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DILBERT ScottAdams PEARLSBEFORESWINE StephanPastis PICKLES BrianCrane BABYBLUES JerryScott&RickKirkman PHOEBEANDHERUNICORN DanaSimpson ZITS JerryScott&JimBorgman SHERMAN'SLAGOON JimToomey ARGYLESWEATER ScottHilburn BIZARRO DanPiraro DEARAMY»Aftermy daughter was born, I fought for custody for years. I was living with my parents during that t im e. M y da ug ht er s ta y ed with my mom during the day while I worked because I could not afford child care and a lawyer. Eventually I was granted full custody. I moved out of my parents' home with my daughter when she turned 5. I met a nice girl with a daughter of her own. We moved in together. Our kids love being around each other. The adjustment was very easy for us. We have now been together for two years. My mother helped me with the custody battle and I thank her for that, but now she thinks she can control every aspect of my daughter's life. She will not allow my fiancee to parent my daughter, nor does she accept her daughter, who is 4. My mom criticizes any choice I make with my fiancee. I am overly stressed out because I help my father after work and see Mom every day. Despite my mother's disruptive behavior, I feel she should still see my daughter regularly. My fiancee thinks she should be cut off because she does not listen to any of our choices. What can I do to keep the peace? —DesperateDad DEAR DAD » Your fian cee's stance — to cut off your mother — makes her seem almost as control- ling as your mother. You will have to be gentle and compassion- ate, but also very firm with your mother. Perhaps it would also help if you two parents were actually married and adopted each other's chil- dren, if possible. Taking this step will help all of you to clarify your roles. Understand your mother's special connec- tion, but do not reward her favoritism. If she mis- treats the younger child then you shouldn't trust her to spend time alone with the older child. You and your fiancee should include your mother on your terms, without al- lowing her to dominate. An objective media- tor could help all of the adults in this situation by discussing the practical roles, as well as the feel- ings involved. A pastor or social worker could serve this role. If you offer your mother mediation and she won't cooperate, then the very tangible conse- quence is that your family will want to spend less time with her. That will be your bottom line. DEAR AMY » "Frustrated" wanted to discipline her 5-year-old "spoiled brat" of a stepdaughter. I could not believe your advice to her. One thing that's wrong with this world today is that there are too many spoiled brats who haven't been disciplined. — Disgusted DEAR DISGUSTED » I received not one response supporting my compas- sion toward this child. A stepparent should not dis- cipline; she should teach and lead. In this case, the child's father should ap- ply the discipline. Dad worries, his mother and fiancee fight over his child You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribpub.com and follow her on Twitter @askingamy. Amy Dickinson Ask Amy Sudoku Instructions:Theobjectistoplacethe numbers1to9intheemptysquaresso thateachrow,eachcolumnandeach 3x3boxcontainsthenumberonlyonce. AnswertoPreviousPuzzle CelebrityCipher ByLuisCampos Instructions:CelebrityCiphercryptogramsarecreatedfromquotationsbyfamouspeople, pastandpresent.Eachletterinthecipherstandsforanother. NEACrossword Libra(Sept.23-Oct.23) — Time spent with people who have headed in a different direc- tion than you will provide food for thought and options that you hadn't considered. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — Unnecessary arguing will hinder you from taking care of your responsibilities. Don't get involved in someone else's affairs. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — Take part in as many social events as possible in order to get the opportunity to promote your plans and gather support. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — Don't overspend when trying to help others. Sticking to a strict budget will help you ease stress. Offer your advice. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Keeping cool, calm and collected will help your day run smoothly. Even if you face opposition, your diplomatic at- titude will force others to bend and meet you halfway. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — Securing your future will take work. Do whatever is neces- sary, even if it means forgoing a social event. Your instincts are sharp, and disciplined focus will help you reach your goals. Aries (March 21-April 19) — Your creative energy is riding a crest. No matter what you de- cide to do, you will get positive results. Rewards will follow, and a gracious response will ensure recognition. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — Before tackling something new, take care of your responsibili- ties. In order to avoid tension, live up to your promises and don't leave unfinished business for others to complete. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — With your people skills, you will come out ahead of the competition. You know just what to say to persuade others to join you. Ask for help if you need it. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — A trip down memory lane will have an influence on your fu- ture. If you reconsider previous goals and relationships, you will be able to pick up where you left off. Love is in the air. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — Don't let your talents go to waste. Look up happenings in your area. There is bound to be a community or neighborhood event that will benefit from your experience and input. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — Don't get involved in a dispute. If you control your emo- tions and listen to the advice people are offering you, you will discover what you need to do to advance. Horoscope By Eugenia Last WEDNESDAY, OCT. 7 WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 7, 2015 REDBLUFFDAILYNEWS.COM |YOURDAILYBREAK | 3 B