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4B Daily News – Saturday, August 11, 2012 FEATURES Coed worries about future of relationship lege student and only get to see my long-distance boyfriend once every four or five weeks. We've been dating for more than 18 months. Assuming we stay together through grad school, we will have dated longer than six years before we have the chance to live together. Since I haven't spent all that much time with him, my biggest fear is that we won't get along once we settle down. So far, the longest stretch of time we've spent in each other's company is six days. What if, by the time graduation rolls around, I discover that I've fallen in love with the idea of my boyfriend instead of the real deal? -- Undergrad Dear Undergrad: Believe it or not, some couples don't live together before marriage and still manage to have happy, compati- ble lives. But you do have a legit- imate concern about how little time you've spent in each other's company, and your articulation about "falling in love with love" might be accurate. So don't make any sudden plans. If you find yourself seriously attracted to someone else, it means you aren't ready to commit to your boyfriend. If you still want to be with him when you are no longer separated by distance, take the time to determine whether it's the real deal. No one should feel rushed into marriage. Dear Annie: My sister, Dear Annie: I'm a col- "Jane," was divorced a few years ago. She's been see- ing a counselor for two years because she enabled her lazy husband. Annie's Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar and anger. You've been a supportive sis- Here's the problem. Jane has "adopted" my family because one of her sons has disowned her, his wife won't speak to her because Jane verbally attacked her, and her other son wants to be left alone for a while. Jane wants to be invited to be with my family. If there is a birth- day or wedding, even on my hus- band's side, she has to send a card. She insisted on sending a get-well card to a distant cousin- by-marriage whom she barely knows. If there is a holiday, ter, but we recommend you set clear boundaries so Jane under- stands the limits of your toler- ance. It's also OK to tell her that her complaints indicate that she is bitter and unhappy, and gently suggest that she discuss these things with her therapist. Dear Annie: "Uncertain and Afraid" said her husband flirts aggressively with the waitresses at the bars they frequent. Jane also is very domineering. She rips things out of my hand to put them away. She makes demeaning remarks about people and isn't happy with anything. Her co-workers don't do the work right, the neighbors do everything wrong, etc., etc. I could go on, but I don't want to sound like her. What do I do? -- Texas Sister Dear Texas: Let's separate this into sections. If Jane wants to send birthday, holiday or get-well cards to anyone, that's fine. These sentiments are harmless and are often appreciated by the recipi- ents, even if they seem a little strange to you. Jane clings to your family because she can't be with her own, so it is a kindness to include her whenever possible. The rest sounds like depression my first husband. He was a good man, but he drank too much. He couldn't hold a job, and we lost our home. We divorced. I married a second time to another drinker, but I put my foot down, saying I would leave him unless he quit. I never had a problem with my own alcohol consumption, but when he agreed to quit, I quit with him. Neither of us ever touched anoth- er drop of alcohol. Life was good, and we lived together happily for the next 40 years. I was married for 23 years to I would advise "Uncertain" to stop aiding and abetting her hus- band's drinking problem by drinking with him, because that's what she's doing. -- Been There Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. Always call 811 before digging On Aug. 11, Pacific Gas and Electric Compa- ny (PG&E) reminds resi- dential and business cus- tomers to call 811 to have underground utility lines marked prior to any digging project. Every three minutes nationwide, an under- ground utility line is damaged during a dig- ging project. These acci- dents can happen in a resident's backyard, not just on heavy construc- tion projects. Striking a single utili- ty line can lead to injury, repair costs, fines and inconvenient service outages. Every digging project, no matter how large or small, warrants a call to 811. Some exam- ples include installing a mailbox, building a deck, planting a tree and laying a patio. homeowners and exca- vating contractors to Underground Service Alert (USA). This free service notifies utility companies about any type of excavation pro- ject. A call to 811 connects Utilities then dispatch professional locators to the requested digging site to mark the approxi- mate locations of under- ground lines with flags, chalk-based spray paint or both. receive a list of