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Thursday, May 24, 2012 – Daily News FEATURES Frustrated by father's cold shoulder and I have never had the best relationship. He was domineering, controlling and verbally abusive to me as a teenager, and as a result, I rebelled and did things specifically to irri- tate him. Several times, he kicked me out of the house, saying I forced him to behave the way he did. I always apologized because it was easier if I kept the peace. Dear Annie: My father stopped talking to me or for- get him? — Confused and Exhausted child's benefit. — The Girlfriend Dear Girlfriend: Since your Annie's Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar Three years ago, my parents sep- arated. Just before Mom and I moved out, Dad and I got into a huge argument, and he nearly punched me. I did not speak to him for six months. Since then, there's been a thaw in our relationship. He even apologized (which he never does) and seemed more understand- ing. When I saw him at Christmas, we had a great time together. However, he hasn't spoken to me since then. There was no fight or argument. I've tried to call him sev- eral times to make plans or just talk, and he has ignored my calls and doesn't respond to my voicemails. He broke every coffee date I made, and instead of telling me, he informed my brother or mom that he couldn't make it. Dad is obviously avoiding me, behalf and find out whether you have unintentionally done some- thing to aggravate the relationship and how you can repair it. Learning to get along with someone who pushes all your buttons requires ongoing effort. Since it's your father, we think it's worth another try. Dear Confused: Your relationship with your father is tenuous, and it's possible that maintaining his equilib- rium around you is stressful for him. And although his behavior may be difficult, your response likely has its flaws, too. If you want to know what's going on, please ask your mother or brother to intercede on your My boyfriend has an adult son who is autistic. After he and his ex sepa- rated, she started telling the son hor- rible lies about both of us. The son believes her and now Dear Annie: I am boiling mad. boyfriend is still paying child sup- port, he may be entitled to regularly enforced visitation with his son. Also, some courts are beginning to recognize and address parental alienation. Please suggest to your boyfriend that he discuss his options with a lawyer who has experience in this area. Dear Annie: I read the letter from ''Jim in Peoria,'' who has been married for 42 years and his wife won't ''allow'' him to do any of the household chores. TOR K: I never thought snacking could be part of a healthy diet. Am I wrong? Can you give me sugges- tions for healthy snacking? DEAR DOC- wants nothing to do with his father or me. The boy used to speak to us, but now runs the other way when he sees us coming. but I have no idea why. I'm tired of his imaginary issues and "nobody loves me'' attitude. Should I con- front him and find out why he What can we do about this? Please don't say talk to the ex-wife. She is the source of the problem. My boyfriend is paying child sup- port but doesn't get to spend any time with his son. Also, we suspect little of the money is going for the I am thoroughly appalled that men do not stand up for themselves, all in the name of keeping peace in the house. I am a divorced man. This woman should be thankful her husband wants to do something to balance out the chores. Nobody could tell me I couldn't wash dish- es, cook or do anything else in my own house. He has just as much of a right to do what he wants in that house as she does. Walking around on eggshells in your own home is NOT worth a marriage certificate. — Danny in Shreveport Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. Tips keep pets, utility employees safe Utility employees enter yards and homes on a daily basis to provide gas and electric services to their cus- tomers. This routine part of the job can lead to hazards when dog owners leave their pets loose. Prevention Week, May 20- 26, Pacific Gas and Electric Company (PG&E) and other utilities remind cus- tomers to keep dogs secure whenever a utility employee is scheduled to visit a home or business. This National Dog Bite According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, dogs bite about 4.5 million Americans each year. One in five dog bites results in injuries that require medical attention. Although children are the most common victims, dozens of utility employees in California are moderately to severely injured by dogs each year. Here are some more protective in the pres- ence of their owners. Make sure your dog is securely confined where it cannot come into contact with the utility employee. • Post a Beware of Dog sign on your fence or house to avoid any surprises. • Leave a note on your tips to help prevent dog bites and provide a safe environment for both your pets and utility employees: • Securely confine or relocate your dog during scheduled customer service visits and when it's time for utility employees to read your meter. • Contact your local util- ities or check your monthly bills for the dates