Issue link: https://www.epageflip.net/i/53221
Saturday, January 21, 2012 – Daily News 5A FEATURES Licentious lady lacks lament, lobs libelous locutions Dear Annie: I am 44 years old and have been married for 12 years. This is my first marriage and her third. My wife had a year- long affair with a co- worker. We tried coun- seling, but her inability to end the affair forced me to move out, although we have not divorced. I also found out that her two previous marriages ended because of her infidelity. Four months ago, my wife ended the affair, and we returned to counseling. Howev- er, during our separation, I reconnected with an old female friend. There is no romance or sex involved. I told my wife about the friendship, but she feels betrayed and doesn't think she can forgive my "emotional affair.'' Annie's Mailbox by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar is being so self-right- eous about something that never happened, when she had an actual affair — emotional and physical. Our coun- selor believes she may be going through menopause and has asked me to be patient. But I've already been dealing with this for 18 months. I want to save my marriage, but it's as if the real reason for our separa- tion is being pushed under the rug so we can concentrate on my nonexistent "emotional affair.'' I'm not blaming the counselor. My wife cannot focus on anything but my wrongdo- ing. How do I tactfully remind her I am frustrated that my wife that she's the one who betrayed our marriage and that I stopped all contact with my friend but she continues to work with hers? — Not Cheating at Texas Hold 'Em Dear Texas: We think your wife is keeping the focus on you in order to justify her own cheating. Please ask your coun- selor to work on that. If your wife refuses to take responsibil- ity for her part in your marital troubles, there isn't much hope for a successful future with her. Dear Annie: This is for "Baffled Nurse in Indiana,'' who was upset to see parents steal the office tongue depressors and exam gloves as toys for their children. I agree with her. Some folks' sense of entitle- ment is off the charts. No one has the right to help himself to supplies in a doctor's office, especially for children, who are notorious for not washing their hands. You can imagine the germs spread by their grubby little paws. Not to mention, this Q: I'm a 70-year-old woman, and I have read that my chance of being injured by a fall will increase as I grow older. I also hear that foot problems cause many falls. Is that true? If so, what can I do about it? A: You are cor- rect that as we age, we are more likely to fall. Unfortu- nately, it is not uncommon for these falls to cause bruises, cuts, bro- ken bones and even seri- ous head injuries. But the good news is that there certainly are things you can do to lower your risk. Why are older adults more likely to fall in the first place? Some experts believe that as we get older, natural changes in our feet cause us to fall more easily. For one, as you age you have less feeling in your feet. This may cause you to feel off balance. Also, the shape of your feet changes as you age. Your feet flatten out. Your toes may curl into "claw toes" because of muscle imbalance. These and other physical changes may force you to walk differently or lose your balance, causing you to fall. Dr. K by Anthony L. Komaroff, M.D. It is also possible that foot pain is responsible for increased falls. Both bunions and claw toes create extra pressure that can be painful. Injuries and chronic dis- eases such as dia- betes can creep up in old age and cause foot pain, as well. It's likely that natural changes and pain are both to blame for falls. No mat- ter what the cause, it has been proven that taking care of your feet can help reduce your risk of falling. Here are some things you can do: — First, choose your shoes wisely. Many peo- ple don't actually know their true shoe size. If you buy shoes in a store, be sure to have the salesper- son measure you before you try shoes on. If you buy shoes online, use a standard conversion chart that can convert your foot's length and width in inches (or centimeters) into your shoe size. You should be able to find a chart online by typing "shoe size conversion" into a search engine. Be careful not to measure only the length of your foot. Width is important too. Your foot may need more room than it used to. — Never wear shoes that are loose or untied. Don't wear shoes with shiny, slippery soles, or with thick rubber soles that can catch on carpets. Flat shoes with thin but wide soles will give you the best feel of the floor and the greatest stability. — Wearing shoes, even at home, is important. Research shows that wearing shoes indoors, rather than padding around barefoot or in slip- pers or socks, may pre- vent serious injury from a fall. — Another way you can