Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/710673
DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman THEDUPLEX GlennMcCoy ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARAMY»I'minmy early 50s. When I was a teenager, I had a sexual encounter with my first cousin. We did not "go all the way ," b ut it was pret ty intense. We were curious kids; I was naive and he was probably happy to "get some." I have not seen him since then, but I have not been able to put it behind me. His parents (my aunt and uncle) are getting on in years. They will eventu- ally pass away and I can't tell you how uncomfort- able I will feel having to face this guy when it's time for the funerals. There is no graceful way to not attend the funerals, which, by the way, is the only reason I will have to ever be in the same room with him. My question is: Why, after all these years, can I not forgive myself? Having raised a family, I have dealt with my own children's exploration in their lives. I understand it is a necessary part of maturing and becoming an adult. So why can't I get over it? If I do take the chicken's way out, what kind of excuse could I come up with to politely avoid the whole scene? —Worried DEAR WORRIED » Your en- counter crossed a bound- ary, which many consider "taboo," but which is probably more common than you believe. First cousins do occasionally behave sexually with one another, and sometimes fall in love, marry and have children together. Based on your experi- ence as a parent, you say you understand your own children's sexual experi- mentation as an impor- tant part of the maturing process, and yet you won't let yourself off the hook for engaging in this yourself. Was there something about this encounter that, in retrospect, you believe was exploitative? It seems strange that you haven't seen this cousin in 30 years. If you had seen him, you might have processed this expe- rience by now. Instead, it seems to have grown and assumed an overwhelm- ing emotional weight. This is an ideal issue to take to a therapist. You should forthrightly tackle the shame you seem to feel over this sexual encounter. Talking about it will help you, regardless of whether you plan to at- tend a future funeral. If you don't want to at- tend a funeral where this cousin would be present, then you don't need to lie. Express your condolences and memorialize the family member through flowers and/or a note say- ing, "I'm thinking of your family, and wish I could be wit h you all to day." DEAR AMY » That ques- tion from "Sad Designer," who was so upset because their "mentee" didn't hire them to make a wedding dress? Clearly that person has never dealt with the nightmare of hiring friends/family members for wedding-related ser- vices. I loved your answer. — Been There DEAR BEEN THERE » Exact- ly. A tulle-covered bullet was definitely dodged. Taboo teenage encounter has led to many decades of doubt You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribpub.com and follow her on Twitter @askingamy. Amy Dickinson Ask Amy Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Leo(July23-Aug.22)— Don't wait for others to do things for you. Bring about posi- tive changes at home or to you personally and reap the rewards. Love is in the stars. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — Share your thoughts and make an offer to someone that will encourage a vacation spent exploring unique living arrangements. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — You will gain stability if you use your skills to help others. A positive change with regard to a personal relationship looks promising in the long run. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — You'll be caught between a rock and a hard place when it comes to satisfying your per- sonal and professional desires. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — Set your plans according to what's possible. If you take on too much, you will fall short on all counts. Look for truth and facts, not fast talk and persua- sive tactics. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — Do your homework and you'll get exactly what you want. A last-minute alteration will play on your emotions. Stay true to your decision regardless of what others do. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Demonstrate exactly what it is you want and expect from others and you will bypass dilly- dallying that accomplishes little. Your ability to adapt will help you move forward. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — Your talents will be recog- nized but also scrutinized. Be ready to handle anyone who acts out of jealousy. You've worked hard, and you deserve to reap the rewards. Aries (March 21-April 19) — Put travel plans into play. Set your itinerary and put together a budget that will allow you to enjoy the most important aspects of your trip. Romance is encouraged. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — Use your voice to bring about positive change. A solution or suggestion you offer will be met with interest. Travel and learning will complement one another. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — Travel will encourage new friendships. Participate in ac- tivities that bring out the best in you. Put your needs first and let your actions speak for you. Posi- tive change is reachable. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — Expand a personal pleasure or interest you have and clear a space at home to motivate you to follow through. Show off your uniqueness and you'll attract someone as special as you. Horoscope By Eugenia Last WEDNESDAY, AUG. 3 | YOURDAILYBREAK | REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 3, 2016 4 B