when util- ity workers are scheduled to conduct meter readings. On those days, leave gates unlocked and keep your dogs or other pets securely confined in another section of the property. • If the employee is out- side, keep your dog secure- ly confined inside. If the employee is inside, keep your dog securely confined outside. Dogs may become meter explaining that you have a dog and how and where it is confined. • Be sure all vaccinations and inoculations for rabies and parasites are up to date. •Train your dog to obey simple commands like "sit," "stay," "no" and "come." Obedience train- ing can teach dogs proper behavior and help owners control their dogs in any situation. • Collar your dog, so you 3B Healthy snacking can ease hunger So what should you snack on? To start, keep some fresh fruit on hand. Bring a banana to work. Keep a bowl of grapes or cherries on the kitchen table. DEAR READ- ER: Snacking is not automatically unhealthy. In fact, it can be very healthy — but you have to choose the right foods and eat them in the right amounts. Plenty of healthy foods are quick and easy to eat. Fruits, veggie sticks and moderate amounts of nuts are all good choices. But even healthy snacks can be unhealthful if you eat too much. Try to keep snacks to around 150 calories. Dr. K by Anthony L. Komaroff, M.D. have the means to quickly restrain your dog in any emergency. • If you get a new dog, contact your local utilities to let them know. $99 Concrete CHAPMAN CONCRETE CONSTRUCTION All phases of concrete Residential - Commercial Regular - Decorative • Remove and Replace • Overlaps and Restoration Bud Chapman Free Estimates 530-840-6549 Lic#719972 Landscape/Fence & Landscape Service Steve's Tractor • Fence Building • Landscaping • Trenching • Rototilling • Disking • Mowing • Ridging • Post Hole Digging • Blade Work • Sprinkler Installation • Concrete Work Cont. 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Call us at Contractor When you want it done right ... HIRE A LICENSED CONTRACTOR! Complete directory of Tehama County contractors online, listed by specialty on 2011 Contractors Guide under "Special Sections" www.RedBluffDailyNews.com Click on Plumbing/Handyman Jim the Plumber and Handyman Services 25 years experience Free Estimates Free Travel Time See Angie's List No Job to small Quality work ...cheaper! Local References (530)366-6033 24 hour service Lic#11003 25% off with price matching 528-1456 BAKER ROAD STORAGE all units Dried fruit can be a good choice if you keep portion size reasonable. Both fresh and dried fruits contain plenty of vitamins and fiber. Try small amounts of unsalted or lightly salted nuts. Almonds, walnuts, cashews and other nuts contain many nutrients. And although some are high in fat, the fat is mainly unsaturated "good" fat. Nuts have lots of calories, though, so keep portion sizes small. I always have small bags of nuts in my desk drawer. Each bag con- tains about 100 calories. Either in the middle of the morning or afternoon, when I'm between meals and starting to get hun- gry, I finish off a bag. But my deal with myself is just one bag a day. Unsalted seeds are also nutritious and healthy — sunflower or roasted pumpkin seeds, for example. Try to eat snacks with a combination of protein, fat and carbohydrate. Have a few nuts (protein and fat) and some grapes Blinds Need Blinds? C A L L P A U L Blinds & Draperies www.nsbd.biz Lic.#906022 527-0842 North State Paul Stubbs Dump Service Small Tractor & Dump Service • All phases of construction • Gravel delivery (2-4 yards) R & R Northern California Contractor Phone (530) 529-1041 (530) 227-9498 Lic.# 478739 CA# 282782 CB# 55J55 Storage Spread a small amount of peanut butter on apple slices or celery sticks. Whole-grain snacks, such as whole-grain, low- salt pretzels and high- fiber, whole-grain cere- als, can give you some energy with staying power. Choose these over snacks made with refined flour. We have more infor- mation on healthy food choices in our Special Health Report, "Healthy Eating: A Guide to the New Nutrition." (Learn more about this report at AskDoctorK.com, or call 877-649-9457 toll-free to order it.) Finally, always plan ahead. If you think you might get hungry while you're out and about, carry a small bag of healthful snacks with you. Mix and match healthy items. Try baby carrots with yogurt. Dip wheat crackers in guacamole. (carbohydrate). Eat whole-grain crackers (carbo- hydrate) with some low-fat cheese (protein and fat). Snacking also helps you from getting hungry between meals. When you're really hungry, you'll eat more than you should. Your hunger can make you eat quickly (like finishing a big meal in 15 minutes). However, it takes time (20 to 30 minutes after you start eating) for your brain to turn down your appetite. You may need only 1,000 calories at a meal, but before you know it, you've eaten 2,000 calo- ries. Healthy snacking can quiet your appetite and lead to smaller, more healthful meals. Dr. Komaroff is a physician and professor at Harvard Medical School. To send questions, go to AskDoctorK.com, or write: Ask Doctor K, 10 Shattuck St., Second Floor, Boston, MA 02115. 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