avoid falling is to lose weight. Dropping a few pounds could literally take a load off your feet, sparing you some pain and possibly reducing your chances of falling. — Orthotics may also be a good option. Studies show that orthotics may prevent some falls by sta- bilizing the feet, redistrib- uting pressure, and pro- viding additional tactile input so your brain gets a little bit of extra informa- tion about what your feet are doing. Custom-made orthotics, made from an only adds to the through-the- roof medical charges. Ah, I feel better now. — Sue in Omaha Dear Sue: Thanks for weigh- ing in. A few readers are on your side, but you are in the minority. Read on: From New York: I'm a mom who has, more times than I care to recall, been shut up in a minuscule exam room with two irritable kiddos for longer than even Mr. Rogers could be expected to entertain them. I think the cost of an exam glove balloon and a few tongue depressor puppets is a small price to pay for a doctor's lack of consideration for a patient's time and sanity. Morris, Ill.: I can tell ''Baf- fled Nurse'' when it became OK for parents to help themselves to doctor supplies for the purpose of entertaining. It happened a few years after it became OK to force patients to wait an hour in the waiting room and then another 30 minutes in the exam room. If doctors want to save money on supplies, they should stop being so greedy and lighten their patient load. Chicago: Instead of com- plaining about her clients, per- haps ''Baffled Nurse'' should talk to her boss about ways to eliminate the waiting time. Medical services professionals need to understand that their patients' time is as valuable as their own and operate accord- ingly. Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. Seniors can avoid falls by choosing the right shoes cises for the feet and ankles can help reduce age-related muscle loss and stiffness. Some exercises may seem a little goofy, but they serve a purpose. For example, picking up mar- bles or small stones with your toes helps strengthen muscles that may counter- act the tendency of toes to curl. But foot exercises aren't the only kind of activity that benefits the feet. Yoga, for instance, may prevent foot prob- lems. You asked about feet, impression of your foot, cost at least several hun- dred dollars. The prefabri- cated kind cost about $50. Based on research, both types may work to reduce pain and prevent falls. It makes sense, then, to try the prefabricated orthotics first before investing in the expensive custom- made ones, unless you have a major foot defor- mity that clearly needs custom treatment. — Lastly, you might consider exercising your feet to prevent falls. Exer- but you should know that there are many other ways to reduce your risk of falling. Good nutrition, especially getting the right amounts of protein, calcium and especially vitamin D, can help. Avoiding sedatives and excess alcohol, doing exercises for leg strength and balance, and correct- ing problems with your vision are also important. And don't forget to make sure your environment is safe. That includes elimi- nating stray electrical cords and loose rugs at home and avoiding ice and snow outdoors. Feet first? Perhaps. But don't forget the other things that can help keep you on the up and up. Sacred drumming circle to be held at Redding center Sacred Drumming Circle presented by Lynn E. Fritz Karuk Tribal Descendent and Licensed Marriage Family Therapist from 6:30-7:30 p.m. on Sunday, Feb. 12 at special guest location: Center for Spir- itual Living Meditation Pavilion, 1905 Hartnell Ave., in Redding. Experience the Spiritual practice of drumming. Bring your own drum, shaker or use your hands! All ages welcome, but minors must be accompanied by an adult. A $5 Donation per person recommended. An Interfaith Sacred Service presented by Rev. Lynn E. Fritz and Kathy Zavada, recording/performing artist, will be 7- 8:30 p.m. on Wednesday, February 29, at Pilgrim Congregational United Church of Christ, 2850 Foothill Blvd, in Redding. Inspirational music, ritual, reflections from various Faith Traditions, guest pre- senters: Rev. Rod Brayfindley, First Unit- ed Methodist, opening prayer and ritual, NORTH VALLEY MATTRESS 20% off Entire Inventory 632 Main St., Red Bluff 527-5837 Rev. Judith Churchman, Center for Spiri- tual Living, Practice with the mystical and ancient singing bowl. For more information on either event call 530 243-8862 or visit www.lynn- fritz.com. CUSTOM WE HAVE MOVED TO 333 S. Main St. Suite H Refurbished HP Dual Core Laptop $ 3600n Color Laser Printer $ 225 200 We carry Copy & Printer Supplies 20% off with this ad Labor, Parts & Accessories 530-690-3331 Best of Tehama County 2009 * 2010 * 2011 Mon.- Fri. 11am-6pm Sat. 11am-3pm 22825 Antelope Blvd. Red Bluff 528-0799 HOME OF THE BEST TRI-TIP THIS SIDE OF THE HUDSON RIVER 2 Bud's BBQ