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Box 220, 545 Diamond Ave., Red Bluff, CA 96080 Facebook: Leave comments at FACEBOOK.COM/ RBDAILYNEWS Twitter: Follow and send tweets to @REDBLUFFNEWS Still recovering from the sonic bombshell dropped by Jeb Bush announcing he was officially upgrading his prospective candi- date status from considering the formation of an exploratory com- mittee to investigate the feasibil- ity of a possible run for the pres- idency to actually authorizing the formation of an exploratory com- mittee that will investigate the feasibility of a possible run for the presidency? Our little caterpillar is now one step closer to being a big bad beautiful butterfly. No one will admit the ob- vious: that the efforts of this exploratory committee could boil down to a simple poll question asking potential voters to rate how deep is their well of Bush Fatigue, on a one to five scale. With one being, "who cares what name is on the ballot, they're all big fat liars anyway" to five indicating; "read my lips, no new Bushes. Ever. Ever. Ever. Ever. Did I mention ever? Be- cause I meant to say ever. Again." (long pause) "Ever." John Ellis Bush, Jeb for the initials, is son of George Herbert Walker Bush, the 41st President of the United States and younger brother of George Walker Bush, Gwibby, the 43rd President. And proving that all things are relative, the former Florida Governor is gener- ally considered "the smart one." Since sister Dorothy is a civilian, brother Marvin is retired and other brother Neil's main claim to fame is miraculously not being in- dicted in the Silverado Sav- ings & Loan debacle dur- ing the 1980s, Jeb is the last great hope for the Bush Fam- ily to finally pull off a third invasion of Iraq and get it right. The first Republican through the gate, Jeb will need to prove to the right and the righter that the only thing he has in common with his brother, father and/ or grandfather is their name and a bucket of money. To reinforce that impression, a major order of business might be to convince Dick Cheney to shut the hell up and stop reminding people who tortured what when. Either way, the Demo- crats won't likely harp too severely on how anathema the concept of dynasty is to this country, since their own front-runner is the wife of a former president named Wil- liam Jefferson Clinton. #42. Meaning if the two of them win their parties' nomina- tions, that will make the 2016 race Bush versus Clin- ton, a re-run of the 1992 election. Giving America the same choice it had 24 years ago. Only different. And not necessarily better. Which will be great for all we comedians who can trot out our old 1992 material. It's the green thing to do. Nostalgia and recycling: to- gether again for the very first time. And for all you "his- tory repeating itself" fanat- ics, in the year 2040, 24 fur- ther years down the electoral road, Hillary & Bill's daugh- ter, Chelsea, will be 60, and Jeb's son, George P., 64 — and we can do it all over again. Again. AND... if Jeb Bush actu- ally does become the 45th POTUS, think of how great it would be for future Amer- ican elementary school chil- dren who would be able to rattle off the answer to: "name the last five presi- dents" by counting their fin- gers: "Bush, Clinton, Bush, Obama, Bush." Like a club sandwich. With the Bushes as the white bread. And what could be more apropos than that? WillDurstisanaward-win- ning, nationally acclaimed political comic. Go to will- durst.com for more about the documentary film "3 Still Standing," and a calendar guide to personal appearances such as his hit one- man show "BoomeRaging: From LSD to OMG." Email Will at durst@ caglecartoons.com. Will Durst Bushes 3, United States 0 Cartoonist's take MATSON 'Twas the day after Christ- mas, and all through the house of the Board of Supervisors, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. This is because their tasks for the year have been com- pleted to citizens' satisfaction and they can now rest on their laurels. Or can they? They were quick to put the matter regarding the separa- tion of the county from the State of California on the bal- lot, and tallied enough votes from the supposedly disenfran- chised to encourage organizers to join with three other coun- ties to petition the state on the 15th of January to allow them to steal quietly into the night. This we can do little about until it is ruled from on high that the counties can't do that. Also, during the past year, the board, via ad hoc commit- tee recommendation, decided to move the Tehama County Li- brary to a far, far better place out near the Community Cen- ter to make room for more beds for the charged, or soon to be charged, residents who illegally decided to improve their lot con- trary to the law. It is hard to ar- gue about jail expansion as op- posed to letting more scofflaws roam the streets and possibly wreak havoc upon ATMs in in- ventive ways. But there may still be time to find a new location for the library that will meet the needs of the users. I am hearing from more and more folks who prefer that the library remains downtown. Apparently what the ad hoc advisory committee did not consider was the former li- brary location at the corner of Hickory and Jefferson — known in my day as the Herbert Kraft Free Library. This magnificent and apparently sturdy edifice is for sale as is the house contigu- ous to the north. I ask, at this time, for the Board to consider the possibil- ity of expanding the Kraft to the south and west and north, the installation of an exterior elevator to access all three lev- els and the razing of the house next door for patron parking. The architectural firm recently contacted to draw plans to build a new