CityView Magazine

CityViewNC.com | 5 EDITOR'S CORNER The 'stuff' of life and how it tells your story BY BOBBY PARKER Bobby Parker is assistant editor of CityView. Contact him at bparker@cityviewnc.com. Bobby Clutter. Who's to say what you don't need and what you do? "It's not hoarding if your stuff is cool," said a dear old friend in response to a Facebook post about what I bought at a recent estate sale. Never mind that we moved from a six-bedroom house on nearly 5 acres just a few years ago to a second-story condo with five compact rooms near Lake Norman. Never mind that downsizing meant renting a booth at one of those "antiques and collectibles" malls to come to terms with your current reality. You have to wonder what a word like "collectibles" means in that circumstance. For us, it was basically all the things you used to think you need and no longer have room for. e "estate" I reference is that of Bob and Sylvia Ray, whose home on Hillside Avenue in the heart of Haymount, just around the corner from our current townhouse. I walk my dog, Lexi, past it every morning. It's an elegant Colonial with an expansive garden, one where this obviously gracious couple posted a "welcome" sign that invited visitors to stroll through "at your own risk." Bob Ray was a lawyer, aer all. I never knew Bob and Sylvia. But aer wandering through the rooms of their intriguing and historic home, I feel a connection. e furniture, the Karastans, the artwork, the kitchen are all what we would have done with the place. I can see them opening those huge pocket doors and welcoming their guests into the dining room. Crystal barware. North Carolina pottery. Christmas trinkets. Craique carved furniture. But more important is that it is "stuff " that tells a story. Stuff that tells their story. Like Broadway playbills from shows such as "A Funny ing Happened on the Way to the Forum," and programs from the Metropolitan Opera. Like framed maps of North Carolina historical sites and dozens of dolls any collector would envy. Vinyl albums, 45 rpms, CDs and a dozen boxes of those now-forgotten slide carousels stashed away in the attic, never again to be projected on that pull-out screen standing next to them. e music you love tells a lot about who you are. We would have bonded over their Vivaldi, Barbara Cook, Madonna and, on the right occasion, John Cougar. (Yes, he was John Cougar before he went back to Mellencamp.) I bought way too much at the Bob and Sylvia Ray estate sale. I couldn't help myself. A couple of pieces of furniture; a couple of beautiful paintings; two sturdy concrete planters. We'll make room for that antique china cabinet. You've got to get your Real Old Willow out of the boxes at some point, right? Don't get me wrong: e real value in life is human connections and your relationships with family and friends. All the rest is just stuff. But it's stuff that matters. It tells the story of your life: where you came from, where you went, what you cared about. e importance of stuff is what it says about who you are. Someday, my estate will be for sale. If you look at what I le, you'll know a lot about who I was. In this issue: Columnist Mary Zahran knows what I'm saying when I talk about stuff; she's making the hard choices about what to keep (Page 6). As for fellow columnist Claire Mullen? She's opted to bless her mess (Page 8). Writer Jami McLaughlin and photographer Cindy Burnham catch up with the backyard chicken craze (Page 12). Have you seen the prices for eggs these days? Somehow, I think you've heard that news. The importance of stuff is what it says about who you are. Someday, my estate will be for sale. If you look at what I left, you'll know a lot about who I was.

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