Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/6263
Dear Annie: I have two 21-year- old granddaugh- ters who live in different states. My son was never married to ''Shan- non's'' mother, and there are a lot of hard feelings between them. My other granddaugh- ter, ''Christy,'' recently married, and I traveled to another state to attend her wedding. At Christy's wedding reception, my husband and I were seated with both of our sons and the bride's mother. There was room at our table for Shannon and her boyfriend, so I invited them to sit with us, but she refused. I didn't understand why, so I went over to talk to her. Christy saw me and told her father that I was not permitted to talk to Shannon at her wedding. When I was informed of this, I was taken by sur- prise and could not believe Christy would make the effort to order me around at her own reception. I thought I had a good rapport with her. I love both of my granddaugh- ters, but I am very hurt by their rude behavior. I have been helping them with college and giving them holiday and birth- day gifts, but I no longer want to contribute anything toward either of them. What is happening in our world that a 21-year-old has the nerve to tell her 77-year-old grandmother who she can and cannot speak to? I want them to learn that there are conse- quences for their actions. Should I ignore their behavior or stop all pay- ments? — Troubled Grandmother Dear Troubled: Shan- non was not being rude when she refused to join your table. She was trying to avoid an argument. Christy, however, showed terrible manners and has no business dictating which grandchildren you can speak to, especially at her wedding, which is a family occasion. Punish- ing her financially is up to you, but be sure to explain why you are unhappy with her disrespectful behavior. Dear Annie: Whenev- er I'm upset or elated, I tend to shout out four-let- ter words. However, now that I have small children, I would really like to stop this bad habit. It happens frequently enough that I know they will soon start repeating what they hear. Please help. — Don't Want to be a Sailor Dear Sailor: Some people have a neurologi- cal condition that inhibits their ability to control the words they say when upset or elated. If you think this might be your problem, ask your doctor to check you for Tourette syndrome. However, if this is sim- ply an ingrained bad habit developed over the past several years, you can learn to stop. Being aware of it is the first step. The next step is putting your brain in gear when you speak, and not only in front of your children. Do it consistently every- where. When you are excited, be especially slow to open your mouth so you have time to censor what you are going to say. This takes time and prac- tice, but you are motivated to do it, so we have every confidence you'll suc- ceed. Dear Annie: This is in response to ''Concerned Paw Paw,'' whose 5-year- old great-granddaughter spit at him. Yes, little children mis- behave from time to time, but a 5-year-old is plenty old enough to be taught firmly to show respect. If my 5-year-old daughter ever did such a thing to my parents or grandparents, she would not only be made to apologize, but would be punished soundly. Discomfort around rel- atives you rarely see is understandable, but spit- ting is not. At 5, she is too old to get away with that behavior. Shame on her parents. — Sensible Mom Dear Mom: We absolutely agree that the parents should have told their child to apologize to her great-grandfather. Rude behavior can be cor- rected. But we also think it wouldn't hurt for ''Paw Paw'' to get to know his great-granddaughter a lit- tle better. Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.n et, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. 