notified utilities that may have underground lines in the area. If you believe • Customers will utility may not have marked its lines, call 811 again to notify USA. • On paved surfaces, mark the proposed exca- vation area with white chalk-based paint. Homeowners can also use other white sub- stances such as sugar or flour. a PG&E offers these tips for a safe excava- tion: • Call 811 at least two working days before and up to 14 calendar days in advance of an excavation or digging project. utility line. • Be careful not to erase facility marks while working. If you cannot see the markings, call 811 and request a remarking. • On unpaved surfaces use flags or stakes to mark the proposed exca- vation area. • Carefully use hand tools to excavate within 24 inches on either side of a utility-marked facil- ity. Digging even a few inches deep can pose some risks of striking a active for 28 days. Noti- fy USA if work contin- ues beyond that time. Immediately notify utilities about any type of contact or damage to wires or pipes. If there is any damage to PG&E electric wires or gas pipelines, or if there is a possible gas leak, take these steps: Move to a safe location; Call 911; Call PG&E at 1-800-743-5000. For more information about 811 and safe dig- ging practices, visit www.call811.com. 811 requests are Blood in urine has many potential causes TOR K: My doc- tor did a urine test and says I have hematuria. What is this? And what could have caused it? DEAR READ- ER: Hematuria is the presence of red blood cells in the urine. It means there is bleeding somewhere in your kid- neys, your prostate (if you're a man) or your bladder. If there are a lot of red blood cells, you will see them: They will turn your urine pink or red. DEAR DOC- If there are only a small number of red blood cells, you won't see them, but they will show up when the doctor looks at your urine under the microscope. There are many possi- ble causes of hematuria. Usually they are not serious problems, but sometimes they are very serious. to find what's causing the hematuria. — Strenuous exercise can produce blood in the urine, believe it or not. You won't usually see it, but if you go to your doctor for a checkup right after exercising, blood may show up in your urine. This is harm- less. So doctors always try — Urinary tract infection in your bladder or kidney often causes hematuria, although it's the pain with urination and having to go fre- quently, not a change in urine color, which is the most common reason that people call the doc- tor. Dr. K by Anthony L. Komaroff, M.D. patient who had hematuria after being hit hard in the back during a football game. — Bleeding disorders such as hemophilia can cause hematuria. — Blood thin- ners can cause hematuria. lonephritis, a family of diseases that damage the filtering units of the kid- neys, can cause red blood cells to leak out of the kidney. — Tumors in the kid- — Glomeru- ney or bladder are what we worry about most when we see hematuria. Depending on your symptoms, there are a number of tests your doctor is likely to order. These include simple tests like a repeat urinal- ysis, a urine culture (to look for bacterial infec- tion), or blood tests to check for signs of infec- tion, kidney failure, ane- mia, bleeding disorders or conditions that lead to kidney stones. The tests may be more complicated, such as a CT scan or an ultra- sound to take a picture of your kidneys, ureters and bladder. The most complicated test is a cystoscopy, in which you receive anesthesia and have a tube passed into your bladder to look for tumors or other caus- es of bleeding. Finally, you should — Kidney stones can form inside the kidney and get stuck there or in the tubes draining the kidney, causing bleed- ing. Some kidney stones cause severe pain, but some stones are "silent" — with hematuria being the only clue they are there. to any part of the urinary tract often causes hema- turia. I had one teenage — Traumatic injury know about a surprising- ly common condition that turns your blood pink or red but is not hematuria. It's called "beeturia." If you eat beets, the red coloration in the beets can briefly turn your urine red and scare you half to death, but it's nothing to worry about. (Dr. Komaroff is a physician and professor at Harvard Medical School. To send questions, go to AskDoctorK.com, or write: Ask Doctor K, 10 Shattuck St., Second Floor, Boston, MA 02115. $99 Blinds Need Blinds? C A L L P A U L Blinds & Draperies www.nsbd.biz Lic.#906022 527-0842 North State Paul Stubbs Flooring Commercial ~ Residential Tim Mowris Floors • Install and/of Repair Carpet • Vinyl • Tile •Subfloor Licensed and Insured 33 years experience (530) 200-2371 Cont. Lic#515214 Print Runs Every Tuesday - Thursday- Saturday On-Line runs 7 days a week, On-Line Print and No early cancellation, non-refundable Clock Repair Contractor When you want it done right ... HIRE A LICENSED CONTRACTOR! 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