Desert Messenger

April 16, 2014 www.DesertMessenger.com 11 By Jane Finley (Gypsy Jane) writer * artist * teacher * traveler The Reluctant Dancer Bandon, Oregon I never knew his name -- the el- derly man who sat so long on the bench and watched everybody else dance. After a while, as I danced near, I said, "You can dance with us if you'd like." "Oh no," he replied and waved us away. He continued to sit on the bench the whole evening -- never danced once. I always won- der why people come to dances if they don't dance. Finally, I went over to him and said, "Let's dance." He shrunk back while replying, "I don't know how." Even though he was inside, he had on a heavy knitted cap and sweater -- maybe handmade. "Take off your hat and sweater," I said as I pulled him to his feet, "It's easy." I took both his hands in mine. "Just move to the music." After a few minutes, I let go of his hands, "Just do anything you want," I said, "Feel the music." Then, "Move your hands and arms Traveling with Gypsy Jane a bit more." He was doing surpris- ingly well, and it appeared that he wanted to do it. Next I hooked my elbow through his, and we did a do-si-do right, then left. He wasn't what I'd call a fantastic dancer, but he WAS dancing. To my surprise, when the music stopped, the whole room broke into applause. Apparently the guy comes every week but had never danced before. (I must admit I felt just a little bit like a saint!) He thanked me, and we took our respective seats across the room from each other. We both sat out the next dance, and I had the feeling that he was going to sit out the dances for the rest of the eve- ning. I couldn't let that happen. I went over to three women who were sitting and chatting on the sidelines -- good dancers. "Someone needs to ask him to dance," I said. They hesi- tated; I sat there. "He really needs to continue dancing," I added, "or all this will be lost." We all sat there for a few minutes. They probably knew I wasn't going to give up. Then one of the women got up, went over to him, and asked him to dance. She was very good with him -- kindly, gently leading him along. When I looked back later, they were still dancing. She spent a long time with him. One of the fellas I danced with told me a bit about the elderly gentle- man. Apparently he was a widower, his wife having died about a year ago. It touched my heart to think how lonely he must be -- lonely enough to come to these dances by himself; trying anyway he could to escape the loneliness of life without his partner. How brave of him! To leave his home and venture out to a dance, even if he just watched. Loneliness can do that to you -- force you out of your shell no matter what. Even the unknown is better than the loneliness of an empty house with the four walls closing in. (I remember...) He didn't dance every dance, but I noticed different women danc- ing with him off and on during the evening. And you know what? He danced the last dance, and I noticed that he was doing pretty well! When your life is at an end, ask yourself these two questions: Did you bring joy? Did you fi nd joy? Tom Owen-Towle Author of the book "Wholly Joy" This column consists of stories from Jane's book "WANDERINGS: Liv- ing the Ordinary Extraordinarily (Stories from the Road)." Her email is: janefi nley@yahoo.com. Town of Quartzsite Recreation Dept. 928-927-4333. Quartzsite Town Park Saturday, April 19th 9:00 am sharp! "Our greatest asset is our people - those who live here and those who work here." (760) 922-8176 285 W. Chanslor Way, Blythe, CA 92225 www.BlytheNursing.com Full Skilled Nursing Services including: • Licensed Nursing care managing Intravenous Therapy, Gastric, Tube Feedings, Post-Operative and End-of-Life Care, Pain Management, etc. • Transportation from the discharge hospital - and follow-up visits to physician's offi ce - can be arranged and paid by our facility Physical Therapy Our Facility won the Top Quality Award from the American Health Care Association which placed us as 1 of the 68 facilities in the nation to receive this level and 1 of 8 facilities in the state! Across from McDonald's • Quartzsite NEED CASH? Jim Buys GOLD! Broken Jewelry, Old Teeth, Coins, Nuggets, etc. 1240 W. Main Street

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