library southwest of town, perhaps more conve- nient for patrons who prefer to fly in via the local airport to pe- ruse books in same, to pause in their quest and to consider whether the Kraft could pass muster to once again house our county library. I shudder to think of the alternative of sit- ting at card tables in front of Raley's in inclement weather to gain enough signatures to per- suade the board of the error of their ways, at least in their er- ror in the matter of the library move. ••• The missus has long shunned doughnuts until recently con- fronted with an Apple Fritter courtesy of Winchester Dough- nuts now ensconced at 219 S. Main. Plas Segura evidently knows his way around the dough business. ••• A recent advertisement in the DN indicated that author and psychic medium John Ed- wards will be "performing" in Sacramento in January. The ad added a cryptic, "A reading is not guaranteed." I am pleased to note that disclaimer. A "guar- anteed reading" might spread panic throughout the land. What is frightening is that a fellow like Edwards is let loose among the gullible. ••• Our friends at the Canadian Association of Retired People have come up with questions and answers: Q. Why should 60-year-old people use valet parking? A. Valets don't forget where they have parked your car. Q. As people age, do they sleep more soundly? A. Yes, but usually in the afternoon. ••• The December 1 issue of The New Yorker contains a fascinat- ing article by Emily Eakin titled "The Excrement Experiment" subtitled "Treating disease with fecal transplants." This is cer- tainly not everybody's cup of tea, but it appears to be a suc- cessful method of treating here- tofore untreatable diseases. You would have to read the entire article to fully understand the validity of this treatment that cures or abates Crohn's Disease as well as other autoimmune disorders, but suffice to say it works and fecal transplanta- tion is one of the top 10 medi- cal innovations of 2014. In clin- ics conducting trials, donors and recipients are given nick- names for confidentiality. Some are quite clever. For example, "Winnie The Poo," "Vladimir Pootin," "Dumpledore" and "Al- butt Einstein." The names and graphics are humorous but the process is taken quite seriously. ••• We are currently engaged in a sale of a commercial prop- erty in which one of the partic- ipants is of Hispanic descent. When it comes to signing doc- uments at the title company, it is important that all parties are on the same page. I asked if they, the title company, had a Spanish speaking officer in the event clarification was needed. The answer was surprisingly no. However, I can understand their reluctance to get into lan- guage clarification and transla- tion if, after the fact, something goes awry in the sale. However, demographic shifts suggest that it won't be long before English is the second language in the U.S. of A. ••• Four golfers were talking and one remarked how nice it would be to wake up on Christ- mas morning and go directly to the golf course without an argu- ment from their spouses. When the day arrived, they met and the first guy said, "Boy this game cost me a fortune. I had to buy my wife a diamond ring to leave her on Christmas morning." Number 2 guy said "I had to give my wife some expen- sive earrings to get out of the house." Number 3 guy said, "My wife is at home admiring her new car." They all turned to the last guy in the group who is staring at them like they all had lost their minds. "I can't believe you all went to such expense for this golf game. I woke up, slapped my wife on the rear end and said, 'Well Babe, Merry Christ- mas! It's a great morning for ei- ther sex or golf," and she said, "Better take a sweater." Robert Minch is a lifelong res- ident of Red Bluff, former col- umnist for the Corning Daily Observer and Meat Industry magazine and author of the "The Knocking Pen." He can be reached at rminchandmur- ray@hotmail.com. I say Repeated plea for reconsideration of the library relocation plan The first Republican through the gate, Jeb will need to prove to the right and the righter that the only thing he has in common with his brother, father and/or grandfather is their name and a bucket of money. To reinforce that impression, a major order of business might be to convince Dick Cheney to shut the hell up and stop reminding people who tortured what when. Assemblyman Dan Logue 150 Amber Grove Drive, Ste. 154, Chico 95928, 530 895- 4217 Senator Jim Nielsen 2634 Forest Ave., Ste. 110, Chico 95928, 530 879-7424, senator.nielsen@senate. ca.gov Governor Jerry Brown State Capital Building, Sacra- mento 95814, 916 445-2841, fax 916 558-3160, governor@ governor.ca.gov U.S. Representative Doug LaMalfa 507 Cannon House Office Building, Washington D.C. 20515, 202 225-3076 U.S. Senator Dianne Fein- stein One Post St., Ste. 2450, San Francisco 94104, 415 393- 0707, fax 415 393-0710 U.S. Senator Barbara Boxer 1700 Montgomery St., San Francisco 94111, 510 286- 8537, fax 202 224-0454 Contact your officials Robert Minch Will Durst I ask, at this time, for the Board to consider the possibility of expanding the Kraft to the south and west and north, the installation of an exterior elevator to access all three levels and the razing of the house next door for patron parking. The architectural firm recently contacted to draw plans to build a new library southwest of town, perhaps more convenient for patrons who prefer to fly in via the local airport to peruse books in same, to pause in their quest and to consider whether the Kraft could pass muster to once again house our county library. OPINION » redbluffdailynews.com Friday, December 26, 2014 » MORE AT FACEBOOK.COM/RBDAILYNEWS AND TWITTER.COM/REDBLUFFNEWS A6