Up & Coming Weekly

DECEMBER 16-22, 2009 UCW 5 WWW.UPANDCOMINGWEEKLY.COM MARGARET DICKSON, Contributing Writer COMMENTS? 484-6200 ext. 222 or editor@upandcomingweekly.com. Smooch That Baby Now! by MARGARET DICKSON I am a Dr. Spock mother and make no apologies about it. Benjamin Spock was a '40s and '50s pediatrician and pop culture phenomenon who wrote a wildly successful book for parents called Baby and Child Care, which was published in 1946 and which remains among the best sellers of all time. Dr. Spock later became a political activist, but that is a column for another day. His child rearing ideas have infl uenced generations of parents and remain with us today. Dr. Spock's basic ideas fl ew in the face of the prevailing stern, authoritarian theories of raising children, which demanded strict discipline and which can be summed up by saying "better seen than heard." The emphasis was on no "spoiling," whatever that might mean. Dr. Spock, in contrast, believed and preached that parents really know more about their children than anyone else does, that families should be fl exible and affectionate, and that children should be treated as the individuals they are. These were revolutionary ideas, blessedly embraced by subsequent famous pediatric authors, and I suspect most parents today operate under them, even if they have never heard of Benjamin Spock. It turns out now that Dr. Spock was absolutely right, and there is science to prove it. We hear a great deal these days about early childhood education. That education is not just what happens in a pre-school classroom somewhere. It begins at home, at birth and even before birth. Science of all sorts is confi rming that young human brains are developing at lightning speed and that they are pliable and adaptable, soaking up every piece of information from sound to touch to emotional connection that comes their way. The bazillion little connections that must be made in our brains and nervous system are being laid down exponentially during the fi rst fi ve years of life. All this slows down as we human beings get older, meaning that the older we get, the less fl exible we are and the less able to adapt to change and challenge. We all know about this in elderly folks, but it is occurring as children develop as well, making early learning critical to human development. When my three precious jewels were babies, I hugged and smooched them at every opportunity, carried them in my arms, whispered and sang to them, and kept them close even when others thought this was too much mothering, that I was "spoiling" them. I behaved like this not because Dr. Spock thought it was a good idea or because I knew anything about connecting neurons, but because I simply could not keep my hands off my babies and, sometimes, still cannot today — much to their embarrassment, I suspect. Science tells us now that such interactive behavior between adults and young children is called "serve and return," even though that sounds like a tennis term to me. Whatever we call it, it is vitally important to children's neurological development. Their genes give them basic structure, but their early experiences determine how their basic brain structure develops. Increasingly, science says that early interactions and relationships determine how human beings become who we are, how we are going to perform in life, our mental health, our interpersonal skills, in short, everything that makes us human beings. The good news is that the things that I believe come naturally to most of us — loving, touching, caring for and exposing our children to new and positive experiences — are the building blocks for a well- adjusted and productive human being. The bad news is that these critical circuits must be laid down in early childhood, because it is diffi cult if not impossible to do so after one's brain "sets." It is not only diffi cult but also expensive to "rewire" the brain. Early intervention makes a big difference when a young child shows signifi cant delays in walking, talking or is not interacting well with parents or others. Very young children who need and receive glasses, hearing aids, or special therapies often enter kindergarten ready to succeed without the need for additional resources. Scientists have come up with the term "toxic stress" to defi ne what happens in early childhood that disrupts normal and positive brain development. This happens when a child experiences chronic and unrelieved stress from sources like extreme poverty and abuse and neglect. Young children who experience toxic stress may not develop all those bazillions of necessary connections that others do, making their lives a harder row to hoe and with implications for their future learning, physical and mental health and social interactions and behavior. And, that, folks, has implications for the rest of us as well which is why we should all care about everyone's early childhood development. The Dickson precious jewels, now including a cherished fourth who joined us in her wedding dress, will be home for the holidays. I think they know what they are in for in the hugging and smooching department. I also think Dr. Spock would approve. THIS WEEK WITH MARGARET THIS WEEK WITH MARGARET NOW NOW OPEN OPEN NOW NOW OPEN OPEN Where the Smart Shoppers Go! Where the Smart Shoppers Go! Where the Smart Shoppers Go! 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