and expand your in- terests and concepts while you reach for success. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — You can make positive changes if you discuss matters openly and proceed to follow through with the agreed-upon course of action. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — You should take care of your responsibilities and move on to more enjoyable pastimes. An unusual connection you have will lead to interesting events. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — Consider your current position. If you aren't satisfied with the way things are going, reconnect with an old co-worker. Some- thing good will transpire. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — You need to take care of your domestic chores before some- one criticizes you for neglecting your duties. Take on a challenge that will enlighten you. A short trip will spark a unique idea. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — Socialize with people who are heading in the same direc- tion as you. If you lose sight of your goals, you will end up at a destination that won't help you advance. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — Think about the past and use your findings to help plan for the future. You are facing a change- able time, and you should use this opportunity to explore new possibilities. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Learn from those around you. If someone makes a scene, don't get involved in the furor. A change you make will bring you good fortune and a brighter future. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — Don't make your choices based on what others do or say. Do your own thing, negotiate on your own behalf and draw up contracts that suit you. A take- charge attitude will bring good results. Aries (March 21-April 19) — Keep your money in a safe place. Don't ignore medical issues. Focus on your needs and self- improvement. Love and romance are on the rise and will help stabilize your life. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — Complaints will get you nowhere. If something needs doing, do it yourself. You only get out what you put in. Don't wait for someone else to make the first move. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — Your vocal and outgoing way of dealing with matters will help you bring about positive change. Don't trust someone else to do as good a job as you. Horoscope By Eugenia Last THURSDAY, JULY 21 | YOURDAILYBREAK | REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM THURSDAY, JULY 21, 2016 2 B