2A – Daily News – Monday, January 25, 2010 THE VOICE OF TEHAMA COUNTY SINCE 1885 Editor: Chip Thompson editor@redbluffdailynews.com Sports Editor: Rich Greene sports@redbluffdailynews.com Circulation Manager: Kathy Hogan khogan@redbluffdailynews.com Production Manager: Sandy Valdivia sandy@redbluffdailynews.com On the Web: www.redbluffdailynews.com MAIN OFFICE: Monday-Friday, 9 a.m. - 5 p.m. Main Phone (530) 527-2151 Outside area 800-479-6397 545 Diamond Ave. Red Bluff, CA 96080 ______________________ Mail: Red Bluff Daily News P.O. Box 220 Red Bluff, CA 96080 Fax: (530) 527-5774 ______________________ CUSTOMER SERVICE: Subscription & delivery Monday-Friday, 8 a.m. - 5 p.m. (530) 527-2151 Ext. 125 Home delivery subscription rates (All prices include all applicable taxes) Monday through Saturday $9.59 four weeks Rural Rate $10.69 four weeks Business & professional rate $2.21 four weeks, Monday-Friday By mail: In Tehama County $12.29 four weeks All others $16.23 four weeks (USPS 458-200) Published Monday through Saturday except Sunday, by California Newspaper Partnership. NEWS News Tip Hotline: 527-2153 FAX: (530) 527-9251 E-mail: clerk@redbluffdailynews.com Daytime: (530) 527-2151 Sports: Ext. 111 Obituaries: Ext. 103 Tours: Ext. 112 After hours: (530) 527-2153 ______________________ ADVERTISING Monday-Friday, 9 a.m. - 5 p.m. Display: 527-2151 Ext. 122 Classified: 527-2151 Ext. 103 Online (530) 527-2151 Ext. 133 FAX: (530) 527-5774 E-mail: advertise@redbluffdailynews.com VOLUME 125, NUMBER 55 A MediaNews Group Newspaper The Red Bluff Daily News is an adjudicated daily newspaper of general circulation, County of Tehama, Superior Court Decree 9670, May 25, 1955 © 2010 Daily News N EWS D AILY RED BLUFF TEHAMA COUNTY SPECIAL PAGES ON THE FOLLOWING DAYS Mondays: Kids Corner Tuesdays: Employment Wednesdays: Business Thursdays: Entertainment Fridays: Select TV Saturdays: Farm, Religion HOW TO REACH US Publisher & Advertising Director: Greg Stevens gstevens@redbluffdailynews.com $ Money $ 2 Lend Cash 4 Notes McKinley Mortgage Co. CA DRE # 01773837 Call 530-241-0977 800-909-1977 649 Main Street Downtown Red Bluff GAYLE'S 1/2 off Jan 25 th - Jan. 30 th Winter Sleepwear & Robes Drop Off Sites in Downtown Businesses Thank you from D.R.B.B.A. Collecting until February 14th Food From the Heart Canned Food Drive ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ MONDAY KIDS BOWLING CLUB 365 S. Main St., Red Bluff 527-2720 EACH BOWLER RECEIVES.. A Custom Fitted Bowling Ball! Ages 6 to 14 HERE'S WHAT YOU GET EACH WEEK... 2 Games of Bowling Free use of rental shoes Instructional Coaching Scorekeeping Service Awards at program end $ 9.50 Per bowler Per week 12 Week SESSION STARTS Jan. 25, 2010 Mondays 1:30pm $10.00 Registration FEE for new bowlers Call to reserve your spot!!! Limited Spaces Available DW PLUMBING INC. Local Plumbers Serving all Your Plumbing Needs Since 1993 530 527-6403 Lic. No 679492 Major Credit Cards Accepted Community people & events New T New T eacher Installed eacher Installed In Schools In Schools The crowded condition of the grammar schools in Red Bluff have made it necessary for the trustees to employ another teacher to relieve the congestion, and they have consequently engaged Miss Alice Cooper to begin the work next Thursday. Miss Cooper at present is at Finley Lake but telephoned the board yesterday that she would report for duty on the above date. The extra teacher will be installed in the Lincoln street building and will take the overflow from the fourth and sixth grades. The attendance in the school at present is nearly one hundred more than it was at this time last year. — Daily News, Jan. 25, 1910 100 100 years years ago... ago... Setting it straight –––––––– It is the policy of the Daily News to correct as quickly as possible all errors in fact that have been published in the newspaper. If you feel a factual error has been made in a news story, call the news department at 527-2153. SECRET WITNESS 529-1268 A program of Tehama County Neighborhood Watch Program, Inc. Roundtable on jobs, growth USDA Rural Devel- opment, in partnership with Tehama Economic Development Corpora- tion and the Job Train- ing Center, will be hold- ing a county-wide roundtable on job cre- ation and economic growth 2:30-4:30 p.m. Tuesday, Jan. 26, at the Job Training Center, 724 Main St. in Red Bluff. The roundtable fol- lows the Forum on Jobs and Economic Growth that President Obama hosted at the White House Dec. 3, 2009. The roundtable will include business owners, residents, state and local officials, non-profit organizations, commu- nity leaders, economists and other interested par- ties. Participants will discuss steps that can to be taken to grow the economy and put Amer- icans back to work. The primary focus will be on ideas to accelerate job growth in rural America. Some of the topics to be dis- cussed are: • Exploring ways to rejuvenate and promote local businesses; • Creating jobs by rebuilding America's infrastructure; • Creating new opportunities from existing ones, such as with value-added agri- cultural products; • Supporting job growth among small businesses; and • Preparing workers for 21st century jobs. For an informational flier, visit www.job- trainingcenter.org. To reserve a space at this free roundtable, call Amanda Wigno at 529- 7000 or send an e-mail to awigno@ncen.org. In addition to this forum in Tehama Coun- ty, USDA Rural Devel- opment will join part- ners from throughout the Golden State to host a forum in nearly every county. For more information on the forums, or to find a location near you, visit www.rurdev.usda.gov/c a. Feuding granddaughters anger woman Annie's Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar Lesson learned OK class, today's assignment is to create the most annoying place ever; ready? Let's begin by populating it with lots of tired, irritable inhabitants con- fined to a cramped area with hardly any places to rest and absolutely no spot to get comfortable. Many of these folks will wear too much per- fume or, better yet, haven't seen the working end of a shower in days. Of course, the whole environment has to be far from home, and — oh yes — let's make it extremely loud. Now, let's spruce up the annoy- ance factor by tossing in some arcane commands. Rule one: You are only allowed to have in your ownership one contain- er of essential items; but the conse- quences for possessing those is that is you must drag them behind you wherever you go; a ball and chain. Rule Two: Not for a minute can you let them leave your custody. If you want to add more items, you can pur- chase from a very limited supply of things that will be far more costly than they should be, and you must stand in long lines to obtain them (don't forget, you must have your container always in tow). Rule Three: Nosy, ill-mannered, discour- teous natives will handle and interro- gate you at will, sporadically rum- mage through your package of per- sonal belongings, and time after time subject you to yet additional seem- ingly useless rules which may change at any time. I think we're done. What shall we call it? Dante's Inferno? Hell? How about, "An Airport?" Traveling has a knack to make anybody cranky; so, I had empathy for the nine-year- old with the pink suitcase waiting in the petrified line to board the jet. Her dad, bent close to her, staring unflinchingly into her eyes, was wagging his finger for emphasis and scolding her sotto voce. "We don't push people out of the way. We wait our turn, do you under- stand?" Her eyes drilling into the floor of the gateway, an angry expression contorting her face, she rocked defiant- ly from side-to-side, holding steadfast, "He's not 'people;' he's my little brother! And he's slow! I want to get on the airplane all ready! I'm tired!" "I understand," replied her father, "We're all frustrated. But that doesn't excuse pushing. Are we clear?" "I want to get on the airplane!" She stomped her foot for emphasis and crossed her arms across her chest. "We will go on the airplane when you apologize to Robbie. Tell him you're sorry." Begrudgingly realizing she had no choice and finally accepting the para- meters, she faced her sibling, mum- bled something, then looked back at Dad. "Very good," he said; hugged her, rose to his full height and took her by the hand as the family proceeded forward. She had learned her lesson, her reward being that she now able to proceed to her objective. As I watched the drama, it dawned on me that this process does not end when we move away from our parents. It is a sequence that presents itself continually: Frustra- tion. Lesson. Acceptance. Progress. Repeat cycle as necessary until learned. The only difference between those of us with single-digit ages and smooth skin, and those of us with a few years under our belts and a road map of wrinkles, is that we aren't always fortunate enough to have someone explain the guidelines so clearly. About the author: Scott "Q" Marcus is a THINspirational speaker and author. Since losing 70 pounds over 15 years ago, he conducts speeches, workshops, and presentations throughout the country. Contact him at 707.442.6243 or visit his weight loss support site at WeightLossTipBooklet.com. Scott Q. Marcus